Mad Potters & Dead Wicked Witches

You know I’d almost forgotten about this place. I’ve had a bumpy month in my life and work has been the stress factory filled with long hours of torture. No time for the inkernet or AI related things.

Friday morning I was filled with celebratory glee when TMZ broke the news that Kara DioGuardi was unceremoniously fired from Idol. While I do have sympathy for anyone that loses a high paying gig in this crap economy I cannot think of anyone more deserving of a pink slip.

Sure, last season Kara had some reasoned and valid critiques. For the first time. But there was just something about her, like a burr under the saddle on a bronco, unseen but irritating as hell. Every time she opened her mouth on American Idol I was seized by the sudden urge to slap her hard, rattle all her veneers and leave a mushy dent in her Botoxed forehead. Eventually it dawned on me that I hated her entire holier than thou mien, the fact that each word from her mouth was dripping with condescending self superiority.

Hearing that Ellen DeGeneres weaseled out of the gig too filled me with happiness. Ellen is good at stand up, talk shows and sitcoms, she should stick to those genres. But she was painful to watch last year on Idol. No authority on anything musical I don’t care how much she dances and sings to old songs on her talk show.

Being replaced by Stephen Tyler and JLo sounds like a particularly bad idea to me too. I have to admit I was hoping for Courtney Love or someone equally interesting. Idol is enough to make Tyler start using again and JLo is just as pompously self superior as Kara. Will suck worse.

There’s nothing happening much in the world of David Cook fraus except that everyone is starting to make ridiculous plans for his gig at Busch Gardens in Williamsburg Virginia. I’d be half tempted to go just to watch the assclowns, I’m within giggling and pointing distance from Busch Gardens. But I have spies going that will get me the skinny without myself having to brave the heat and mediocrity.

So Dave is still working on his sophomore album? The only thing I hear on the boards about Cook these days is about his crotch tickler, his new long bizarro (according to fraus) mustache. Makes me laugh. Poor guy should be allowed to sport whatever length mustache he wants even if it is apparently starting to resemble that of the Mad Potter of Biloxi George Ohr. There are worse looks. It’s just facial hair, folks, nothing to get your panties in a twist about.

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3 Comments on “Mad Potters & Dead Wicked Witches”

  1. ruckin.fetards Says:

    Hmmmm….something tells me your spy won’t find any “skinny” there! BWAHAHAHAAAAAA! Shouldn’t be a problem finding the “ugly truth” though.

  2. Natasha Says:

    Some plan on sleeping out overnight for a 6 pm show. Just to get a good general admission seat.

  3. freedavidcook Says:

    That should be funny AND fun. There’s no way in hell the staff at BGW is going to allow Hambeasts to sleep on the sidewalk in the park when the park closes. It’s not like the sidewalk at the Nokia.

    Drove past BGW this afternoon on my way home from the beach and thought about this confloption.

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