Why? Neil Lambert Is Alive & Well

I’m too sick and bedridden to rant about Cook fans today but I have noticed people coming in here under the dumbest of search engine terms today.

Now usually when we get search engine terms showing up on the stats it’s either pornographic like “Wet Fat Asses” or “Lady Blows Dogs” or it involves David Unbaldy Cook’s new hair. I get oodles of hits here every day saying things like ‘What did David Cook do to his hair?’ ‘Does American Idol David Cook wear a wig?” or my personal favorite – ‘Does David Cook have hair plugs?’

Today’s most searched terms were ‘Neil Lambert Suicide’ & ‘Did Adam Lambert’s brother kill himself’

What the fuck gives here folks? Is it so quiet in Lambertland that tards are making up random rumors about Adam family members now? Someone ‘splain it to me.

Tweeted Neil to ask him why the Sparkle Cows were Googling his possible suicide and he didn’t know.

Very bizarre fanbase I have to say.

I’ll be back with more David Cook CD release week once my diverticulitis decides if it’s going to get better.

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12 Comments on “Why? Neil Lambert Is Alive & Well”

  1. w.dark Says:

    Has anyone tweeted condolences? It’s not real until someone sends an e-card.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      I don’t think so and he seemed pretty alive and well when I contacted him. I would love to know who and how came up with this. It’s mind boggling.

      • w.dark Says:

        LOL – I saw that. Funny thing is that a google search for the same terms resulted in this site, and a few fanfiction archives. *shudder*

        I wonder if it’s in the sooper seckrit fan club forums. šŸ˜‰

  2. BBF27 Says:

    Wow! You must be sick! No posts on Cooks dismal sales projections? No snark about how the Heiffers were over at DCO were gloatingly predicting 150 – 250k the first week and he’s coming in at 40k?

    I hadn’t heard the one about Neal Lambert though. Who starts this stuff?

    Hope you feel better.

    • MmmmBop Says:

      Who starts this stuff?? FDC did.
      A google search leads to this site and this site only.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Mmmmbop, when I have fifty or sixty hits looking for this I have to take a look at it. Looks like it also leads to *surprise, surprise* fan fiction, repulsive real person fan fiction. You neglected to mention that trying to make it look like I was brewing up controversy via Google. Nothing the Sparkle Cows Googe in regards to Adam ever surprises me. He does seem to have a better handle on his tards than Cook does I have to say.

        Speaking of lame, you coming here to call me lame trying to figure out why tards are looking for suicide of Neil is pretty lame. A big old cup of lame for everybody.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Actually, why am I even attempting to be nice to you. Go suck on a lentil chip..

      • MmmmBop Says:

        You don’t have to be nice to me. Be yourself. Should I follow your example and make suggestion what you should suck on?

      • MmmmBop Says:

        BTW, funny that w.dark google search produced the same results mine did….

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Same stuff I came up with which is why I was so confused by someone searching that term. The weird porno ones I get, the internet is just filled with weird porn searches, it’s the odd ones that catch my attention. Most common searches involve wanting to know if Cook had a hair transplant.

      • w.dark Says:

        I don’t find it funny at all MmmmBop. Someone heard something and googled it to see if it was true. The entire internet isn’t on Google you do realize? Private forums, sites that aren’t indexed, a large amount of recently updated blogs and pages don’t make the search results for up to 14 days, if ever.

        I also found a comment made waaaaaay back about a suicide bomber on his Twitter. In spite of the limited results, I did get 5 pages worth.

        I think search engine terms are hilarious. Some of the ones that led to my site here “woah! WHATTHEFUCK?” worthy. And others were just inane.

        My guess is it started on the paysite, or ontd_something. (btw – don’t do an LJ search. You get shit like “death fic, adam lambert, fanfiction, adommy, suicide fic, tommy joe ratliff ” as a result. WTF is wrong with these people?

  3. hemp Says:

    ……Only in America this season honors Idol farewell song done by David Cook. ……David Cook has been a part of American Idol at the right time before Simon Cowell Paula Abdul and virtually everyone except Ryan Seacrest and Randy Jackson bailed on the show.

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