Bus Full Of David Cook Tards…

… too bad they’re not going off a high cliff into the rapacious jaws of hungry alligators. That scenario would make these silly photos much more amusing.

Okay, so there’s this group of Cooktards at DCO that call themselves the “Busted Girls” and “We R Busted”. They like to refer to David Cook as “Master” and make insane amounts of photoshopped pictures of them and Cook on adventures together on the tour bus. There is mention of spanking and paddles, pictures of paddles, talks of paddling as punishment and as a treat. It is all so so.. 6th grade… not even middle school. And it’s all over on a thread at DCO. They wonder why we think they are a bunch of nut cases.

They even have their own Twitter too.

I was going to post a few of their photos here but I think not. I don’t want to go near them with someone else’s ten foot dick. When I first took a look at the series I’m sure my jaw dropped and my eyes bugged out by the sheer silly spectacle of it all. Again, this is not what normal rational adult human beings do when they are the fans of a singer/musician. The best thing they could do to support Dave and the guys is a) buy the music, b) buy the merch and c) go to the concerts. Nothing else, no bus fantasies, no spanking fantasies, no ignoring your little kids to the point where you are feeding them PB&J for every meal for days on end while you photoshop your stupidity lust fantasies of being in a Non-Baldy Bus-riding getting-spanked harem.

How long will it take them all to go bi for Cook? Eventually in every sexual fantasy-laden tarddom some decide to handle the sexual tension by going gay with each other as it’s the closest any of them will ever come to Cook’s crotch. Are we near that point in Cookdom yet>

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390 Comments on “Bus Full Of David Cook Tards…”

  1. nonna-muss Says:

    Ummmmm……huh. Errrrr…..ummmmm……wow.

    Is there a way to unsee what’s already been seen?? If not, you owe me a 5 gallon jug of brain bleach FDC.

  2. Fluffy Says:

    Aaaaah! Hurts!!! *Gouges out eyes*

  3. burt Says:

    Just when you think you’ve heard it all and that it couldn’t get any stranger…

    So, um, should I click on the links?

  4. MmmmBop Says:

    FDC, I bow to you.
    Just when I thought I’ve seen everything….

  5. Thorazine Says:

    What. the. Hale.

    Where do these loons come from? Knowing about such batshit crazy fans doesn’t help me take Cook seriously, at all. It’s a little irrational I know, but when I look at him or hear his music, I envision lonely old women who find living in this fantasy world that revolves around the bearded and balding winner of the best little karoake show in the world kinda sad. The S&M overtones, that ‘Master’ bullshit just pushes it beyond the pale lol. Can’t convince me that the few remaining fans he has are any more ‘normal’ than these freakozoids, if you scratch deep enough πŸ™‚ May this tour, if it ever materializes, be a new start for him in acquiring some new fans – even I think this poor schlub has suffered enough πŸ™‚

  6. nerdgirl Says:

    Obviously, Cook enables the crazies, since this stuff appears of the OFFICIAL Cook website.

    • Ali Says:

      I wondered the same thing. This has been on since the beginning of DCO and the originals bragged about bringing it over from that wordnerd worship website that started when David was on Idol. I’m surprised it’s still on DCO, I don’t even remember my pass word, haven’t been there in years. But I don’t think they ever ban any post, or members unless they break rules, or are pornographic. I don’t think it’s enabling really, just not wanting to push fans off the official site.

      Most of the threads there were all about his body parts, so if they started banning those, there would probably be no forum at all, except for the hand wringing (panty wadding) about his sales numbers lol!

      • Ali Says:

        Point taken…I clicked the link for busted and at the top, where it list the next thread…says “you know we need a Dave’s beautiful neck thread”…Ummm, correction ladies, NO YOU DO NOT!

  7. Rubber Ducky Says:

    Amateurs. Frauen have been doing this childish crap since the Claymates. They’re so unoriginal.

  8. Black Angel Says:

    For the life of me, I’ll never understand why a grown woman would revert to tween fantard behavior. Aren’t they embarrassed by this?

    • freedavidcook Says:

      Apparently not because anyone that calls them out on it becomes a big poo-poo head meanie in their minds, a big meanie that deserves to have their boss/family/friends complained to that they are a big meanie poo-poo head.

      I’ll never understand why they act like this. I used to act like this in the early 70s over the Osmond Brothers, but I was 12 and didn’t know any better. You expect it out of a tween, you don’t expect it out of an adult.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I used to pretend like John Taylor from Duran Duran was my boyfriend but… I was in middle school.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Willie Ames was my middle school boyfriend. I broke up with him once I got to 9th grade though.

  9. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    I was unfortunate enough to come across this “We R Busted” thread when they redesigned the site a few months back. I’m no prude but I found the contents so disturbing I posted in the public forum about it to complain. Imagine my surprise when I looked at my post later to find out my comments about this sick thread were gone!! Then I got this PM from the Mod to explain, which completely offended me, and I haven’t posted there since: Heres what she said to me in PM

    “Hey there! Just wanted to let you know I have edited your recent post to remove any content found to be in violation of rules, terms and conditions of this website. I have saved the content below so that you may send it via email to d2cfeedback@sonymusic.com should you desire to do so.

    As an FYI, that particular thread, through precident, is under the purview of TPTB (i.e., they allowed it to remain on the forums after selectively editing it), and so it has been allowed to remain and continues to be moderated to ensure content remains in compliance with the sites rules, terms and conditions.”

    So this creepy thread is deemed appropriate and suitable for all, but MY complaining about it was deemed “offensive!” The creepiest thing for me is that Cook himself must be aware of and approve it, so now you see why I am still a tard,I am totally “sansdelusions.” I mean…ewwwww.

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Maybe it’s his way of keeping his “Looney List” completely up to date!

    • burt Says:

      OK, this has made me curious. I’m going to click the links…

      • burt Says:

        My eyes… my poor eyes… that’s some of the worst photoshopping ever. Maybe it’s the graphic designer in the Master keeps that thread open just so he can laugh at the “work”.

        If management and David know about it then I bet Nonna’s reason is quite spot on too.

      • WilcoisAwesome Says:

        Like bees to honey. How do you lure the crazies? Why you let them create threads about your body parts and with poorly edited PSP-created. There’s no better way to keep track of them.

    • Black Angel Says:

      This was a while ago, but I know for a fact that Taylor Hicks’ assistant kept a stalker list and showed it to my friend, who was invited to one of the after parties. She wanted to know if she was on the stalker list and she was not on the list. LOL!

      • burt Says:

        lol could you imagine saying “Oh you have a stalker list? Great. So, erm, am I on it?” Priceless! πŸ™‚

        Let’s face it, everyone who is remotely famous enough to attract these kind of fans will have that kind of list. There are these kinds of internet postings for all kinds of people. Doesn’t make it any less worrying but Cook is by no means alone.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        It’s been said from multiple sources that Cook has a list too.

      • burt Says:

        I bet it’s a longer than most too.

  10. Black Angel Says:

    I quit the fantard message boards a long time ago and I don’t even lurk anymore. Hard to believe I was a regular poster at one time. They are scary, offensive, and the mods are on a power trip, when they can easily censor anything they want. I’m convinced most tards post to get attention from their obsession or admiration from other posters.

    If I can convince even one tard to stop wasting their time and get a life, it would be worth it. If you like someone buy the music, play the music, go to a show – that’s all you need to do to be a good fan. Your obsession is never going to date you, marry you or have anything to do with you, EVER!

    • Cooks_FUFL Says:

      *Claps hands in total agreement*

    • burt Says:

      “Your obsession is never going to date you, marry you or have anything to do with you, EVER!”

      Especially if you’re putting/saying that sort of shit about them online! Fans can stand a chance if they’re attractive/the right age and depending on the object of your affection/the situation, but not if you’re doing stuff like that. I don’t understand why these people think he would want to be with anyone behaving like that – even for 5 minutes? Is he (or anyone in that situation) meant to be impressed by it? Do they really imagine that someone in that position will end up marrying someone who used to post Photoshopped images and weird fantasies online? Really? I guess so. Maybe it’s nice to be that deluded?

      • Black Angel Says:

        “Fans can stand a chance if they’re attractive/the right age and depending on the object of your affection/the situation, but not if you’re doing stuff like that.”

        I can’t imagine the hate that would be directed at the fan if David Cook or any Idol dated a fan. Seriously, her life might even be in danger with some of these psychos. But, I do agree if the fan is attractive and the right age, and not posting this silly, immature crap that they would have a chance. Why not?

      • Burt Says:

        Wow looks like someone is giving the “fans stand a chance too” thing a good go on Twitter. Pity her timeline is filled with talk about Cook and conversations with people he must love like our good friend Xavier.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Wait. I’m lost, who is giving the ‘fans stand a chance’ a go on twitter? What did I miss while I was living real life?

      • Burt Says:

        A woman on Twitter has been tweeting him (and once via Ryan Star) asking him on a date while he’s in New York. They are “the same age, have interests in common” (or something). I kinda admire her courage but at the same time can’t help but think one look at her timeline will tell him all he needs to know.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Any hints on who she is so I can look? Honestly, not even knowing or seeing her I don’t think she stands a chance in hell. lol

      • Burt Says:

        Search his @ name and “date” – a couple of tweets should come up in the search. You can see the timeline from there.

        Yeah, I agree. Although I said fans stand a chance with anyone I didn’t mean in those circumstances. πŸ˜‰

      • Jen Says:

        Lol! Wow. Isn’t she new-ish to the fandom? Met him at the Best Buy release day thing, befriended Becky? Or am I confusing her with someone?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I just looked her up. All he has to do is look at her timeline and who she spends her twitter time with and that would cross her off any dating list.

      • Karen D Says:

        Jen, it doesn’t look like that girl to me.

      • Burt Says:

        I don’t know who she is but I think I saw earlier that she posted photos from the release day events. If she did meet him then why not ask him in person or slip him a note? Funny to do it on Twitter where he can so easily look up her activity. It doesn’t take a genius to work out that he would look at that first and be totally put off, especially chatting to the man who was pushing the WB/9/11 idea. So weird.

  11. Black Angel Says:

    “How long will it take them all to go bi for Cook? Eventually in every sexual fantasy-laden tarddom some decide to handle the sexual tension by going gay with each other as it’s the closest any of them will ever come to Cook’s crotch. Are we near that point in Cookdom yet”

    This really did happen in the Soul Patrol tarddom. The tards were stupid enough to post it all over the internet, even photos were posted. Attention whoring or stupity? Who knows? But, if ever I needed brain bleach is when I saw those photos. Blech.

  12. Burt Says:

    Why are the Cook fans always surprised when he travels and turns up in NYC? Isn’t it obvious he would spend time where his label is (especially when they are in the middle of arranging a tour and other stuff)? Where else is he likely to go?

    After his tweet mentioning the UK, why do they now think he will be co-headling a tour in the UK where he’s not known – he’ll either support or do his own small headlining tour, no? And why would it be good to tour with Avril Lavigne? Those dates are soon but I thought they decided he isn’t touring until Neal is back with him?

    I don’t understand any of the logic tonight!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Tonight?? I don’t understand any of their logic ever!!! A great number of fans still think Neal is no longer in the band. I guess they feel it would be impossible, do not ask me why. I can’t wait until tour dates are announced. There will be many, many meltdowns by those whose city he’s not coming to. Tee-hee.

      • Burt Says:

        Haha you have a point there! I don’t usually follow the logic either but those few minutes were extra special.

        You might be in luck very soon Nonna! Looks like the tour details have been leaked – not totally following but I do not think there are locations yet, just a range of dates. Xavier tweeted David asking if it’s true and called him “kind sir” – hilarious. Anyway, I think the dates are when Neal is on tour so more speculation to come. So far I’ve seen suggestion that it will be an acoustic tour but even so, he usually does those with Neal, right? Logic again…

      • nonna-muss Says:

        An acoustic tour?? I just can’t see that. Maybe, the date range is quite short. There’s going to be drama tonight!!!

      • Burt Says:

        Yeah an acoustic tour seems unlikely with the album being as instrument heavy as it is. I would think he will get a fill-in or replacement if needed rather than play alone for all those dates and leave the remainder of the band at home.

  13. SeenTheLight Says:

    The interesting thing about the leak is I don’t think the hardcore fans have picked up on one minor detail. The company that leaked the information is a booking agency that books artists for college shows. If he’s touring with who the agency says he is, I imagine a lot tighter security and less access for non-students especially in the wake of what happened a few weeks back to the other artist.

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I picked up on it already and had flashbacks to the last tour. Anyone remember the raging fits that were thrown?? And we didn’t even have twitter yet!!! *runs to make bowl of popcorn*

    • Burt Says:

      A couple of them have picked up on it but don’t seem sure if it’s true. Also talk of arranging a private show – not sure if it’s serious.

      Will be interesting if it is college shows. As annoying as they are, I can’t imagine David excluding them totally from the shows, too much drama for him. Time will tell.

      I missed ALL the tour fiasco before. I’m in for some laughs, aren’t I?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Oh yes you are. When the dates are released there will be much complaining. People will complain (to him, mind you) that he’s not in their city or that he’s playing on a Wednesday night and they have to work or the closest show is a 2 hour drive. The list of complaints will be endless. The meltdowns will be plentiful.

      • Burt Says:

        I can already imagine it: “Why are you playing 15 minutes from my house when I’m 30 minutes away in the opposite direction at my best friend’s 60th birthday party. That’s so unfair. Never mind, I got tickets anyway. She’ll understand, it’s only the 135th time I’ll see you.”

        I bet he won’t be looking at his replies for a few days. I just hope they can understand he wants to do a massive tour and this is just the first phase of it. Oh, who am I kidding?!

      • Fluffy Says:

        Heh, you missed it all last time? Good times, good times.

  14. Ali Says:

    Wait what? So who is he touring with at the college dates? Or is the leak super secret and noone knows? It sounds like someone knows? Ummm Burt…Nonna…FDC? Lol…Please don’t make me tread into the twitter tardland lol!

  15. Ali Says:

    Seenthelight do you know who he’s touring with?

    • SeenTheLight Says:

      The rumor is Gavin DeGraw based on a tweet from Pretty Polly Productions: Gavin DeGraw and David Cook are hitting the road together! October 1 to November 20 – info@prettypolly.com

      • Fluffy Says:

        Selfishly – and hey, that’s what it’s all about, my enjoyment lol – I rather like that pairing and hope they come close to me so I can go check it out.

  16. just dont get it Says:

    i heard about the Gavin tour last night, but i didn’t get the sense it would be a college tour – ugh- it will be unbelieveable the lengths these people will go to to get into a show!! get ready college students!!!!!!!!!!

    • Fluffy Says:

      It’s fun to watch as they try to borrow IDs from students, pay students for their tickets, etc. I think some students made good $$ last time selling jacked-up-price tickets to nutty fans.

      • just dont get it Says:

        no doubts that will be running RAMPANT AGAIN!!! but my guess is that most shows will be open to the public – not sure they would be that profitable otherwise……jmo……

      • freedavidcook Says:

        I better tell my two kids in college to stockpile those tickets and sell for big bucks later…..

        that’s assuming this really is a college tour.

  17. Thorazine Says:

    Cook fans were handed their collective delusional asses on this site, after a reviewer posted a less than flattering review of his latest CD… the comments are GOLD.


    Can’t wait to see the fireworks when Cook opens for DeGraw on this alleged college tour, lolol… and when they won’t be able to score tickets this go round… the craziness and some of the freakozoids in this fanbase should be filmed for a documentary – how’s that for promo? πŸ™‚

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Thorazine, you make me LOL. No “review” by a random blogger is a review. Good, bad or indifferent any review by a blogger is what it is and carries no weight or has any bearing. A review by Rolling Stone, USA Today, E Weekly….those are reviews. After reading this it comes across to me as a disgruntled Archie fan who wants to get a dig at Cook. The comments were good though! I never got the whole spamming comments sections thing. They look like asses by doing that.

      • MmmmBop Says:

        Nonna, this is the review from E Weekly with the usual comments from Cooktards.
        Rolling Stone review:
        Are these reviews valid enough in your opinion?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Yes, mmmBop. I saw those reviews. Glad you brought them over and took the time to look for them. They ARE real reviews, whether they are good or bad. Blogs by fans are not reviews.

      • MmmmBop Says:

        Nonna, I don’t consider fans reviews to have any validity. I read comments under review of Cook’s single, Kris Allen YouTube of his new song and Lambert’s You Tube of his new song. (Both performed at concert)
        Judging from the comments each one sang equivalent of at least Lennon/McCartney/Bono/MJ/Leonard Cohen/Dylan songs combined.
        But that’s for fans are for, right?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Oh sure! That is what fans are for. I meant fans passing off their blogs as legitimate reviews. For example, WehoScott that we talk about here has a blog. (I can’t remember the name of it), but no where does he identify himself as WehoScott. When he ‘reviewed’ Cook’s album you would have thought John Lennon and Elvis rose from the dead and still couldn’t make an album as great as Cook’s. Unfortunately a lot of Cook fans thought it was a real review, it got posted on message boards, etc. until it was pointed out that it was Scott, a Cooktard. To me (even though I am a fan of Cook’s) that completely invalidated the ‘review’. The ones you posted are legitimate. Those people get paid for their opinions, whether I agree with them or not, it’s their job and they’ve (for the most part) been doing it for years and most likely have no particular bias, one way or the other.

      • MmmmBop Says:

        Nonna, sometimes even a professional reviewers have a tiny, itsy bitsy bias. But it’s fine with me, if an album is really good majority of reviewers will give it a thumb up. As I recall it is called Metascore or something like that.
        I always buy the album that I LIKE regardless of what critics have to say. Even if the album is a total crap. Beacuse at the end of the day I’m the one who is stuck with it.. :))

      • freedavidcook Says:

        and that’s the way it should be. You should buy those albums you like irregardless of what the critics say.

    • Fluffy Says:

      I don’t mean to be rude and certainly you’re entitled to your hate but… how is that any less weird than over the top love for the guy? Just curious. I have artists I don’t like, but I don’t spend any time talking about them or looking for things to post about them.

      I’d hardly say a random reviewer (and an Archie fan to boot) handed anyone their asses – I could post a scathing review about Lambert and would that be handing Glamberts their asses? Nope, I’m a random person who would be posting a random review.

      But yes, the comments are mortifying and I don’t see what people think they are achieving by it. They just look like idiots. While a negative review is hardly an ass-handing, people are entitled to their opinion. My husband thinks tomatoes are the best thing ever I hate them with the fire of a thousand suns… different strokes for different folks πŸ™‚

      • nonna-muss Says:

        OMG Fluffy! I catch shit all the time because of how I loathe tomatoes. I also hate french fries, people have trouble understanding that, but it’s true.

        I think Cook denied Thorazine something she feels she was owed. Her hate for him and her urge to come here to put him down are interesting. This blog is about fan bad behavior, not his record reviews/sales.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I honestly am curious about that kind of stuff, I always wonder if there’s a reason for it, or if it’s just fun for some people… I mean, I’m all about snark but not loathing πŸ™‚

        I hate tomatoes but I like salsa and ketchup. I will never quite understand that. Oddball, I suppose, heh.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Wonder if she bought that atrocious looking hardbound autobiography I saw languishing in the 4 buck bin at the bookstore by Archie?

      • Fluffy Says:

        Heh. What’s Archie’s book called? “Chords of Strength” or something? I like Archie and all, just not sure why I’d need a biography/autobiography of a kid that young. Live a little, then check back in πŸ™‚

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Don’t remember the title of the book but that’s why I passed on it, he has such little life experience. Normally I will buy those remaindered bios just because I don’t want to pay full price, I love bios & history but I cannot imagine it wasn’t ghost written and padded with bs.

      • MmmmBop Says:

        Didn’t Biebs write an autobiography based on his lifetime (all of 16 years) experience?
        I recall it sold pretty well, but Fetus’ fans will buy ANYTHING produced by their idol.

    • itsaname Says:

      That reviewer loves Lee and his music moves her, but Cook puts her to sleep? Archie should have won? That’s not a review. It’s a disgruntled Idol fan who is bitter that Cook has had more success than her favorites.

    • cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

      For someone who professes to despise Cook as much as you seem to, you sure spend a lot of time in here obsessing over him. What did he ever to to you? Indifference to an artist (or anyone) for that matter you don’t care for, yeah, perfectly normal, but most people just don’t fret over those they don’t like (read: they move on) but given that you keep coming here specifically to bash HIM, when this site is really meant for tard-baiting, is just well, sad.

    • Yikes– I just finished reading that particular train wreck. Plenty of knickers in knots from those who disagreed with the reviewer.

      So she didn’t like it. Big woo. I don’t like cream corn. So does that make me not worthy of eating ever again.

      People–it’s her opinion. Those who got all in an uproar need to give it a rest. You like the CD? Good for you. You hated it? Next CD please.

  18. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    ETA: My last comment should have been addressed to Thorazine, in case it wasn’t clear!!!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Don’t worry! We all knew who you were addressing! πŸ˜€

      I don’t get Thorazine either. For example I do.not.like. John Mayer. I have never visited a board, blog, comment section about him. I don’t read reviews of his records, concerts, etc. I don’t follow his sales. I’d really love to know know what Cook did to Thorazine. Maybe she blew him and he said it sucked. Hahahaha. (get it?)

      • Burt Says:

        Yep, it was perfectly clear. You know I’ve tried asking Thorazine what the deal is but she (? I’m still assuming) won’t engage in any discussion that doesn’t revolve around how badly David is doing. It’s very strange and I can only think that he has done something to offend her. Whether it was personal or related to his career, I don’t know, but why else would anyone have that level of dislike?

        Thorazine – I say this with all sincerity, you worry me. It’s not normal to spend so much time looking at stuff online and then visiting blogs/forums to talk about someone you dislike. It doesn’t achieve anything, especially here where we might laugh at the exploits of his fans, but at lot of us like him or at least don’t have anything against him. Seriously, talk to someone (even us, we’re more than curious after all), get help and find something else to do with your time. You’ll be happier, the bitterness isn’t eating away at anyone but you.

  19. YoTaylor Says:

    Every reviewer has an agenda. This reviewer clearly has issues with David Cook, she reveals them very clearly. There is very little substantive criticism there, as to instrumentation, vocals, production. Only the generic “generic” tag. She needs to read the reviews of folks like Stephen Thomas Erlewine to see how a proper review is done. That being said, there is not one person commenting that has pointed out her lack of really useful criticism for a person considering whether to buy the album. Yes the comments by the fans are embarrassing, hysterical, and moronic. They really need to get a grip.

    Here is my 2 cent review of the album. Half is good, 1/4 is “meh”,1/4 is crap. Unfortunately, the biggest piece of crap on the album is “The Last Goodbye” which is the single. The label probably made a deal with their bigshot house writer Ryan Tedder that one of his songs would be the first single in exchange for working on the album. But it’s a shit song! Someone at the label should grow some balls and release “Time marches On” or “Paper Heart”, something that would stand out on the radio. Even if they did, I doubt there would be much promo because new releases from Kelly, Daughtry, and Lambert will be their main priority in the fall. Basically, this album is toast.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      TLM could merely be Cook reading the phone book and the tards would proclaim it the BEST THING EVER!!!!!!! while those that dislike him would say their usual and those telling it like it is would be put down as ‘evil haters’ Reviews, legitimate or not, really don’t matter much to the average buyer. I’ve bought plenty of CDs because I heard a snippet somewhere and liked it without looking up reviews or asking others what they thought. Getting the greatest number of ears to hear and like is the key.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I don’t think I’ve ever bought (or not bought) an album based on what a critic says. Unless that critic has a track record of liking the same things I do… well, different strokes for different folks and all that. That said, I’m not going to go on any critic’s site that disagrees with me and call them a jellus hater either πŸ™‚

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I agree about the lack of particular criticism. I like the album, don’t love it. I’m a Cook fan but that doesn’t mean I think it’s a masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. What I can’t wait for is for him to do it live. They become completely different songs. All the over-production on the instrumentation and his vocals are gone and every song is given a different edge and stripped down. It takes him a few shows to get to that point, trying different things/sounds as the tour moves on until he’s hit the sweet spot he’s aiming for.

      A great example of this was a song from the last record that was a total sleeper for me–I Did It For You. Live it was incredible.

      • just dont get it Says:

        i totally agree with you Nonna! what i find interesting is that this album, for the most part, seems way high-pitched to me, he almost seemss to be screaming rather than singing in parts, and that would take quite a toll on him touring. He rarely sang avalanche last tour – i’m pretty sure for that reason, and that isn’t even that high!! he would really have to change these songs up, and I can’t wait to hear it!!

      • Burt Says:

        I agree Nonna. I think he’s at his best live anyway but I’m looking forward to hearing how the tracks translate live because they often totally change.

        JDGI, I’m glad it’s not just me that noticed the higher pitch! Hope he lowers it so he can sing those tracks without ruining his voice.

      • 100% spot on, nonna.

        What can be done (and fixed, smoothed over, done again) in the studio is the easy part. Having to perform live, cope with broken strings, feedback from amps and screaming tards in the front row while still pulling off a great version of a song is what counts in my book.

        Cook live is a whole other bag of tricks.

  20. Cooks_FUFL Says:

    Definitely agree with the screaming on a lot of the songs he sings…gets tiresome to listen to after awhile. I have not listened much to the new cd…just have chosen to move on from my former tard state. *shrugs* Clarity is a wonderful gift…
    As for Thorazine, while the blogger didn’t “review” the cd in a positive light, I think the point was the outlandish behavior of the CookTards in the comments section. Those idiots give fans a bad name, and all of this behavior crap is one reason why a lot of us have found the light. It’s OK for that blogger to state her opinion…even on here people seem to rush to David’s defense. People need to realize he may just not be all that…JMO. (LOL)

    • Fluffy Says:

      I don’t feel like I need to defend him because I have never cared if other people like music I like but… if it’s ok for the blogger to state an opinion that he’s *not* all that, I’d argue that it’s also ok for his fans to think he *is* all that, even if you’re no longer one of them πŸ™‚

      • Fluffy Says:

        Granted I wish they’d do it in a more sane manner, but they wouldn’t be fans if they didn’t think he was great. So I’m totally ok with that, and thinking an artist is awesome does not a tard maketh. It just means you’re a *fan*.

      • Cooks_FUFL Says:

        Uh, there is a HUGE difference between a tard and a fan, and while I think some musical acts/actors, etc. are awesome, I do not shove my opinions down peoplle’s throats. (Not saying you do, Fluffy–saying a LOT of his tards do that.) I didn’t say I was not a fan…I said my tard days have ended and I can be more objective. Judging by your response to my post, you are not so objective in your thinking.

    • Black Angel Says:

      I agree with you Cooks_FUFL. People have different taste in music and that blogger has every right to state their opinion, whether it’s good or bad.

      The soul patrol and the glamberts are famous for attacking people like a blood-thirsty pack of wolves. Defending them is not going to get you any closer to their crotch. These guys have moms, they don’t want you to be their mothers, protecting them from the big, bad bloggers. They will not like you more than the other fans because you defended them. They don’t know you and they don’t give a shit about you.

      Just enjoy the damn music and shut up!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Cooks_FUFL, I can only speak for myself. When Thorazine posted what she did I immediately thought she was pointing out the review because of her past behaviors. If anyone else here, you…Burt…FDC…posted that I would have looked at only the comments. All the Idol fan factions do the same thing, Cooktards are no different. It’s really something when a couple of the groups are commenting on the same article. They are at each others throats. Sad.

      I’m a fan. Maybe I have a little tard in me in that I’m excited for the tour dates to be announced and that kind of thing. I do not comment in comment sections or talk about his body parts (I saw another disturbing thread at DCO–David’s *Right* Leg) or that kind of thing.

  21. Black Angel Says:

    Attacking someone because they don’t like someone you like, is tard behavior.

    • Fluffy Says:

      It’s also arrogant and completely irrational – unless one thinks that groupthink is the way to go.

      • Cooks_FUFL Says:

        So you tell me it’s ok for the CookTards to think he is awesome and comment like they did, but then you say it’s arrogant and irrational? I don’t get it…really don’t. My clarity is being clouded! πŸ˜‰

      • Fluffy Says:

        Nooo, I said I think it’s ok for Cook fans to think that he’s all that, even if you don’t, just as much as it’s ok for someone to think he’s *not* all that. Not for a minute did I say it is ok for a bunch of nutburger fans to go post and criticize anyone who doesn’t believe what they believe.

        I took exception to this: “It’s OK for that blogger to state her opinion…even on here people seem to rush to David’s defense. People need to realize he may just not be all that…JMO. (LOL)” — especially since you decided to take a ding at fans that post here. Basically, and perhaps I misread you, but that comment read as “I saw the light, why can’t the rest of you?” Perhaps you were referring to your former tarding and you saw the light that tarding is stupid, but that was unclear from the comment.

        And this: “Judging by your response to my post, you are not so objective in your thinking.” If I don’t agree with you, I’m not objective?

        I suspect we’re coming from a similar place. I’m a fan – I enjoy the music, I enjoy the shows. I don’t bother posting in comment sections of reviewers who don’t agree with me, nor do I bother to post inside the Idol bubble anymore because pissing contests annoy the crap out me. My point was that if we’re going to say that it’s ok to have an opinion, we’re going to have to be ok with people not agreeing with our own opinion. And I think it’s perfectly ok for someone to think he’s all that… just don’t think it’s ok (or rational) to go fight with every person who disagrees.

        Because the comment had a little dig in there at folks here “rushing in to defend” him, I took the whole comment as “I saw the light that he’s not so great, you should too.” I apologize if that was misconstrued. Don’t care if that’s your opinion, just think both sides are valid because opinions are just that πŸ™‚

      • Fluffy Says:

        Never, never said it was ok for them to comment like they did, BTW. That’s sheer stupidity. Well, I guess they have the right. But it’s stupid.

  22. Black Angel Says:

    Let’s say a friend or acquaintance of yours were having a face-to-face discussion regarding David Cook and your friend said, they were not a big fan of David Cook, or not a fan of the type of music that you like; would you call them all sorts of names and be offensive to them? Tell them that they are stupid, that they don’t know anything about music? Of course not! You would probably agree to disagree and let it go. So, why is this OK on the internet? This kind of behavior is rude and offensive and gives the whole fanbase a bad name.

    • Fluffy Says:

      I would punch them in the face and then while they were down show them pictures of his right thigh! Eleventy!!!

    • 'NucksGal Says:

      I think you are all actually saying the same thing & not realizing. Let me know if I get it right.

      1) everyone has the right to their opinion, to like or dislike DC, TLM or any music

      2) everyone has the right to post their opinion in comments & blogs

      3) everyone is allowed to disagree with stated opinions & post/debate said comments & reviews

      4) it is NOT normal or ok to disagree in an insulting, childish, threatening, OTT, freak-out way. This is true whether you are violently hating the music or violently ‘defending’ the musician

      5) debate, discussion etc are good, fine, normal etc. Freaking out & threatening or insulting strangers for daring to disagree is sick & immature & makes you look like an idiot

      How’s that?

      • Fluffy Says:

        You forgot the punching in the face part. That’s how I deal with things.

        No, I think you’re right. Which is why I came here in the first place, lol. I was starved for sanity.

  23. Cooks_FUFL Says:

    Fluf–you are reading wayyy too much into my posts. Simply put–I tarded, I stopped, I can now look at him and his music more objectively. I could care less if fans post here or if you are a fan/tard. To be honest, I don’t know why I am wasting my time on this subject! Lol. This site was to laugh at the stupidity of tards (or so I thought). Did something change?

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      Yes. His crappy second album came out so the tards are currently horny.

    • Fluffy Says:

      Sorry I was so nitpicky and bitchy earlier. Should have just smacked my irritating husband upside his head and then my mood would have been better. Or I’d have a black eye. Either way. Not a tard, not horny over the album, sick of tards, wandered in here because it was funny and people seemed fairly sane.

  24. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    I think maybe sometimes some of us forget the purpose of this Free David Cook forum in the first place – I mean for me personally its a place where I can come, read, lurk, and occasionally post if I get the urge to on all thinks Cook-related. I am a self-professed “tard” if you will, yet, I am very careful for the most part to distance myself (where possible) from the OTT faction. I don’t FB, Tweet/Twitter, or even often post on DCO – I just like HIM. So sue me.

    As for TLM? Sadly, it turned out to be a letdown after all. Not sure if it was the label or something else. But for me, the opening promise of Circadian and the ending with REM, well the stuff in between was, at the end of the day just filler. IHATE those BCCs (read: Big cheesy chorouses) Okay one or two – but in 5, 6, or 7 songs David? No, just no). So No, tard though I be, I am NOT in love with this record. But as for seeing him mix them up in concert? Hell yeah! Can.Not.Wait. And am I turning in my Cooklandia Card Membership – uh noo. That’s not happening anytime soon either. My mantra remains – cooktardx10 (yes) but ixnay on the delusions…

    • Burt Says:

      OK I have to ask… what *is* the definition of a “tard”? Your description of yourself sounds very non-tardy to me. How far does one have to go to become a tard?

  25. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    Well Burt since you asked, I will try to explain. I do consider myself a “cooktard.” I (cringing to confess this) adore this guy. I love his voice, and from what I know of him (which is very little) I like who he is. I have met him twice. The first time he was not “on” as it were and was more than a little snarky and not what one would have expected from an “American Idol.” But I was totally cool with that; cuz we were encroaching (not me but my friend) on his personal space, he was not happy and was pretty snippy and yeah I am fine with that. The 2nd time, when he was “on” so to speak, he was awesome, everything a fangirl could want and more. But for me personally, I
    cannot and will not spend my waking hrs tweeting him,
    beseeching him to do this or that for me, follow me, come to my hometown in concert, love me, etc. Ughhhhhh. That just does not work. Blech. I admire him as an artist, whose music I like, but not (unfortunately)love, yet I plan to “support” him by buying it and yes, if he comes anywhere near my “catchment” area – I will go see him in concert and be very happy I did. Past that, what else can I do? I am not his mommy, his GF, or his secret fantasy lover and have no interest in any of that. I just like him so, what’s left, nothing, Im just a tard:( Hope that helps?

    • freedavidcook Says:

      As long as you haven’t put a tracker under his bus or photoshopped his head on a porn star or made him the center of your existence then you’re not true tard material..heheh

    • Fluffy Says:

      But did you stand on your chair and howl “I LOVE YOUUUU DAAAVVVIIIID?” while wearing earrings with his face on them? *That* is tardation at its finest.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Saw the earrings up close and personal once. Strange odd woman with those freaking things on. She was scuttling around the area near the Charlottesville Va venue all afternoon going in and out of the shops, buying nothing, looking very out of place. If I were him I’d have nightmares from her standing on the chair screaming out her love. Ugh.

      • Fluffy Says:

        She is a *little* too old to be standing on chairs howling πŸ™‚

      • freedavidcook Says:

        That’s “Grandma Earrings” alright!

      • Fluffy Says:

        Hahaha, yes. The only thing that might have compared horror-wise was the lady running around in what looked like a purple prom dress trying to shove her way up to the front. She was not prom-aged, either. I guess if you want to people watch… Idol males’ shows are the places to be?

      • Dani Says:

        My earring lady encounters were: on the sidewalk sitting behind her waiting for a show, and she dropped food, didn’t clean it up, and ants got all over our shit. Another show she ended up in the seat next to me wearing those trademark earrings. She is a sight.

  26. Black Angel Says:

    Or written any crazy fanfic crap. Or gotten on a plane to go to every single concert. Or try to contact his friends or family members. Or you tweet him nonstop. Or you keep wondering where he’s at and what he’s doing. You get excited when somebody has a sighting and you wanna know what he’s wearing. You spend hours on the tard fanboards and you get annoyed when real life calls.

    I’m sure there’s lots more fantard behavior.

    • Burt Says:

      This! To me, that kind of behavior is the definition of a tard. It’s the following him on tour, constantly tweeting him, making it your sole purpose to vote for him/raise awareness, thinking he’s the king of the world, listening to his music 24/7 kind of thing that defines it. In short, it’s the obsessive, crazy way people act.

      cooktardx10sansdelusions you sound like a keen fan. Which is what I consider myself to be – I think he seems like a nice guy from what I’ve seen, I like his music, I keep up with what he’s doing (career-wise that is, not, you know, stalking), I’m objective and I laugh/worry at the tard actions of the hardcore. That just makes a fan, right?

      So, what’s the story with your meeting when he wasn’t happy to see you? Just curious! Have to say he strikes me as someone who wouldn’t want to be interrupted during meals, time with friends/family etc but I thought he would at least be polite to people. I saw a video once of him being approached by girls playing a prank when he was in Best Buy (I think) and he was fine so maybe it depends on the situation and his mood on the day.

    • Ali Says:

      And they tweet his personal friends and also his mother Beth. Why?

      • Fluffy Says:

        The whole following his mom or dad, Neal or Andy’s girlfriend, etc. weirds me out. I just don’t get it.

      • burt Says:

        Ah yes, forgot about that! I don’t understand it either. I mean, I get that it’s a way to try “talk” to people who know him, but so what? Oh and I guess it’s to also pick up tidbits of news? I dunno, it weirds me out too.

        On a related note, I don’t understand creating Twitter lists containing the same people he follows. Why does anyone need to see Twitter as he sees it? I think that might just be my thing though seeing as Twitter now offers that for everyone! I just find it weird, no matter the person!

  27. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    Burt – Okay that meeting really lifted the blinders off as to who he really is as a private person – and pls don’t get me wrong – I do NOT blame him one bit and NO it has never affected the way I feel about him as an admitted fan, but wow! He was pissy! I won’t say what town it was in or exactly where, cuz I need to protect both me and my friend’s identity but it was outside a club he was playing at sometime in the spring of 2009 and we were waiting outside in the “lineup” at the venue. The 2 tour buses were already parked in the back behind the club. My friend and I decided to mosey on round just to see what was up. So we were just standing there on the sidewalk and who comes strolling along laden with shopping bags but DC and Ryan Star. My friend said, “OMG, I have to get his autograph for so and so” (another friend who wasnt there). I was mortified and said, “Ummm, maybe best to leave him be, he looks kind of grumpy.” Well, she said, “No I promised so and so I would get his autograph.” So she planted herself directly in his path and said, “Excuse me David” – she was very polite, but… I can still remember wanting to just disappear into the concrete sidewalk I was so embarrassed, cuz, I dunno. Its not something I would ever be so bold to do, but that’s just me…Anyway, I remember too he was wearing glasses!!! We were amongst the first to ever see him wearing those (so cute -sorry, minor tarding here)and flip flops! Ryan Star towered over him. Anyway, long story short, David was VERY snippy and snarky. Was very annoyed at being ‘accosted’ by a couple of fangirls..although he very begrudgingly granted my friend’s request. Then as he and RS were sauntering away, he just tossed off some comment, like “have a nice day” but in the most sarcastic manner ever! Yikes. Well she was infuriated with him, but me, eh, not so much. I could see his POV. Fans forget these are real people, not wind up automotons planted on Earth just for our amusement.

    We met him again after his show that evening and he could not have been more gracious, sweet and accommodating, it was total night and day. So,ever since then I have always been conscious of the fact that his public persona and the private self are two very different entities and therefore I harbor no delusions about what he really thinks of his fans; sure he “loves” us, but only in the sense that we buy his records and attend his shows, past that, it’s strictly hands off. I understand that and accept that reality 100%. What scares me is the hardcore tards have no such insight – they think they are part of his “tribe” and are are “his people” – cringe…Never gonna happen ladies.

    • Dani Says:

      I’ve had a similar experience as X10 mentioned, not as much snark personally directed at the few of us but still enough to let us all know that fans are NEVER going to be accepted into the inner sanctum. Yet when he’s got his “on stage” persona going on it’s all personality, humor and appreciation. Which is exactly why I love this place. It’s like a tard wake-up call. Maybe everyone should have this type of encounter and see the dark side of him. But so many seem to be turned on by angry Dave-they would never think his moodiness was directed at them.

  28. Rubber Ducky Says:

    Whoah. Someone expressed their own opinion? HOW DARE THEY!!! BURN THEM!!!!!

  29. Ali Says:

    sansdelusions, I actually was told about a few occassions when fans thought he was short with them or not so “appreciative”. But one of them actually said, they think he is a private person, so he may be a little put off with being accosted during his personal time. It may be something he struggles with, as the price of fame, and being a performer, which is what he wanted.

    • Fluffy Says:

      He reminds me very much of my brothers. Who are introverted and sometimes a bit pissy. Heh.

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      I lot of fans have in their heads a fantasy of their perfect fan encounter with their favorite celeb. People tend to forget celebs have the same unpleasant shit going on in their personal lives that we all do and maybe moseying to the back of a venue to accidentally run into them wouldn’t be met with joy, lol. I would probably snap and cut a bitch if I had to be “on” and super nice 24/7

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I don’t even have to be “on” at his shows and I’m always ready to cut a bitch (and always amazed that I haven’t yet), imagine how he feels.

      • Burt Says:

        Yeah, I meant to mention “personal stuff”. Aside from the usual crap we all have happening, he obviously had a lot going on in the past with his brother’s death and I always get the impression fans are keen to mention it. That must get difficult when you’re trying to cope and keep going. Not that I’m making excuses, just an observation, especially after I saw it mentioned in a fan question during an interview on the actual anniversary. Tact anyone? I do think if these fans had more or that, a little more respect and more skills to treat him like a normal man he wouldn’t be so detached sometimes. Not that these encounters had to be with those particular fans but if that’s what you are used to it’s bound to cloud your judgement. But maybe he was like that before, or he is just an awkward, moody guy at times – it’s allowed.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I met him once and he was very nice, and my husband and son met him at Race for Hope last year and he was very nice there, too (he seems to be great with kids, my son thought he was awesome lol). That said, we were super respectful and didn’t ask him for anything, just said hi, and we pretty randomly ran into him rather than seeking him out.

      • Black Angel Says:

        I met him once at the Idol concert meet and greet. He seemed really nice to me. I remember I didn’t know what to say to him, so I blurted out, “I can’t wait for your cd” and he said, “I can’t wait either”. How cute is that? I remember all the young girls were screaming for him and he had a look on his face of sheer terror. I don’t think he was prepared for all the attention, but I’m not sure how anyone could be prepared for that.

  30. burt Says:

    Thanks for the story sansdelusions. Interesting too that Ali has heard the same kind of stories – I guess he’s not as approachable as I thought! Interesting to hear that he has those two sides – everyone seems to say that he’s so nice so I assume he’s not false when he is OK because that often shows through? Plus there was the Youtube I saw (the Best Buy prank) where he was fine – did anyone else see that by the way?

    I can only assume he gets pissed at being interrupted during his downtime and I have to say, I wouldn’t be pleased either. As a “normal person” I understand why people want to approach “celebrities” but I also appreciate how annoying it must be and some people just aren’t considerate. Imagine if it happens on the one day off you have a week or it’s the one hour you have time alone. Plus, just imagine the sort of conversations he must have with his hardcore pack of fans – that would be enough to put anyone off!

    And yes, maybe he just struggles with that side of things. I don’t envy anyone in that position, all the kissing, hugging and being nice on days when I’m in a bad mood would annoy me too! Maybe that’s why he’s such a homebody.

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      I think we all have two sides. Sometimes we’re more open to social interaction than other times. I think David is simply not perfect…shocking, I know, lol. He’s a normal human being who has his good and bad days. Doesn’t make him a phony ( and I know that’s not what you’re saying, Burt…just speaking or err writing in general).

      Can you imagine having to deal with the likes of that Daina tard who wrote that ridiculous twitlonger to Cook about how she couldn’t get extended face time with him at the Best Buy cd release and was pushed along so that the other 200 or whatever people in line could get their cd’s signed. The man deserves whatever private time away from those loons he can get.

      • Burt Says:

        …wait! What? He. Is. Not. Perfect? Huh? I do not understand. I just can’t believe it. How can you say such a thing? You cannot be a real fan if you think badly of him. πŸ˜‰

    • WilcoisAwesome Says:

      ALso, I don’t think I saw the video of the Best Buy prank…never even heard it occurred? anyone have a link?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I wouldn’t even know how to look it up. It’s not from his CD release. He was shopping at Best Buy and some girls pranked him and said “Aren’t you David Archuleta?” and he was really nice about it. That was a long time ago, I wouldn’t know how to search it out on youtube.

      • burt Says:

        I looked but couldn’t find it – all those videos from the album release make it pretty hard now, especially when I can’t remember what the video was called! It was a while ago that I saw it so it could have been removed too.

        As Nonna said he was good about it even though he was waiting in line with Andrew minding his own business. He said he wasn’t Archuleta but that he was David Cook and he shook their hand too I think. I’d forgotten about it until the stories of him being a bit off when people approached him in his down time.

  31. Amusedbyfandom Says:


    LOL, Us normal “bad” fans are the best fans, if I say so myself : )

  32. Jen Says:

    Speaking of talking to people he knows…

    So Kira is doing some kind of makeup tutorial tonight. With our good pal Bonnie and probably Kelly and Glengirl4DC (she of the grandma age and Analog Heart tattoo) was invited too.

    Seems pretty damn creepy and inappropriate to me.

    • Dani Says:

      If it means draining them of some cash I suspect they would be welcome.

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      The lengths some of these people will go to to be in the “inner circle” of David and his friends is kinda astounding. I get the feeling Kira knows what’s up but these weirdos go see perform and buy the god-awful cheesy hair bows/accessaries she sells on Esty, so it’s a win-win for her.

      On a different note, Kira tweeted a pic of her bare ass last week and the usual suspects were all “You’re beautiful”, “what a great pic”. Can you imagine the viciousness that would be directed to a woman who was dating David if she were to do something like that.

      • Dani Says:

        I’m still waiting for that sex tape to surface. 90% of the fandom would probably spontaneously combust.

      • Fluffy Says:

        LOL, just a *girlfriend* would make some waves, much less a sex tape. I am afraid the reactions to a sex tape would range from aghast to vomit-worthy. The “fanbase” thread people would be in heaven! (Oh, the places to innocently wander on DCO – I wanted to pluck out my eyes).

    • nonna-muss Says:

      So, while some of them were buying stuff from Kira last night (heh, I don’t blame Kira, cows are for milking after all) did anyone notice that Zoo wasn’t there? Guess why! She flew to Tulsa for Neal’s show. W.T.F.????

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Interesting Nonna, Zoo is one of those fans that are always chiding other fans for being all about David. Who travels out of state to watch a guitarist play. TARD. Wonder what Neal thought looking out into the audience and seeing her face again, lol

      • Jen Says:

        Wow. Yeah, other fans know Zoo takes every opportunity to put down David, even on his own website. Everyone else is better than him.

      • Ali Says:

        Nonna Neal has some of the creepiest tards and you know Kira is all into milking them for all its worth! She really doesn’t have a real job, and is always talking about being broke haha. My 10 year old daughter is also making those same bows, and jewelry on etsy haha…and they are way better! I imagine she and the pretentious, song writing Neal are laughing there naked asses off at these tards! They are all hypocrites…just trying to get in that inner sanctum lmao!

  33. Karen D Says:

    Oh, the girlfriend exists and people have found her. Not too long before everyone knows.

    • Fluffy Says:

      It’s kinda fun to watch the Twitter feed when the girlfriend rumors start to appear. I always am hoping the “Oh my god, tell me that’s not true, my heart is broken!” tweets are from teens and not older women but I never have the balls to check…

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      Hmmm….do tell Karen. No not really, lol. I have an idea who she might be but the guy deserves a private life and God knows the girlfriend doesn’t deserve to have crazy fans launching a CIA like investigation into her life.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Fluffy, I’ve braved his twitter timeline a few times on those very occasions…and… some are indeed teen girls and some are definitely not. Older women up in arms over a man young enough to be their son having a girlfriend and OMG having s.e.x is not a pretty sight or those with sensitive gag reflexes.

    • burt Says:

      I have to ask because I’m curious – how can they have “found” someone so well hidden? Of course there can be suspicions but I don’t see how they can know for sure? Also, what makes you say “not long before everyone knows”? Is someone threatening to spill the details? (I know this shows I’m not up with the gossip but I don’t visit any forums and have no contact with the Twitter hardcores.)

      I’m vaguely curious because I’ve suspected there was someone for a while – not in the “he’s missing from Twitter, he must be having a sex session somewhere” kind of way just that he’s a normal guy and he seems increasingly awkward when asked if he’s single. I’ve only caught the rumors on Twitter a couple of times. I can never work out how they start but the reaction is fun. And no, they aren’t all teens. Even if he has someone though, and even if it’s out in the open, we all know the kind of crap she will get, plus he’s about to go on a massive tour so that’s going to give plenty of chances for them to question how serious/committed/blah/blah the relationship is.

      I do lol at the lengths people go to try to connect with people he knows. I know the fans have no awareness of how it looks and I know the friends get things out of it but it just seems a bit… I dunno. I just feel a bit sorry for David. If they’re so desperate to know him maybe they should not be so weird so he wants to at least talk to them at shows. That would be a good place to start. He does have to want to be friends with someone, or at least trust them enough to be in the inner circle but then these people seem a bit naive to that fact.

      Oh and are you talking a David sex tape or a Kira/Neal sex tape?

      I’m *confused* all round today. Help!

      • Fluffy Says:

        Heh, it all sounded very dire, didn’t it? “Not too long before everyone knows.”

      • burt Says:

        Yeah totally. Like it’s a big countdown. It can only be spilled by him or fans that “know” (taking paparazzi out of the equation because we have no idea what they do/don’t know or intentions). As he’s been asked a lot recently and said nothing, I don’t see why he would suddenly confess, which only leaves the fans to spill. In which case, why haven’t they already? Why are they keeping it a secret until “soon”. Do *they* have a big leak planned? Don’t. Get. It.

        Not an attack on anyone, it just seems a bit “we know something you don’t but we’re keeping it secret to protect them… until it suits us”. Or something.

      • Fluffy Says:

        It’s weird. I don’t know if it is “We’re not telling so we can ‘protect’ him” or “We’re not telling so we have something that makes us special-er than those not in the know” or what, it’s puzzling. Don’t care who his girlfriend is, but the neverending fascination with it is… hmm. I don’t follow anyone on Twitter who even speculates so I guess I’m where I need to be haha.

      • Fluffy Says:

        Picturing a Kim Johnson or whatever her name was sort of “leak” – bathrobe pictures! Cougar! Oh noes! And giggling a bit. Granted, I had 3 hours of sleep but… still giggling.

      • burt Says:

        I don’t care either, just intrigued with the fan side of it I guess. I’ve actually seen vague mention of it going back a long time ago on Twitter just from reading his replies – so is this a long relationship, a different woman or did the fans have it wrong? For me the main thing is how they could know for sure when there’s been no photos, no comments from anyone and he keeps his life very closed off. Sure you can stalk people on Twitter, look at who follows who, who is mentioned in tweets and come to conclusions but it’s always going to be conclusions until he admits it. And let’s all be honest here, none of us know what he’s planning because we’re NOT in his inner circle and he’s very guarded.

        As I have no contact with any other fans aside from here I’m in the dark about a lot of stuff. I kind of like it that way but when people make comments that sound almost threatening I can’t help but question fan’s intentions. And by the way, am I the only one who finds the “we’re protecting him” attitude almost as scary as the “attack” mentality because protection often seems to come with a “while it suits us, or until you annoy us” mentality. Maybe I’m reading too much into it all…

      • Fluffy Says:

        Oh, it’s all fascinating to me. The level of investment… and the amount of work needed to super-secretly uncover this girlfriend…

        I find the protecting him thing really odd unless you’re his friends and family πŸ™‚

      • burt Says:

        Yep me too Fluffy – so much investment! I barely have time to come here and talk. I can’t imagine how much time people put into him, his career, his secret life, friends, family. I wonder if the protectiveness is an age thing, or like they think they know him so well they want to protect him like they would family/friends?

        The other thing about the girlfriend thing is that even if he is with someone/people, and they’ve been “together” for a while it doesn’t mean it’s serious. Maybe it’s just “fun” that’s keeping him busy til he hits the road. I have no idea (obviously) but it’s wrong for fans to assume it’s serious enough for everyone to know about “soon”. And if they’re not assuming and inside information is being given out then I really feel even more sorry for him.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I’ve heard about this. It’s weaved its way through the fans secretly. So what if he has a girlfriend? I don’t know why it’s anyone’s business but his and hers. Why can’t these people get a life and stay out of his? Annoying.

      • sodagrape Says:

        I hope he has a girlfriend. And I hope he proudly takes her out in public, if that’s what he wants. He shouldn’t have to live his life as a recluse out of concern about what the nutjobs might say or do.

        I just hope this possible girlfriend knows what she’s getting into. The bashing of Kim and Lana was just disgusting and embarrassing, and I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

      • Dani Says:

        Burt, I meant a David sex tape. Neal/Kira would make me gag, probably cause I do not find Neal attractive/hot whatsoever. David on the other hand, yes. With or without above mentioned girlfriend.

      • Burt Says:

        With you on the Neal thing, sure he’s a nice guy but, no. Anyway even with David… ew! I might be unusual but I don’t ever feel the need to see anyone’s sex tape and it’s worse if it’s someone I like. I don’t know why – I just have no desire to see it all. Does that mean I’m definitely not a tard? I can’t even imagine their reaction to such a sight!

        Anyway, I hope that he’s not stupid enough to ever do it let alone for it to be released – it kinda worries me that celebrities still do it and then get annoyed when they get released. Don’t take the risk, people it only makes you look dumb later on! And all kinds of other things depending on the contents of the tape.

    • Cooks_FUFL Says:

      Sounds like a DCU post, Karen D. Sorry, but it does…why even bother posting that? Does the D stand for DirtyDiana? LOL

      • Karen D Says:

        Nope, not DirtyDiana. LOL I have no intention of posting any details. Yes, it’s a definite. Yes it’s been long term. The reason I say everyone will know soon is that a large group of people just found out and none of them will keep their mouths shut. Burt, just because you haven’t seen pictures, doesn’t mean they don’t exist. They do! I’m not trying to tease, I just said that there is a girlfriend. Personally, I WANT to see the fandom meltdown that results from it. Maybe some of them will wake up and realize that they aren’t his demographic, girlfriend-wise.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        The fan meltdown will be most amusing….

      • Jen Says:

        How did that large group of people find out? Pictures? Seeing him out with someone? Just curious. And wait – how do you know the details?

      • Fluffy Says:

        Oh, boy, does that mean people will freak out and say he took so long to make this record because of this girlfriend and hate her for it?

        Maybe she’ll be classy. Snort.

      • SeenTheLight Says:

        I can tell you for certain, Karen is the real deal. She knows what she is talking about. And no, I’m not her on another name. I can’t go into any other details about how she is legitimate as it’s not my place to do so. You just never know who may be around. As for the girlfriend, it’s been out there for a while and many fans have already speculated about her so it’s bound to get out soon enough. Especially since there are fans who can’t keep information to themselves & will spread it around soon enough to make themselves look important in the fandom.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        That poor girl. She has no idea the drubbing she’s in for after this leaks.

      • Rubber Ducky Says:

        Poor Yoko.

  34. Black Angel Says:

    If he does have a girlfriend, I think he should keep it a secret. Too many crazies out there.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      All I ask is if this mystery lady exists please no posting of her name/age/job title/etc here. No links to anything involving here, nothing about her twitter feed. This lady needs to be completely anonymous here.

      We don’t need to feed the ugly trolls. Plus I hope the poor guy does have a girlfriend. He’s entitled to privacy in that part of his life at least. After Lana Jade I’m sure anyone brave enough or foolhardy enough to date him must know about the crazy assed insano fantards.

      • Fluffy Says:

        After seeing the crap that went on at that scary DCU place with posting pics of anyone who even might almost be sorta kinda involved with him… yeah, definitely, I’m all for this girl to be anonymous until she chooses to not be. Because yikes some of these people…

  35. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    We’re talking about a 28-year-old heterosexual male here right? Of course he has girlfriend. He is obviously (off stage) a very private person so having said GF he’s not talking about is no different than any other aspect of his life which he has been keeping to himself and under the radar for the last 2 years. Good for him! He’s smart cuz he knows the crazies will tear apart anyone he even looks at or good forbid, even sitting beside some woman in public is risky. I feel really bad for him that way – maybe if his record had done better, he would have said, oh screw it, here she is, but as it is, he needs every overinvested, pre and postmenopausal,delusional hen in his fan arsenal to continue to support him – as long as they continue to believe that somehow he’s available and attainable, they aren’t going anywhere. Sick.

  36. Cooks_FUFL Says:

    Wait, KarenD…do you mean that Daina Fullmer or LadyNSearch Vicki or any of the grandmas that LURVE him are NOT his girlfriend?????? OMG…say it isn’t so!!!!! *Shock, awe, sadness* LMAO!! πŸ™‚

    • Fluffy Says:

      The roses will wither on the vine, lol.

      • cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

        Too bad the “Weeds” won’t be so easy to eradicate though – they never are.

      • Fluffy Says:

        Heh, true. That whole weeds vs. roses thing… People need new hobbies or something.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        You know, maybe folks will be mature and respectful. I mean seriously, can anyone be shocked that a 28 yr old man has a girlfriend. ( yes, I’m laughing as I type this).

        I’ve always felt bad for David that the guys in the band could be open about their GF’s but after Caldwell ( spunky girl-I liked her) David had to be discrete.

        Guess I follow the wrong fans, only heard he has a girlfriend, no details, pics, etc. Or maybe I follow the right ones πŸ™‚

      • Fluffy Says:

        Isn’t it nuts that there’s angst and despair over a 28 year old man having a girlfriend? I guess he’s supposed to be a monk πŸ™‚ I wonder if it’s different tard-wise for the married Idols like Kris and Daughtry and Bo, etc.

      • burt Says:

        lol Amused, I think your hope of them being respectful might be misplaced!

        Karen – I wasn’t doubting that pictures exist or anything like that, I just struggle to believe his fans are capable of keeping anything quiet. And I know the press just don’t care unless they’re paid off. I also wasn’t doubting you that there was someone just saying that it’s hard for us to know the true nature of the relationship and whether he would choose to put that out there. Fair enough that you apparently have inside info somehow but we weren’t to know that hence my doubt. Hope that clears it up!

        Anyway, clearly the fans can’t keep it quiet – just that they’ve done it all under the radar except for the few random comments I’ve seen. I almost (almost, I’m not crazy!) regret not having anything to do with any of them – I have to admit I’m curious. And if we can’t mention details here (very wise), how will I ever know? How will I ever live? I joke, I joke…

        The reaction to this and the tour in general is going to be amazing to watch. Poor guy, so much pressure. I hope he is happy (obviously) – everyone deserves to be but I can’t help but feel there’s going to be trouble somewhere down the line.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Do you know he has fans that think he’s single and that because he’s single that that means he’s celibate?? One of them was questioned on why she thought he was single and she said “because he said so, angels don’t lie”. I.Kid.You.Not.

        This was over the winter, can’t remember which one of the crazies said it. Obviously I was dumbfounded.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        I guess the roses and weeds expect him to have a blow up doll or a Real Doll in the closet with one of their faces or a series of masks of their faces to do with that thing….

      • Burt Says:

        Oh Nonna, that’s so funny! An angel? Wow. And yet I’m not surprised.

        It’s a weird thing and I’m not sure how it should be (aside from people not being obsessive and batshit, I’m sure of that!). I remember not too long ago (during promotion for the album maybe) he was asked what qualities he looks for in a woman and he reeled off a list. He was then asked if he’d found said woman and said “no”. With that kind of answer I can see why they thought he was single. I kinda choose to believe him, as I do mostly in life because I don’t like to think people I like are lying in interviews, mostly because I hate lies regardless of the situation. I’m not even a hardcore fan so I can imagine they believe everything he says with complete faith. I didn’t totally fall for it given that he also spent time avoiding the “are you single?” question but I guess I put that down to either a new relationship or one(s) that weren’t serious. I get that he’s protecting things but at the same time, maybe he has been misleading people a little and so I won’t be surprised if they are annoyed when they find out. This is in advance so maybe they will be OK with it and nothing excuses crazy behavior, I can just understand why they would be annoyed.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Burt , I have to disagree with you a little. If he hasn’t been all the forthcoming about the details of his dating life, no big deal to me. I really don’t consider that lying. The hate spewed towards k.Caldwell would any man more protective of any future relationship.People really have no right to be annoyed by something that’s not any of their business anyway.

        I kinda look at it as being similar to celebs that are rumored to be pregnant and deny it, then admit it when it can’t be hidden anymore. Most women just don’t want to announce their pregnancies until they’re past the danger of miscarriage. Maybe not the best analogy but there you go, lol.

      • Burt Says:

        Oh I wasn’t saying that I didn’t understand why he would do it. I totally do – he’s had enough happen that he would want to be protective. (And I also think it’s totally wrong when the media start reporting personal things before people are ready to confirm it).

        I’m running on not much sleep so let me try to explain again… All I mean is I can see how they choose to believe EVERYTHING he says – but not because he’s an angel. That’s just freaky shit Just that I’m a bit like that in life (if it’s a trustworthy person, I’m not naive) and I think some of a fan/artist relationship is based on honesty. These are very invested people too so they take it all way more seriously than us. I don’t think he’s been outright lying necessarily just that sometimes he may have said things that were misleading – like the example I gave, that sort of gave the impression he was single while at the same time avoiding the question in other interviews or saying “dating is complicated”. I think that if he wants to avoid that subject he would be better to have an agreement that interviewers can’t raise it but as it was he was being vague and potentially misleading. It’s not that it’s any of my business, or theirs, and it’s not that I really care (aside from being mildly curious today) I was just saying that I could sort of see how they could feel lied to if it turns out he has been in a relationship for a while when he was choosing to answer questions about it.

        Does that make it clearer? Probably not!

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Clear as mud Burt, LOL. Just kidding. I get what you’re saying. The looney tunes will feel lied to even though Cook’s intention may be to simply protect someone he cares for from public scrutiny.

  37. Cooks_FUFL Says:

    If this is too nosy, please feel free to remove it FDC. But I admit, I am just curious if it is NYE girl. No matter who it is, GOOD for him if he is happy, GOOD for him keeping it quiet, and I wonder if he will lose some batshit fans over this.

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      If a girlfriend rids him of the bat shit crazies then I she may be the greatest person in the world to me. πŸ˜‰

      • Fluffy Says:

        She can be the queen. Slayer of weeds and roses. Hail!

      • burt Says:

        Do we really think it will happen though? I honestly can’t see them going anywhere. I mean they stuck around through other relationships and we’ve all had an inkling there was someone now and deep down I’m sure they knew too. Why is this situation any different to when he was dating Kim C for example? I just don’t see him ever losing them. Ever.

        And this is all if they do somehow leak it. But what if they do and he or the girlfriend still don’t confirm it? That’s the part I wonder about – will he (or they, if she’s famous) actually admit it and open the floodgates?

      • Fluffy Says:

        Maybe he can be like Matt Nathanson and just steadfastly NOT talk about his personal life… even if he gets married. I had no idea that dude is in his mid-30’s or so and is married. And I’m a pretty big fan (though clearly don’t get a tard card since I don’t know *enough*).

      • burt Says:

        He is? I had no idea either but I’ve only listened to the music and not looked into his personal life so hardly surprising. Interesting that he keeps up a constant twitter feed without revealing his life though – maybe David can learn from him. I’m now wondering if that’s why he backed away from it a little.

        I just feel that with David it’s a bit late because his career started and he picked the fans up first. I could be wrong but I get the feeling he can be as quiet as he wants but the fans will still talk. That being said, I’ve said for a while that he’s one of those people that I expect to suddenly find out that he’s not only with someone but married to her with a kid.

        I’m starting to feel as bad as the hardcore though, the more this discussion goes on the more curious I am. Can someone, somehow, hook a non-batshit fan up with the info in a non-public manner? God, I didn’t really just ask that… see, this is what secrecy does! It creates more interest. It’s a very bad thing sometimes.

      • Sosueme Says:

        I know how you feel. What is wrong with me? I like to think that i respect the guy’s privacy, so why do I suddenly want to know all the gory details? Please don’t feed my sick curiousty…

      • Burt Says:

        Ha! I’m glad I’m not alone. I love this place for making me feel normal. Well almost anyway!

        It’s really weird for me to be interested and yet I am. I have no idea why.

  38. burt Says:

    And damn, I’ve just realized this means NYC Twitter girl is out of luck with her date. I was looking forward to seeing how that played out – details of the date all over her timeline etc. πŸ˜‰

    • Sosueme Says:

      Hahaha. Her propositions were strangely adorable. She’s totally batshit crazy of course, but at least she’s young and attractive. The kind of tard a guy like cook can be proud of. Every wannabe rocker needs his groupies…

      • Burt Says:

        Yeah they were and she is. I did admire that she put herself out there like that – I never would even if I wanted too. It’s just easy to laugh when she’s also talking about stalking him. πŸ™‚

  39. Amusedbyfandom Says:

    Nonna “angels don’t lie”

    Bwahhhha, OMG, you almost made me snort sweet tea up my nose!
    To a normal person single=not married, not joined a monastery. Oy to the vey!

    Fluffy, I don’t know about Bo or Kris but I remember Daughtry called out his fans on twitter for trying to rip his wedding ring off his finger during a concert and disrespecting his wife. I don’t think it’s just an Idol thing. A few years ago, Trent Reznor (as far from Idol as you can get) of Nine Inch Nails went on the fan forum of the the official NIN site and laid into fans for the nasty comments they were posting on the forum about his then girlfriend (now wife). It got really ugly. Every fandom it seems has it’s OTT nuts.

  40. Jessie Says:

    Haven’t been here in a while, but can somebody tell me when exactly this site morphhed into DCU. I feel like I’m in the girlfriends thread. Same modus operandi as well. Someone comes in and says he has a girlfriend, they know all the details, but it’s super duper secret so they can’t share them. Then another person comes and posts that the original poster is legimate, knows what they’re talking about etc. but of course won’t give out any details. I thought this was a site to make fun of his over the top tards, not to talk about his personal life.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      Jessie, well, that’s another reason why I’m not allowing details to be shared in the comments. Unlike Mary Ann/Holly I actually like to respect other peoples privacy. There’s been the gf rumor for a long time and no one knows if it’s legitimate. I’m certainly never going to waste time writing about it unless a tard takes a stupid action towards this possible gf. Then it’s fair game. Everyone is speculating but there’s not going to be the DCU shenanigans.

    • Burt Says:

      You know despite my curiosity, I see your point Jessie. My interest is out of character (true of other people here too) so I think it’s not so much that I want to know details but more if it is true. I have no reason to doubt Karen or SeenTheLight but at the same time, I don’t know them or anything about them either to know it’s the truth. Maybe someone else does? I can see how you think what you do, I still struggle to believe that a group of fans knew something and kept it to themselves while another side were in the dark and only just found out but they’re not talking about it either – at lest not publicly. The whole thing is weird to me but then that’s almost my signature phrase when talking about David and his fans!

      From my point of view, although I am a little curious (I thought the gossip rag reader in me was long gone!) I’m more interested in how everyone reacts to it. The relationship between fan and artist is interesting to me and it’s those dynamics I’m thinking about more.

      • Jessie Says:

        Sorry Burt if you thought my post was directed at you specifically. It wasn’t. And curiosity is just human nature. It’s just some of the threads on DCU were quite sickening and I was glad when it was finally brought down. (thank you FDC). I`m quite certain that David Cook does have a girlfriend. At least I hope he does. I`m also certain that when it is finally out in the open there will be plenty to talk and laugh about because let`s face it there are more than a few fans who aren`t going to take it very well.

      • Burt Says:

        That’s OK Jessie, I didn’t think it was aimed at me. Just me chiming in! It’s been an odd day here because it’s not often we discuss rumors about his personal life – this kind of came from nowhere (in a sort of not really kind of way) and I hate contributing to it really so I just felt I should justify why I was.

        I don’t know if he has a girlfriend/had a girlfriend/how long he’s been with anyone but I definitely don’t think he’s living life like a monk. That’s just crazy. I don’t necessarily hope he has a girlfriend (I don’t necessarily wish that for anyone by the way!) but I do hope that whatever situation he’s in, that he’s happy.

      • 'NucksGal Says:

        IF she exists – and IF they choose to go public – someone should direct her over here to read the history of what fans did to the poor previous women.

        Forewarned is forearmed.

      • Burt Says:

        Speaking of which… FDC, did you ever finish telling all those stories? I remember you got weary of it but they were interesting reading for people like me who missed it all as it happened. Now might be a good time to continue. πŸ˜‰

        ‘NucksGal – I’m sure if anyone is dating him/has dated him they are/were aware of it otherwise they would find it really strange that he doesn’t want to be seen with them and doesn’t ever mention them. Although earlier it was implied that there are photos of them so maybe he is seen with them and they’re not as careful as we think – in which case IF she exists, maybe she’s not scared at all. *shrug*

    • SeenTheLight Says:

      I apologize, Jessie, if it seemed like I was veering into DCU territory by vouching for Karen. That was not my intent. I’ve just seen too many people who really are legitimate and do know what they are talking about be chased away from other message boards simply by not going into express detail about their connections, how they know the information they do or not sharing information they have been privvy to with the Cooktards. My only intention was just to let everyone know that I, personally, know she is legit. She may not know my identity on here but she has talked to me previously before and I am aware of her legitimacy. Just because there are people out there that are fans of David that do have legitimate information, it doesn’t mean they’re going out in the fandom and spreading the information. hey do know how to keep their mouths shut and the information to themselves unlike the tards that are made fun of on here on a regular basis. The Cook fandom is a toxic environment and any little rumor spreads like wildfire even if it’s not true. Those who know the truth keep quiet, sit back and enjoy the outcome and don’t take part in fueling the fire. This forum is a place to discuss the tards, not morph into DCU and begin discussing personal details about him or anyone who might know him.

      Whether or not, the information about him being in a relationship ever does come out, regardless of what the tards publicly say, they will have a meltdown. It’s been slowly picking up the past few months with comments about how he’s their boyfriend, no one will be as good enough as they are for him and how their lives will be ruined once they find out he is dating someone. These are not young spring chickens either but fans who are around his mom’s age. There was a situation that occurred at the album release meet & greet where a poster named YoSwanny went up to David and told him that she spoke for the fandom, that it was okay for him to have a girlfriend and how the fans just wanted him to be happy. The person who relayed this story to me who was also in the room at the time said he kept telling her “I’m happy” but she kept repeating what she said before. Apparently, she posted about it on her twitter feed and got castrated by some in the fandom for saying that to him.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Wow, kinda speechless at that info. I had no idea as a Cook fan that I had a spokesperson. Good grief, the nerve. Talk about inappropriate on so many levels. How he doesn’t tell some of these people to fuck off is beyond me.

      • Fluffy Says:

        If we’re going to have a spokesperson I at least want to VOTE for them… Groupspeak FTW.

      • Jessie Says:

        Is it just me or does anybody else wonder how some of them managed to get out of their straightjackets.
        They actually make me embarrassed to be a Cook fan.

      • Burt Says:

        Good to know we fans have a spokesperson! I hope she did a tour of all sites, including here, to get our opinions first. To be fair, her message wasn’t far off from what most of us think (i.e. it’s OK to have a girlfriend and we want him to be happy) but there’s a difference between thinking it and saying it to him, let alone having the nerve to give permission for him to live like a normal man.

        He must have had some great training to deal with these people.

        So if she got into trouble from fans does this mean we have a new spokesperson, or is the position vacant? I might throw my name into the mix just to liven things up! πŸ˜‰

      • Fluffy Says:

        I’ll vote for you, Burt. Burt! Burt! Burt! You can be the Moss Party or something. Something non-weed/rose. Kudzu? Or is that a weed?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Yo Swanny doesn’t speak for me! She’s a fucking wacko too. Normal fans don’t need anyone to speak for them. Normal fans just get their CD signed and say thank you/congratulations and move on. Normal fans don’t give a rat’s ass if he has a girlfriend or is dating the entire KC Chiefs cheerleading squad. Normal fans go to shows and leave when the show is over and don’t stand outside a bus for an hour or stalk every bar in town looking for him. Normal fans, if they meet him, say they enjoy his music, it was nice meeting him, the show was great. Who in the fuck thinks they can tell him it’s OK to have a girlfriend??? He’s a grown man, he can do whatever the hell he pleases and does not need anyone’s approval or permission.

        Do you see why these people irritate the shit out of me??

      • Jen Says:

        Holy crap! And I always thought YoSwanny was fairly sane and reasonable.

      • Burt Says:

        I just makes me wonder what’s going on in their heads. Like we’ve all said, if you think it then fine – we can all judge but everyone has odd stuff in their heads sometimes. But there’s just such a difference between thinking and saying it. I can only hope that her message came across as misunderstood but it seems doubtful if she repeated the same thing. Good for him to just reply that “he’s happy” without saying anything more. That had to be annoying for her. πŸ˜€

      • just don't get it Says:

        believe me, I don’t think she should have
        spoken “for the fandom”, but I truly don’t
        think she mean’t any harm. Sounds to me like
        she was just trying to tell him not to stress
        over the OTT fans and just live his life and be
        happy – there are worse things she could have
        said imo.

  41. Ali Says:

    Wow. All I can say to David is “go on take the money and run”!!!!! Seriously he has made more money than he could have ever imagined in his life. And he enjoys his private life, though I get he also loves to perform…but after the failure of this cd, and having to put up with all the bsc fans who “own” him, I’m thinking he should invest wisely, maybe commit to a song writing career, and just go underground…until the tards spontaneously combust lol.

    He needs to just say “fuck you old hags, leave me alone and this is my woman”…then just go away for a bit.

  42. Thought I better roll this out just in case this “announcement” falls through.
    Pens at the ready?

    From DCO 26 November 2009

    David Cook Girlfriend Application

    Raise your right hand and place your left on your David Cook CD and repeat after me: By submitting this application, I herby certify that I am of sound body and unsound mind, and I am applying for this position solely for laughs, because David asked for it, so help me David Cook.

    First Name

    Actual Age:

    Age (age you feel thanks to DC’s influence – not actual age)

    Marital Status

    β€œPosition” applied for:

    by his side (girlfriend)
    under him (groupie)
    over him (dominatrix)
    behind him (dog-sitter)
    in front of him (bodyguard)
    other (please specify):

    Are you qualified? Name 3 reasons David should β€œhire” you for the position:




    List any special skills you have that may be relevant to this position [please keep it PG-13!]:

    What would be your dream date with David entail?

    Can he win you over with just a kiss on the neck? Y / N
    If not, what would it take?

    Would you be willing to have David’s babies? Y / N
    Taking into consideration that DC babies would have GIANT heads, what do you say now? Y / N

    Do you like dogs? Y / N
    If no, justify why you should still be considered for the position:

    Do you like mustard? Y / N
    If yes, justify why you should still be considered for the position:

    David is a Word Nerd. Talk nerdy to him: tell him what your favorite word is and why:

    What is your favorite movie quote?

    What would you do for Klondike bar?

    When you hear “giggity giggity” you think…

    How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

    What is your favorite superpower?
    A) The ability to… um… walk? Wait, no. That’s not right.
    B) Singing like a rock star.
    C) Air guitar!
    D) I would like to be able to hear things.
    E) Other:

    If we were ever to live together, where would you shop for furniture?

    A) At Target, of course.
    B) At Tarzhay.
    C) I would make it for you from scratch using only my teeth.
    D) I don’t believe in furniture. I only own carpeting.
    E) Other:

    Does David Cook fart?
    A) Duh! Of course he farts!
    B) No. He is perfect. He never farts and if he did it would smell like roses.
    C) Yes. But he farts magic rainbows.
    D) Other:

    How would you fend off “overzealous” groupies and fans?
    A) With a stick.
    B) I would just send them over to (select one): Neal / Andy / Kyle / Joey
    C) You’re on your own, buddy– I’d run away.
    D) Other:

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Don’t think they didn’t give them to him, because they did.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Please note the guy saying “Oh my gosh, good luck with that.” The guys must have got their drunk on and laughed for hours.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Damn, speechless again…I might need to get my drunk on too. Lordy!

      • Burt Says:

        (Combining lots of responses in one so I don’t spam the comments again!)

        WOW. I know (ahem, hope) it was only a bit of fun but wow. The fun those guys must have laughing at fans.

        I don’t even know where to start with the questions but lol at the baby one. I do love how these fans like to point out his “faults” at any given opportunity – it’s not just his friends/family that keep him grounded with them reminding him of stuff like his big skull all the time.

        Such a contradiction there too in the “positions” and then “special skills… keep it PG-13”. πŸ˜€

        I have a question… surrounded by so much crazy, does David Cook really know and appreciate that there are normal fans out there? Fans who think like normal, rational humans? It must be pretty easy for him to forget we exist.

        I’ve also been thinking about putting my name forward and well, I’m reconsidering because it will mean speaking for the tards too. I couldn’t have a conversation with him and keep a straight face calling him all those names (like I’d just want to talk about music, TV, movies and stuff… god forbid). Although, I’d have fun conveying Nonna’s messages. I’ll think about it overnight. πŸ˜‰

        Ali – it ain’t gonna happen! Aside from the album not actually being a failure, why should he give up performing if it’s what he enjoys? Even if the whole girlfriend saga from today isn’t true (I’m starting to think I’ll never know as I don’t talk to the right people!) it has to be true that he has had relationships of some kind and managed to keep them quiet and trouble free so my guess is he’s coping just fine.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Burt, The cray cray is loud unfortunately but small in number so I think he does know that sane fans exist and are the majority. See my post earlier about Trent Reznor and some nuts in his fandom. The focus on this site is Idols but all artists (musicians, actors, athletes etc.) have their loons that should have some sense shaken into them.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Can anyone see the vid?? It was working when I posted it but it’s telling me now that the youtube account has been closed for that video!! Hahahaha. Awwww, too bad. It was funny. Of course he’s kind about it, but I can’t help but laugh at his face because it seemed like he was holding back an uproarious laughing jag.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Nonna, you broke the internets again! Ha~

  43. Ali Says:

    Ha Nonna I can’t see the vid, but I think I may have seen it years ago? And Burt, it was a joke. Dave can do whatever the hell he wants to do, he’s a grown up. But if I were him, with his bsc fans, I would “take the money and run!” ;D

  44. SeenTheLight Says:

    Try this one:

    The girlfriend application video is cringe-worthy as it is but if you really want a good laugh, you should see the actual responses from the fans who actually filled the application out on the WNH website and their headshot to go with their application. Some are just plain stupid but others like Pizza Screamer is about how much she wants to have sex with him and how her favorite word is fuck (any variation of that word will also do.)

    The girlfriend applications are more than two years old but it still is enough to be cringe-worthy.

    • Ali Says:

      Lol, most of the women on that list should be ashamed to attach there mugshots…um headshots haha!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I put the first video up and within minutes it was ‘private’ and then the entire account removed. I guess FDC has a lot more readers than she might have assumed. I swear, it was removed within 15 minutes of me posting it.

      Hey tards, it sucks when others see your freaky behavior and perhaps in turn you see it yourself. I’ll give the person the benefit of the doubt and think that maybe her behavior in the two years since that was taped have changed. Maybe she’s seen what asses she and her 27 other friends looked like to the normal world, which included David.

  45. Rubber Ducky Says:

    There seems to be way too much hand wringing here over stuff you claim to not care about.

    And how many other readers eye glaze over when they see yet another novel from “Burt” the frau and scroll past it?

    • Jen Says:

      I like Burt. *shrug*

    • Thorazine Says:

      LOL Rubber Ducky… The Tard comes in all variations. The openly OTT mockable kind, such as gets mocked here, the downlow kind too ashamed or afraid (cowardly) to declare their love and support for their fave (can’t see why, since it’s only the MUSIC they love, right?) in front of family, spouse or friends for fear of being mocked, and the above it all, hypocritical tards who think they are better than or a step above ‘those’ tards, heh heh. Lack of insight, irony and excessive defensiveness and snark are the tells. IMO, a tard is a tard is a tard – betcha most of you who get your backs up your asses defending Cook against the likes of me post more about him at DCO, MJ’s and other places more than you let on.

      Gotta love coaxing and watching the closet tard come out in all its glory, after the right pokes have been administered. Off to find some new fish for a bit. Barrel fishin’ gets a bit boring after a while πŸ™‚

    • burt Says:

      Rubber Ducky – whatever. Is that short enough for you?

      Throazine – You forgot a tard variation… the one who is pissed at the object of their affection but can’t let go so instead, spends countless hours looking around the net for news, “bad” stats and then posts here (and who knows where else) hoping to find people to bitch along with you.

      Jen – thank you! People like you are the reason I still come here despite the comments that get thrown at me sometimes.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I like you too Burt. You are spot on about the type of tard that Thorazine forgot to add to her list.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Burt, I like you but I’m not a David Cook fan at all.

        Thorazine,,,, I like you too.. even like Rubber Ducky….

        Say, how about that crazy earring tard?

      • burt Says:

        Black Angel, Nonna – thank you! I like you too. I feel like I’m 5 years old saying this by the way, but whatever!

        FDC – I also like you even though you are not a fan. That doesn’t remotely matter to me, either here or in every day life. πŸ™‚

      • Fluffy Says:

        Burt, you are going to have to hand in your tard card if you can like people who aren’t fans. What’s WRONG with you? *Aghast*

      • burt Says:

        I know, right? Shocking. I’m trying to start a new tard-trend – tolerance. Oh no, I’ve admitted tolerance! Damn, how did I get the card to begin with? *confused*

    • Cooks_FUFL Says:

      Rubber Ducky…for what it’s worth, I agree with you. πŸ™‚

  46. Thorazine Says:

    There is an old saying, goes a little something like this…

    ”Throw a rock in a pack of wild dogs, (or tards for the purpose of this story)

    The one that’s hit… will holler.

    Burt…. Woof, Woof πŸ˜‰

    • burt Says:

      Well, it was a comment you made after someone mentioned me hence my response. But you should read it again and realize that I wasn’t actually commenting about myself (there’s no point, you never listen and believe what you want) I was simply saying that I think you’ve forgotten a tard definition. Maybe try to think about that a little.

    • Fluffy Says:

      I think you have way too much time on your hands.

  47. cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:

    To: Thorazine (and others). Okay. The very fact that I obviously read, lurk and sometimes post in this forum identifies me as a β€œtard” – that’s all it takes. Cuz, if all I did was buy his records and go to an occasional concert then yeah, I’d be a normal or β€œcasual fan.”

    But in my book, even bothering to read and comment on forums such as this is enough to earn me β€œtard” status. Sigh. (Why me?). But guess what peeps? – I am not alone – nope – cuz ALL of us who come here are tards – some of you (like Thorazine) are just in denial is all. I have no such delusions though.

    So, be my guest – deny it as much as you like, what do I care? But whether we are willing to admit it to ourselves or not, sorry gals, we are what we are. We are all like-minded, poking fun at other tards who we deem loopier than ourselves; (nothing wrong with that BTW)!

    For myself, all I know with certainty is that prior to AI and in particular this Season 7 dude coming along, these boards and fan sites did not exist for me. I had no clue anyone could or would devote hours and hours of their day inhabiting such places. Yeah, must have been living under a rock I guess.

    Fast forward 3+ years later and like it or not, here I am, a card carrying denizen of Cooktardlandia, helpless, like a fly on the proverbial flypaper, trapped, wanting to somehow break these sticky bonds and fly far, far away,– but, so far, I can’t. Not. Quite. Yet.

    But fellow-tards, this reality applies to all of us who still read, lurk and post here. Love him or hate him, he (and his way OTT fans) still fascinate us. Why else are all of us in here commenting on everyone ELSE’S bad behaviour? It’s a simple truth. Yeah, reality bites – but we just can’t seem to walk away can we? And yes, I am looking at you Thorazine – you don’t have to like him to be tarding for him you know! Newsflash: You are a tard so suck it up already…jeesh.

    Oh sure, many of us have moved on and more will follow sooner or later. But the fact that this site exists and even thrives tells me there is an interest in this particular artist yet, and it’s HIM and the lunatic fringe who stalk him that we seem to be the most fixated on – it’s not β€œKris” or β€œGlam” or (god forbid) β€œWheezy”– no, I would say that three-quarters of the posts on this forum are STILL devoted to David Cook and his tards. After 3 years. Any speculation as to why that might be?

    • just don't get it Says:

      because some of us (i am including myself in the
      cooktard fandom!) are completely INSANE????!!
      I will be the 1st to admit I am a tard, but just
      when I think i’ve done something OTT – someone
      comes along & does something I couldn’t even
      dream of!!!

    • Black Angel Says:

      There are varying levels of tardism. Just because you follow an artist, doesn’t make you a tard. It’s batshit crazy behavior that makes you a tard, in my honest opinion and I don’t consider myself a tard. Fan – yes, tard – NO!

      • just don't get it Says:

        is there something in between a fan & a tard??
        I’m definitely more than a fan, but might be less
        than a tard…..

      • Fluffy Says:

        The lunatic fringe is fascinating and frightening. For whatever reason, David Cook is still interesting to me. If that makes me a tard, so be it. I’m allergic to puffy paint, signs, hanging out on fan boards where it’s thought that he shits puppies and rainbows or where people sit around and talk about his body parts. I don’t camp out, I don’t fly to shows, I don’t friend his mom or Neal’s girlfriend or his dog. I work from home and am home with my kids so I get bored. I got tired of hanging out at MJs because I’m sick unto death of the Glamberts. Sometimes, when I’m sick of proofreading, I want to read (or chat) about things that interest me or amuse me. I started coming here because it amused me. If I do something mock-worthy then mock away, but I’m going to mock right back at things like the notion of posting because you’re the detective of super secret cells of self-loathing tards lurking on message boards trying to be cool πŸ™‚

      • burt Says:

        I see myself as between the two – there *is* something between it. Right? RIGHT? PLEASE SAY I’M NOT A TARD!!!!!111!!!!

        Seriously though I’m a fan of the guy – we all know this. I like his music, I like the man. I don’t however fixate on his looks. I’m realistic that he’s not living as a monk and that doesn’t bother me. I would go see him play if I had the chance but it’s unlikely I’d go out of my way to meet him. I don’t ever intend to follow him round on tour or otherwise. I don’t want 100,000 photos with him. I don’t talk about him all day on Twitter. I don’t invest any time in helping his career aside from buying the music and very occasionally recommending his music (I spend my time making my own living not lining the pockets of a millionaire). I don’t even post on other other boards about him. But I do laugh at the fans who make fools of themselves being OTT for all the world to see – it’s funny, wrong, worrying and all that stuff – it fascinates me. Had it not been for Twitter I wouldn’t have even known they existed.

        So yes, posting here does make me more of a fan than anyone who just buys the music I suppose, and yes, I sometimes talk about things other than the fans. Through this site I know more about him than I would otherwise but it’s kind of a by-product really and I certainly still don’t know everything about him – don’t want to. But really this is the same as other people I like – some artists I know very little about but like their music but for others I know a little more, for various reasons. I’m a hardcore fan of nobody and that’s how I intend it to stay. My point is, there is a difference in levels of fans for anyone and I don’t think you can say anyone that comes here is automatically a tard, not because I don’t want to admit it but just because we’re not all doing the same scary shit.

        I definitely think there’s a very clear difference between coming here and all stuff the hardcore pack do. For them it’s their life (or so it seems) and they see nothing wrong with it but for me, coming here, makes me laugh/worry about their sanity. I comment and move on. I listen to his music when it’s there, I move on. I’m just not fixated on him whereas they are.

        Oops… I did it again. πŸ˜‰

      • burt Says:

        (Sorry, sorry, don’t mean to spam but I missed a vital point.)

        I think it’s kinda natural to not want to be grouped with the hardcore tards. Not because there isn’t a bit of ” big fan” (as opposed to “casual fan”) in us, but because what they do is often just fucking crazy. I know I would never do that crazy shit and the very fact that we can see they’re acting crazy seems proof to me that we’re not one of them. Despite being a somewhere above casual fan (and not being in denial about that), I just don’t want to be grouped with people who do that shit, I guess.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I admitted to FDC years ago that I’m half tard on my mother’s side, so no secret there. πŸ˜€

      • Fluffy Says:

        Lol! Semi-tard πŸ™‚

      • Black Angel Says:

        HAHA! A half-breed tard.

  48. Thorazine Says:

    I’m neither a Cook fan nor hater – it’s great, cuz it gives me the freedom to say whatever I want about him, his tards w/o giving 2 shizznets. NO EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT. It’s fun just watching /observing over these months the reactions of the real cray crays that attempt to hide themselves on the internet, in forums such as this, behind a mask of ”but, but I’m a normal fan”, ‘I’m a fan of his music – I buy it, go to the concerts, blah blah”, while slinging all the arrows they can muster at those ‘other’ cray crays who are much worse than we! LOLOL… It’s hard to keep the real tard at bay – scratch, poke or prod long and deep enough, and it will reveal itself…

    What’s that sound I hear? *cups ear* Could it be the sound of some hit dogs still hollerin’? πŸ™‚ LOLOL

    • Fluffy Says:

      No, it’s the sound of your voice echoing in your padded room πŸ™‚

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      Someone doth protests too much. Must be interesting to live in a house without mirrors. Takes a lot of emotional investment to spew the hate in post after post….but if denial gets you through the day, so be it, lol.

      Hey Burt, I like you too πŸ™‚

    • Sosueme Says:

      Dude? DUDE? Who do you think you’re kidding? Seriously? You spew copious amounts of detailed stats about a guy you claim to not give a shit about. When called on it, you give a perfunctory, “oh yeah, Lambert and other Random Idol suck too”. LOL.

      If I was a betting woman I’d say you have a dartboard with Cook’s face on it in your little “Anti-Shrine” in your mother’s basement. Seriously dude, some of the stats you share on here would require the use of CHARTS, and I find that adorable. πŸ™‚

      Both Cook and his music are pretty inoffensive (might be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on you point of view). It takes a serious amount if obsessive time and energy to hate someone so much and to try to keep up this charade of feigned disinterest. I think that we need to coin a new term for this particular breed of tard. Anti-tard seems too easy. Anyone?

    • burt Says:

      Ha! Thorazine you are hilarious (but I’m still genuinely worried about you). Keep going though, you are fooling precisely nobody, but it’s kinda fun to watch this whole new tard breed emerge. Like discovering a new species.

      P.S. Thanks Amused – you too! πŸ™‚

  49. Thorazine Says:

    LOLOL – You all are funny πŸ™‚ And predictable – Of course it is ME that has the problem, but I can take it, if it means watching the hypocrites and the delusional come out and play. You all have been thoroughly conditioned by the poking to respond true to form. The laughs you elicit from myself and others across the net have been many, I have passed the link here on to many friends for a good laugh. As Cook’s CD continues to fail, and this era goes belly up, and the tards become more desperate and delusional in their defense of the indefensible… cool πŸ™‚ Good, cheap entertainment is hard to come by, and you all are most excellent in providing it… Please continue – like a box o’chocolates, you never know what you gonna get!

    *munches popcorn, waits for next act*

    • freedavidcook Says:

      I tarded mightily once for some stupid actor. Fortunately I realized one day he couldn’t act his way out of a paper bag and that my infatuation was hormonal mostly. I snapped out of tarddom and have never tarded again even if I would never toss Roger Daltrey out of my bed if he had the misfortune to land there. It means I can spot tard at a ten mile distance now. None of us tarding over this actor ever did anything remotely close to what the Idol tards have done….

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I bow to you Thorazine. Clearly you are so very different and much better than us. Here are examples of things WE do that you would never, ever stoop so low as to do:

      *We follow Cook’s career and know about his chart positions….oh, wait…you do that too.

      *We point and laugh at his fans….oh, wait….you do that too.

      *We respond to comments from people who ‘poke’ us….oh, wait….you do that too.

      *We continue to post on a blog that has a heavy Cook influence….oh, wait…you do that too.

      *We say we are not tards….oh, wait….you do that too.

      *You say we are predictable in our comments….guess what, we think you are too.

      Have fun and tell your friends we said hi. The more the merrier as they say.

    • burt Says:

      The tard thing is still being debated Thorazine but the more you post, the more you out yourself as a troll. What a thing to be – a troll on a blog that laughs at OTT Idol fans and tries to stir them up by posting detailed facts that you spend hours of your time finding about someone you now claim to be indifferent about (but only the one guy I notice – funny that you claim to be indifferent when he’s your subject every time). Yet your friends and others on the net laugh at us? Yep, OK, keep telling yourself that. One day the covers will fall from the mirrors and then you’ll see. Until then, carry on. We’re laughing at you as much as you’re laughing at us.

      • Thorazine Says:

        We have a mutually symbiotic and satisfying relationship – one I look forward to continuing until it no longer amuses me. You all keep tarding, keep up the delusions, the hypocrisy’s…

        I will uphold my end of the bargain by keeping you all abreast of the doings and goings on, fact and data based of course, I feel like sharing relative to Cook – agreed? πŸ™‚ Whew, that was easier than I thought – Don’t you just love win-wins? OK, time for you to amuse me, then afterwards, I will share the lastest progress report – do you want graphs and powerpoint presentations this go round? Or should I just keep it simple? πŸ™‚

        *munches more popcorn*

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Oh I see Thorazine, you tard for us!! Yes, I’d like excel spreadsheets graphing his progress along with others that recently release records so I can compare them. A pie chart would be cool too if you use pretty colors. Thanks for spending all that time for us, you must really have a thing for us. Please don’t let it get creepy or we’ll have to add you to our ‘list’.

      • burt Says:

        Earlier I nearly wrote that maybe some of us aren’t tards for Cook but for his OTT fans – tards for the cooktards. But look! Now we have a tard for the tards for the cooktards. How fun!

        Before you do your next update Thorazine, could you look up the words “fact”, “comparison” and “current market”. Could I also have figures for other people who released records in the same period? Could also compare it to the amount of promotion those people are doing? I know that will make one complicated graph but it’s just so I can have a clear picture of everything.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I don’t want charts and bullshit like that, I want TARD ART. Where is the tard art?!

    • Sosueme Says:

      Hahaha. I don’t necessarily dispute your analysis of Cook or his “talents”, and this album era has definitely not been successful, anyway you slice it. Of course it has not been the unmitigated disaster that you so vociferously claim either, and it is that over-the-top hyperbole that gives you away.

      You can claim to be a just a too cool for school tard basher all you want, but as long as you continue to devote so much time and energy to bashing such a seemingly innocuous, but not untalented guy as David Cook, your true motivations are pretty obvious. I mean seriously, he’s no John Lennon, for sure, but neither is is he Mike Posner or that loser from
      Limp Bizkit.

      • burt Says:

        This! It’s David fucking Cook. No offense to the guy but come on! A lot of fans – no matter the level – don’t put this effort into analyzing his career. You claim to be neutral to him so why do you need to know so much about how he’s doing? If it’s for our benefit, well I think we’ve shown we don’t buy your stats so it’s just a waste of time – why are you wasting your life like that? He’s not doing great, we know that, but he’s selling albums while doing little promotion. How many other people can claim that?

        Now if you wanted to do this on The Beatles or someone at that level – with universal appeal and more data available then OK but it’s David Cook. I mean really. Does this not seem absurd to you Thorazine?

        I would have so much more respect if you at least did this for the other Idol contestants. Or just came out and told us what it was David Cook did to you.

  50. Thorazine Says:

    Roger Daltrey? Definitely “not toss outta bed under any circumstances” material, lololol… Totally tard worthy at any age, so I’d be OK w/anyone with a thang for him πŸ˜‰

  51. Thorazine Says:

    You got it Nonna-muss! I’ll get my crack team working on it right now… in lieu of the powerpoint preso, more research is needed, so it’s off to scan the add board, and the Soundscan sales charts to see how well we’re doing today… I’m excited, are you? This CD I’m told is a veritable masterwork, and I bet they couldn’t keep it stocked at Walmart this week… I bet folks all over were just clamoring to buy and download it. I kept turning on my TV to catch Cook on a talk show or on one of those dancing shows even 9th place Idol finishers get on – I must have tuned in the wrong night I guess – rats!! Why, I even requested it on my local AC station, and they played Time of My Life instead, go figure… Anyhoo, I will have what you request ready as soon as I compile all the data… Word is bond.

    • Fluffy Says:

      You know, if you were *funny* I’d probably enjoy you. But it’s more… creepy?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        OK, there’s the magic word. Thorazine, you’ve made one of the people you tard so strongly feel ‘creepy’. I’m afraid you will be going on the list.

        Hmmmm, I wonder if Thorazine has tattoos of us and sits up late at night making signs using puffy paint and glitter.

  52. Black Angel Says:

    Thorazine, why so much anger directed at David Cook? Did something happen to you personally?

  53. Thorazine Says:

    Sure Burt – if you can look up ‘delusion’, ‘hypocrisy’ and ‘frauen’ and relate them all back to your behavior as a Cooktard the past few years, LOL… Everything you try to throw off on me just lands right back in your laps. Is this a fansite? I think not. It is a site dedicated to mocking tards and their behavior. Well, try turning the mirror back in on yourselves, instead of at the most obvious candidates – cause you are no better than those you try to mock. It is hilarious to many of us how easily this is missed here. I and many like me mock YOU, and YOURS, like you mock ‘those’ fans, LOLOL… you have just been too lost in your Cooktardery and defensiveness to get it. I make no distinction between ‘them’ and ‘you’… It’s all the same – a tard is a tard is a tard – all mockable πŸ™‚

    • just don't get it Says:

      then you must be havin a BLAST today Thorazine!
      i take it all with a grain of salt – mock away
      at me!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Burt, what Thorazine is trying to say is “she’s rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off her and sticks on you.”

      And you tard us, so what’s your point Thorazine? How does that make you any different from us or the tards we mock?? It’s one giant circle of tardism isn’t it. Now, let’s say we all hold hands and sing Kumbaya, shall we?

      My, my….just like a typical tard, so easy to poke. πŸ˜€

      • Thorazine Says:

        LOLOL – Naw, that would be you, and your fellow Cook Tards… I been poking you all for months, and like true Pavlovian dogs, you performed, and still perform on cue beautifully. Take a bow, gather your roses, great performance! *applause*

        Try something a little more original next time, mmkay? I’m sure as the fanbase continues imploding, and the reality of this fail really sinks in, the entertainment level is going to ratchet up several notches. Like the good tards you are, you will provide us endless days of laughs. Can’t wait for the tour cray cray – that is going to be a hoot, I tell ya πŸ™‚

      • Fluffy Says:

        I thought you were leaving? Didn’t you ciao us and poof off in a big cloud of smoke?

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Again with the “I’m rubber you’re glue….”

        Thorazine will never leave. She’s a tard. No better than anyone. She can’t stop commenting, the first sign. Oh! and the great comebacks. Hahahaha. This HAS been fun Thorazine, please keep leaving, because the more you leave the more you post and it’s been quite fun.

    • Ali Says:

      Aww did someone forget to take there meds today lmao?! So can we all just ignore the troll and get back to the tard reaction to what may or maybe not a new relationship for Dave? I’m sure wehoscott would know the deets, being such an insider and all lol! And krunkjess and company have been quite lately, or I may just not being looking anymore lol. I’m thinking when we get tour dates there will be a mass tard caravan following the buses, or RV or whatever.

  54. Thorazine Says:

    Thank you just don’t get it – you have come the closest to getting it! πŸ™‚


  55. just don't get it Says:

    don’t get me wrong, I am a ridiculous David Cook fan –
    but i just don’t get all the drama & seriousness!!!
    Hence my screen name.

  56. Jen Says:


    Don’t poke the troll, kids.

    • Fluffy Says:

      That was probably the most sensible posting all day πŸ™‚

      • Black Angel Says:

        I just don’t get it. Is Thorazine a rejected groupie? Why all this anger? It’s very creepy.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        The funniest part is she really believes she’s making us angry. I haven’t had so much fun on here in a long time. You know, I was just thinking the other day that it’s been so boring. We haven’t been threatened with law soots by big time lawlers in ages. We haven’t been called jellious haterz in eons. We haven’t had another tard come here to stick up for another tard’s sanity since I can’t remember when. Thorazine was just what we needed. For that, Thorazine, I thank you.

        Today has brought back so many fond memories.

        Oh, and somewhere here someone brought up tard art. That would be a great blog FDC. It’s been awhile since we’ve gazed upon the beauty that these arteests put on the interwebz for the world to admire.

      • just don't get it Says:

        apparently i am the closest one to “getting it” –
        should i be scared??

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Now I’m confused. Just don’t get it gets it?? It must be some kind of cryptic message, like the Cooktards and their DC=42 bullshit.

      • just don't get it Says:

        trust me “just don’t get it” DOESN’T GET IT!!

      • Jen Says:

        Lol Fluffy πŸ˜›

  57. Thorazine Says:

    lolol… no harm, no foul just don’t get it! I find it humorous all the vitriol and namecalling and shade tree psychoanalysis directed at me – I have about peed my pants today with the tard responses… Oh well, enough fun for one Monday… I’ll leave you all to keep creating more fodder and material in peace – Ciao Peeps!

  58. burt Says:

    Ah this place is hilarious! So many laughs, thanks guys. πŸ˜€

    Oh and “tard art”? I don’t know what it is but it sounds like something I need to see. Might bring some tard culture into my life.

  59. I prefer to think of myself as Tard-Lite. actually.

  60. Jen Says:

    I’m not really sure where to put this but um. I guess RCAed linked to here on his questions thread at DCO. Oh God. Lol

    • Fluffy Says:

      So I’ve heard. What did he link exactly? The whole site? Too funny. Ed, Ed. You’re supposed to be the dude who interacts with the fans. You sometimes have to breathe and wait to push that send button, man πŸ™‚

      I mean, I don’t envy him dealing with some of the poo flung at him by some of the people on there but…

    • Fluffy Says:

      Oh, I went back and read, haha. Well, the stuff showcased here… it’s probably a good exhibit A when you’re telling people that maybe they need to back down a bit from fanland and spend more time in real life?

      • Fluffy Says:

        Though I don’t know that slapping down the fans has any real effect – the ones that need it won’t listen, and then you just piss off the people who actually care…

        Not like I know what the frack I’m talking about. I’m no music business person πŸ™‚

    • burt Says:

      He’s removed the link – what did he link to? Was it in a negative way?

      Makes me smile that anyone at RCA would point fans here for any reason. I do hope they appreciate that some of us are actually fans though – ones that chose to post here rather than get caught up with the drama of the other fans. Problem is, the fans we talk about think we are just bitter, spiteful and bitchy so they won’t see that they need to calm down to prevent all the talk.

      Is anyone else wondering if Ed is actually a very hormonal woman? From what I know, I like him and I love when he lets rip at the fans, poor guy must have a hell of a job on his hands. I wonder how David feels about someone posting stuff like that? It’s not professional at all but still makes me snigger. What has actually happened to make him react like that anyway? Something to do with voting I guess? Guess it doesn’t pay to spend all your waking hours voting for someone after all. Good to know I had that right.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        I believe I saw Ed once. He’s a man.

        Burt, you forgot to say that we are also all jelly haterzzzzz.

    • Rubber Ducky Says:


      Poor Ed, he must crack a bottle of wine at 9am and continue all day long in order to numb the pain of dealing with those screaming harpies.

  61. Thorazine Says:

    HAHAHAHA – Was wondering when RCA and Ed was gonna get around to issuing a smackdown to Cook fans… I think he is trying to piss them all off… because maybe they and RCA are looking to start over from scratch, seeing as how the CD and the era has officially bombed w/the album falling out of the Billboard chart officially yesterday, sales of it are in the shitter, no real buzz or interest in Cook anywhere where it counts, the single dead on HAC, AC spinning it but not enough – WHAT DO THEY HAVE TO LOSE NOW? Cook’s fans are an embarrassment to him, and if they are trying to rejigger some things w/his career, he’d be SMART to piss of the Idol contingent and go all out for a new set of younger less wacko fans. wooowee, I couldn’t have scripted this any better, lololl… Thank you, Cooktardlandia, for doing what you do, and doing it so well that you piss off the PTB and provide us all with more laughs than we can stand πŸ™‚

    • nonna-muss Says:

      How’s the excel spread sheet and power point presentation coming along.

      Thorazine, for once I will agree with you. Ed’s postings today brought tears of joy to my eyes.

      Now if we can just get him to issue behavior suggestions for the upcoming tour. I’ll start with some ideas:

      *No need to line up 12 hours before doors open (this includes sleeping on the frikkin’ sidewalk for Jestro’s sake).
      *Do not leave all your empty drink containers and fast food wrappers on the sidewalk outside the venue.
      *It’s a concert, you are not trying to outrun the bulls in Pamplona to get up front. Walk like normal people do at shows.
      *David is fully capable of carrying the show on his own and does not need the peanut gallery up front interrupting him at every chance
      *David knows you love him, otherwise you wouldn’t be there, no need to scream it at him the entire show.

      I’m sure I’ve forgotten many other useful hints. Sadly I think my post will not hit the ears and eyes it needs to hit. The tards won’t be happy until they make it so no venue will have him.

      • Fluffy Says:

        *Please be sure to wear your David Cook earrings – you know, the ones with his face on them. That will make him love you.
        *Your signs should be *poster board*, not some wimpy scrap of paper. Flourescent is best, but only if it has glitter letters.
        *If someone tries to beat you to the front row, elbow them. Elbow them hard!

        Did I cover it? πŸ™‚

  62. nonna-muss Says:

    And to calm the restless natives, David just tweeted. Now they’ll forget all about Ed and be spam tweeting Cook. So fun!

  63. Jen Says:

    They’re going on and on on twitter about how terrible it was that Ed linked to here.


    • burt Says:

      Yeah that is annoying me too, Jen! I’ve seen us descried as:

      “the craziest of the crazy and just plain mean”
      “not kind to Cook fans”
      “not fans. They’re haters of fans.”

      Oh and the site is “wicked”.

      Xavier agrees with Ed – guess he didn’t click the link and read the stuff about himself. I noticed someone seemed surprised he and Scott were OK with it. Love that X can not see his behavior over “We Believe” is the kind that Ed means! Even saw him say OTT fans are why he doesn’t post on DCO now! So he’s not shared with his friends that he was banned then?

      A couple of people understand that if you don’t act like a crazy fool then nobody would be talking about them. Wish everyone got that but anyone that acts that way sees us as crazy and giving David a bad reputation. I actually think that a group of fans publicly condemning their kind of behavior shows there is a group of sensible fans out there, that’s not a bad thing.

      To repeat Jen: SOME OF US ARE ACTUALLY FANS TOO. Some of us care (just not as much as the hardcore fans). Some people here actually tried to prevent actual harm to David’s career recently (not me but it happened). Just because we know our boundaries and can recognize the crazy does NOT make us evil. We also don’t hate other fans, we actually all like each – fans liking each other, what a fucking novelty. Some of us have even defended the precious hair. See, we are all fans. πŸ˜‰

      • Jen Says:

        Lol thank you Burt, exactly. I can only speak for myself but I came here not to be a “hater” or make fun of people but because these Superfans had finally pissed me off enough to need an outlet.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Jelly Haterz united! We just want to see the cray-crays act like human beings with some dignity, humanity and real regard for others.

        RCA Ed if you’re reading. Please get UnBaldy his own version of Bret Michael’s Big John for this tour. Someone badass that will not allow the stupid to happen around Cook.

      • cooktardx10sansdelusions Says:


        WORD to yr post!! If I wasn’t so incoherent 90% of the time – that is exactly what I would say!!! Luv yu πŸ™‚

    • sodagrape Says:

      I would just like to co-sign Jen’s post. I am a fan. I just grew tired of being made to feel like I was a some sort of bad or inferior fan because I: only bought one copy of his cd, only go to shows in my area, don’t camp out in line, don’t have 50 pictures with him, don’t vote in polls, don’t tweet about Cook and his band 24/7, listen to music that isn’t by Cook and his friends, and actually have other hobbies and interests besides David Cook.

      • Fluffy Says:

        I bet you don’t have a pillowcase with his face on it either, do you? Ugh. Bad, bad fan.

  64. Sosueme Says:

    Oh for fucks sake Ed, why would you feel the need to fan the flames? There are like what, 20 or 30 Megatards, weeds and roses combined? And there are perhaps 10 regular posters on here. Most of us are Cook fans and tard-tards – I would classify myself as a semi-tard or tard-lite. There are a couple of AI-tard-tards who don’t give a shit about David Cook one way or another, and of course their is one adorable Anti-tard who spends her days throwing darts at pictures of Cook, and whom I am pretty sure he either refused to have sex with, or had sex with and didn’t call back (Hi Thorazine/Aifan33!). In any event, we are all a bunch of weirdos with too much time on our hands, obvously. I really don’t see how the relatively fringe-dwelling mega-tards, tard-trades, and anti-tards relate to or significantly impact David Cook’s mainstream career. Unless of course people in authority like RCAed bring attention to it. I get his point, and don’t disagree with what he is saying, but what an unprofessional Dumbass!

    • burt Says:

      It’s interesting isn’t it? I have to wonder what led to him losing it – something had to have happened. Maybe the OTT voting has caused problems with something and it was noticed by a third party? In that situation then those few “megatards” (ha!) do have an impact on how he’s perceived. BUT, he’s not the only one with fans like, this sort of thing must happen all the time?

      Are you saying Thorazine is Aifan33? I remember those venomous tweets. Stuff about Cook being a bad, egotistical person and everyone would find out soon enough. Also stuff about him doing something to hurt a family member if I remember correctly.

      • Sosueme Says:

        Who knows, but she isn’t allowed on twitter anymore, and hatred and venom that powerful needs to vented, in my experience.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Isn’t Aifan33 the one who snuck on his bus? Or am I thinking of someone else?

      • sogosueme Says:

        It is an unsubstantiated rumor that Aifan33 is Bus-Raper, but since we are talking about faceless, nameless internet ghosts here, it amuses me to imagine that they are one and the same. Someone did determine that Aifan33’s twitter account and subsequent reign of terror was started the day after the bus incident, so it is a bit of a smoking gun, but certainly not definitive.

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      Ever occurred to you that there’s a million more reasons to watch you tards froth at the mouth? Just because you want to fuck the rug wearer doesn’t mean everyone wants to.

  65. WilcoisAwesome Says:

    I’m glad he said what he said. Some people need a reality check. I’m not saying he should be the one to give it to them, or that what he said wouldn’t offend, but they have also said worse to him as well, some without apology or regard.They keep asking questions about what they can do, when David is going to tour, and Ed gives them what information he can (really, his hands are tied in some respects to some information and when it can actually be released), but they still manage to bite his head off and complain about something else anyway.
    Oh Great! Tour news soon?!?! AWESOME. Except, we don’t like that he’s touring with Gavin DeGraw! You should get him on tour with the Script! Make sure he headlines and has the same set length as the headliner! Make sure he comes to my major city! Can we get backstage access? Make sure CDs are sold at the merch table!
    I hate when people tell me how to do my job when I get up and sing. I hate when people tell me how to do my job when I work with bands (though, like Ed, I’m sure, always open to respectful opinions and suggestions). Why can’t people just enjoy the music?!

  66. karma police Says:

    hey all, havent been here in a while but checked in now and went to this post to see what all the 300 n something comments were about, i figured something is going on lol and WOW the dumbass so called fans are still at it, they still dont get it, u know back in the day like ( bob segar and j giels, arrowsmith etc.) u liked the band bought a ticket went to the concert rocked out and went out. not stand by buses and wait to talk to them and get mad if they didnt talk to you. I dont blame David for having (if he did) an attitude sometimes, cuz if he did stop and talk to every single person that wants to talk while on tour he would never make it to show #2. and Nonna-muss I agree with you that DCO should post a behavior suggestions for these idiots, cuz we would all know its not for us, and as far as a gf, I dont know but he could have girls all over the globe for all we know lol and that weho whatever probally needs to have a restraining order on him sounds like him n his friends follow David n friends every where how sad, well done for now i have alot of reading to catch up on lol

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      arrowsmith? πŸ˜†

      • sogosueme Says:

        Holly? LOL. This sounds exactly like one of her many sockpuppet personas. The “cool”, “with-it” one. LOL. Also, that typo, and the obsession with Steven Tyler and other dried-up old “rockers”. “Rock-on” Holly, “rock-on”. Sincere apologies Karma if I’m offbase.

  67. SmelledTheCoffee Says:

    Sorry I missed this. I’m assuming whatever was on DCO is now gone? What was being said about us?

  68. MK Says:

    No, it’s still there, and it’s gotten better. His latest post says “In any event, yes, I was referring to that tiny minority of fans that willfully engages in such behavior (and will gleefully stalk Dave across America this summer without finding it the least bit creepy), not the average DC fan.” The psychos are having a meltdown. I’ve seen comments like “I’m already losing love for Dave, Ed isn’t helping.”

    It’s so fucking ridiculous! Who needs Jersey Shore when you have The Land of Cooktardia. Jesus.

    Links, if you want them:
    http://www.davidcookofficial.com/us/content/rca-eds-corner-send-your-suggestions-feedback-ideas-and-yes-well-try-answer-odd-question-too?page=1 (scroll down for this one, there’s no direct link).

    I love how they’re getting called out on their shit. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out. Now maybe “Dave” can get some normal fans.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      Poor Ed. I’ve never made fun of him, just the tards. I think he has the most thankless task of all time and am not sure how he does it without drugs and alcohol.

    • nonna-muss Says:

      You know what’s so obvious? The ones that are the most upset are the ones he’s talking about. Everyone else thinks Ed is right (and Ed, if you see this…I don’t mean just here….PM’s and DM’s are flying across the fandom!). People want to kiss Ed, marry Ed and have little Ed babies! 90% of the Cook Fandom are delirious with joy over this.

      If this was a plan of some kind it’s working beautifully. The easiest way to spot an uber tard now is that they are outraged by Ed’s behavior.

  69. karma police Says:

    LOL apologies accepted sogosueme, ha i just noticed that i spelled that wrong i was just so excited after trying to catch up with all this reading i came into today, no worries here

  70. Jen Says:

    There’s a tweet to AJ saying they’re the “front 40.” I can only speculate what that’s about…

    • Karen D Says:

      That had nothing to do with David, concerts, or music.

      • Jen Says:

        Ah okay. Thought I had seen Ed mention 30-40 invested fans or something along those lines and thought it might’ve been a reference to that but obviously couldn’t tell with only half the conversation.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      Front 40 acres that Cook sees when he looks out over his audience. Or perhaps they only each have 40 active brain cells in their frontal lobes? Front 40 bucks a pop to the security guards just to be allowed into the building to see Cook’s show.. it could mean anything.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        FDC, I just saw your post to Ed at DCO. Bravo! I think we appreciate Ed over here more than some do over there.

      • Jen Says:

        Lol, that was a good one FDC. Also, I particularly like the way Ed seems to know the distinction between someone meeting David a couple times and meeting him a whole bunch. Yes Ed, other fans ARE being left out. Just ask David how many he recognized over the radio promo tour. And that wasn’t because no one else wanted to go.

      • MK Says:

        Jen, don’t you know that the ones who have been to 60 shows are better than the casual fans who have only been to 1 or 2. The casual fans don’t deserve to meet him or talk to him because they aren’t real fans. Of course, “Dave” doesn’t want to meet them anyway because they don’t count.

      • on the edge Says:

        There’s a FDC post to RCAEd at DCO? (heh) Link please, I erased the crazy from my bookmarks…

      • burt Says:

        Would someone mind posting a link to FDC’s post on DCO? So much to wade through there, so little time!

      • freedavidcook Says:

        It’s been removed.

        I don’t think RCA is likely to try and shut me down. I’ve not criticized them or stolen copyrighted materials so it’s all good.

      • burt Says:

        What did you to say to make them feel like they had to remove it? Interesting!

        I’d like to know how RCA (and David himself I guess) feels about this blog.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Just told RCA Ed I’d never make fun of him because his is a hard job. I only poke the tards. If I had to do that job there would have to be hard drugs involved.

      • burt Says:

        Ha! Hope he saw it before it was removed. The fan communication part of that job must be a real nightmare – I don’t know how he keeps his cool. Doesn’t he do it for other artists too? If so, I wonder if he had similar issues?

      • freedavidcook Says:

        I believe RCA Ed has had his hands full with the Lambert Tards more than once too. I used to think they were more OTT than the Cook ones but right now I think Cook tards are possibly the worst ones. At least none of them stuck a tracker under the buses for the Glamnation Tour.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Burt, he does the same for Madam!!! I can’t even imagine.

        I’m reading some of the comments directed at him (Ed). I can’t believe people have the fucking nerve to call themselves fans when they would speak directly to one of David’s colleagues that way. But like I said, only the ultra invested are offended by all of this. I hope Cook & Co. are taking this opportunity to update the Looney List.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        I love when they try to tell RCA Ed and others connected to Cook how to do their jobs. It’s a freaking hoot that the tards think they know better than the professionals.

      • Burt Says:

        I’ve seen Ed mention the Daughtry fans/site too so that’s 3 groups of Idol fans we know of. He must really love that side of his job! I do feel for him because he seems to be OK just communicating in general and giving what news he can, he just struggles to deal with them when they go mad.

  71. Jen Says:

    Question: could RCA shut this site down? I saw it suggested on twitter as a better reaction than linking to it but that just seems laughable. (I know they throw that out a lot but I’m just wondering.)

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      πŸ˜† awwww poor babies don’t like people voicing an opinion huh! Just wait; they’ll start a pattishun next,

      • Fluffy Says:

        If MJ could be the subject of a petition to make her stop being mean to Pia (I think that was what the gist was), surely there can be a petition against this place. Meanie pants.

  72. MK Says:

    Dammit, I missed FDC’s post on DCO.

    I posted over there yesterday, praising Ed, and my post was edited so much that it doesn’t even say what I originally posted. Pisses me off. That’s why I don’t go to that site. It’s such bullshit.

    I’d bet everything I own that everything Ed has said is what David wants to say, but can’t because RCA has his balls in a sling.

    Now the crazies are tweeting to RCAPromo to fire Ed and replace him with FoolsApril. She is nothing but a fan who has been given power at DCO to do as she wants. Official websites like DCO should not allow fans to be moderators.

    • burt Says:

      I don’t understand why they are editing people’s posts there, especially if they are praising Ed. Isn’t that what they want?

      Question – when they edit them do they show them as edited? Just wondering if they make it clear. I’d never heard about them editing a lot there – something new they are doing maybe?

      Some of it has to be what David thinks – has to be, who wouldn’t find it weird that people want to meet you 1000 times or travel the country to see 100s of shows – but whether it’s all from him, I’m not sure. I’m certain he wouldn’t have delivered the message in the same way but no matter how it gets said, the people Ed is aiming at wont see it’s meant for them. This tour is going to be so interesting but I still can’t imagine the hardcore fans giving in.

      • MK Says:

        It does not show as edited, I don’t think. So it makes what I said be taken out of context.

        Lisa (FoolsApril) edited it because she said I was “attacking” other fans. Unlike Ed, I was pointing out actual instances instead of being broad. I guess since Lisa can’t edit Ed, since he’s paid and she’s just a fan volunteer, she has to assert her authority over the fans.

        The ones who are taking this whole thing entirely too seriously and calling for Ed to be fired are exactly the ones he’s talking about. David is just a singer. Just be a fan. Stop telling David what to do, stop telling RCA what to do, stop acting like you deserve something just because you’ve been to 50 concerts. For the love of everything holy, stop saying “David made me do it!”. David doesn’t MAKE any of us do anything. We all have free will.

      • nonna-muss Says:

        It doesn’t show as edited. Someone just posted a long winded diatribe aimed at Ed. My eyes glossed over by the second paragraph. I wish it wasn’t Friday so we could have more Ed tomorrow.

        One of the ubererst of uber creepy fans big, wide granny panties are in a giant wad over this. She’s one that goes to ALL the shows and always just ‘happens’ to run into David. It seems like a lot of them have taken to bitching and moaning on twitter now instead of DCO.

      • WilcoisAwesome Says:

        It doesn’t show that the post has been edited, at least for mine it didn’t notify me. I just happened to go and see responses after my post and noticed it was edited.

      • Burt Says:

        Hmmm editing posts and not making it clear they were isn’t good – can’t believe they’re doing that. Things like that will only make fan paranoia worse – no matter what camp they are in. Things are messy enough over there, why make it worse?

        Oh and FDC – according to a tweet I saw, Ed is “officially in cahoots” with you. You kept that quiet! And apparently it’s “difficult to see who is the most pathetic one here.” πŸ˜€

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Officially in cahoots?? Huh, well I wish someone had told me because I don’t know what the fuck they are talking about. I’ve been spending most of my walking moments dealing with earthquake aftermath and hurricane preparations, not worrying about DCO or Ed or anyone else but those under my own roof. Fucking paranoid psycho bitches

      • Fluffy Says:

        Well, hell, you’d think if they thought you were in cahoots with Ed that they’d be kissing your ass so you could help them get some access to the man! (Master?)

        FDC, isn’t this a fun weather week? I don’t live in this shithole I call Northern VA expecting to also deal with earthquakes and hurricanes lol.

  73. SmelledTheCoffee Says:

    Any chance RCA Ed could be Mr. Cook himself, and the latest comments were spurred on by the “fans” getting on his last nerve? Wouldn’t that be the shit. Perfect opportunity to get his frustrations out disguised as a poor label flunkie?

  74. nonna-muss Says:

    So now the tards are figuring out the best way to do Meet & Greets. Of course their ideas still put the fate of who gets to partake in their hands. Suggestions? Pay extra for passes. Yeah, that’ll work. He’ll still get all the ones who fly all over the country to see him, after all, what’s another 50 bucks or so.

    Another fantabulous idea is that the first 20 or so people who buy the CD at the merch table get meet & greet. That means the 20 people who have no problem sleeping on the sidewalk over night will buy his CD at every show. Again, he’ll be forced to see the same fug every night.

    Lottery type drawings at DCO. Guess who will be entering? The ones who post in threads about his neck, his lips, his skin, his ‘right’ leg. Just the people he wants to talk to I’m sure! I’m sure he’s beside himself with anticipation about meeting those ladies. This would also leave out the casual fan, who hasn’t joined DCO. It would also leave out the fans who fled from there because of the threads about his neck, his lips, his skin and his ‘right’ leg.

    One lovely fan came up with the idea to let other fans pick who gets passes based on fan awesomeness. Of course she says she’s kidding, but we already know that she and her weed friends think they are the awesome ones.

    This is going to be interesting to say the least. I hope RCA comes up with a way that is totally random. I can’t think how though.

  75. itsaname Says:

    Nonna, Unless David’s management comes up with a smart plan, the meet and greets are going to be a nightmare for him. It will be Scott, AnodyneJunkie and all their loyal followers at every one. I’d like to see them put a limit on this. Maybe each fan is allowed to attend two meet and greets per tour.

    I can understand wanting to meet a favorite singer or band. I can even understand wanting to get an autograph or photo with them. Once you’ve done that and had a chance to tell them thanks for the music, I can’t see why you would need to do it over and over again.

    Can you imagine what goes through his mind when someone approaches him for their 30th photo with him?

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I can kinda guess what goes through his mind, although I don’t know exactly which curse words he’s peppering his thoughts with. πŸ˜€

      Even if RCA came up with a plan, I’m sure the diehards would still find a way to get themselves in. After all, we are talking about ladies who have offered handies to venue security to gain access, bullied casino high rollers into switching seats with them and who knows what else.

      • freedavidcook Says:

        Did I read that right? Offered handjobs for access to security? Scraping jaw off floor now..

      • nonna-muss Says:

        Yes FDC, ask Top Idol. She spoke to venue security in her hometown and that’s what they told her.

      • Burt Says:

        Ew. I hope nobody took them up on the offer! If that’s true, just how desperate must those fans be? And for what? Why so desperate? It’s so weird to me that women their age are acting like that. I get that they’re deluded and think he likes seeing them but it’s not as if they’re getting anything else out of it (I hope).

        I understand wanting to meet people even though I rarely do it. With some people, I understand how you can have met a few times BUT that’s normally when you’ve genuinely bumped into them or when both fans and artists are into it and do stuff like arranging special events so they offer tickets to fans and choose to hang out. Anything like that is based on a healthy relationship between the two parties though and involves treating the person like the normal person they are, having normal conversations and not flailing and fawning.

        A while ago I saw a tweet with a link to his old MySpace blogs and It struck me how keen he was for people to say hello at shows. How times change. Other artists on Twitter often invite people to say hello after shows too, sometimes they mention it on stage. As far as I can tell, David never does that and I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t want contact with ANY fans or that he’s not a sociable person. I just wish the OTT fans had a way to see that and realize if they backed off they and other fans would have a better relationship with him which in turn would help his career. It makes me sad for him that it’s not the case and he misses out on meeting “normal” people.

        I can’t see how they can make the M&G issue fairer. Even if they say there’s a limit like two a year/tour they’ll still get round it and then cause problems when they get turned away because they’re on the looney list. And that’s the big thing, he’s in a position where he probably can’t stand to lose those biggest supporters yet and he really shouldn’t need to anyway. I wonder whether they’ll even bother with meet and greets, maybe doing something more casual after the shows with good security would serve him better. I don’t think he or RCA will win this either way.

      • Jen Says:

        There was actually an instance on the last tour where Krunk Jess and her crew snuck in to a M&G and when they were being kicked out they made such a scene that David let them take their picture just to shut them up. So yeah, they definitely would need a list or something.

    • Fluffy Says:

      How many times do you need to meet him? Once is fine – but after that… I don’t get it. And clearly he’s not your BFF if you’re still standing in line to meet him??

      • songkat7 Says:

        I met him once after the first show I attended; it was nice. I went to the buses after the last show I went to, but he didn’t stop except for a few fans on the way to the bus (he was exhausted, can’t blame him). The cool thing is that he stopped for few young folks who’d seemingly never met him before.

        For me, it wasn’t a biggie that I didn’t meet him again, I’d still thoroughly enjoyed the show. Didn’t really try to meet him after other shows. I figured, if I met him again, fine, but I wasn’t gutted when it didn’t happen. Let someone else have a turn. Honestly, I can’t improve upon the meeting/pic I did get, so why bother? I’d be embarrassed, to be honest, to be in his face after every show.

        There are so many fans who can’t go to shows, not to mention all his international fans who haven’t even gotten a show yet. Some of the over-invested ones need to remember they’re very lucky they got to see one show, much less multiple ones.

        Meanwhile, when the show is over, he’s “off-hours” as it were, so to intrude on his privacy (I’m talking about instances of following him around/stalking him at casinos, restaurants, bars, etc.) is appalling.

        As for M/Gs, I like the idea someone said another artist did – limited each person to one M/G per tour. That’s the only way it’s fair. Some people angsted when they couldn’t get into the New York radio shows even though they’d gone to the CD signing and the hotel gig. Seriously? To be angry/angsty if you can’t meet him at all 4, 5, or 6 appearances he made in a week? Especially if you already scored some M/G passes to the other events?

        It’s pathetic. Enough should be enough.

      • Burt Says:

        songkat7 you touched on something else I really don’t understand – why can’t they understand that he’s tired after shows and doesn’t want to deal with all that shit? Fine for a few people here and there, or if it’s arranged like signing at the merch table – but there’s no way he can do it for everyone, every night. It’s not like they won’t see him at another show anyway.

        It’s just so disrespectful. I don’t think he is the only person having to deal with it so I suppose it’s a wider point about people in general. I’m not sure how you can claim to care about someone so much but then be happy to tire them out and add even more pressure to their touring life. People in the spotlight don’t always get to be “off” during their downtime, we all know that, but it doesn’t mean you have to put them in an awkward position, everyone has the option to ease off and be respectful even if you’re the biggest fan girl.

        Oh and I’m with you – I would be so embarrassed if he instantly recognize me just because I’d had 50 pictures taken with him, got my 75 CDs signed, been at every show and been at every competition-only show. It’s the wrong reason for someone to know you but the difference is, we’re aware of it.

      • songkat7 Says:

        Burt – So true – if he comes out to meet folks willingly, fine, but be respectful of him and others. But to invade his personal time is just wrong. Stalking him in a concert city to see which bar he is at, then texting your friends to report where he is? Wrong. How can people not see that, except that they really think he’s their buddy and wants to see them. Weird.

    • songkat7 Says:

      After one of his bigger shows, a small group of fans found out where the buses were and waited for him. When he came out, he was clearly exhausted and some of his family was with him, plus he had to get to another show a few hundred miles away. He asked the small group to not spread the word of where he was, and he then started signing for them and posing for pictures.

      Sure enough, a few of the regs who were there didn’t listen. Out came their phones, the texts flew, and suddenly there was a crowd. Because, of course, it’s not about him. It’s only about them.

  76. Mandy Says:

    Now some of his fans are complaining on twitter about those Meet and Greets. They are saying that Cook didn’t seem to have any problem with M&Gs and if he had any problem, he should have told the fans himself. They are now saying Cook’s lack of communication is the cause of problem with Ed. It’s funny that I hate the drama within the fandom but at the same time, I keep going back to those people’s timelines and reading their complaints when I have free time. It is not healthy lol.

    • Amusedbyfandom Says:

      The fact that near end of the Declaration tour David pretty much stopped doing the meet at the buses thing and was doing more formal venue or radio sponsored meet and greets should have been a clue for the met him 50x group. Does he need to spell everything out for these morons? Do other artists have to fucking hand hold their fans or include them in every damn decision they make?

      Unfortunately as far as Ed goes, he has made some good points especially in his post today, but his form of communication could be a little more PC and more specific. I wouldn’t even care if he named names so that the people causing the problems were out in the open so the rest of us weren’t all painted with the crazy brush.

      A few years ago U2 started ticket lotteries on their website because they were tired of the same people always in the front row. Fans got up in arms but they got over it. Sticking strictly to Idols, Daughtry started paid meet and greets. His fans howled but they got over it. There’s lots of ways to deal with M&G’s, David’s more vocal fans who think he owes them something for whatever reason will bitch because it’s what they do but they’ll get over it and regular normal fans will be ok with it.

      • Jen Says:

        He pretty much never came out in the northeast, presumably because there’s a high concentration of crazies up here. My friends saw Neal make a beeline back inside a venue as he was coming out upon seeing some of Krunk’s crew.

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Haha, can’t blame Neal for that, but doesn’t Krunkjess or one of her fellow Neal tards run Nealtiemann.com?

      • Amusedbyfandom Says:

        Shoot, hit post too soon, I wasn’t finished. Neal has posted blogs and done some sort of video interview for Nealtiemann.com. So if it’s run by Krunk, I guess he got over being skeeved out by her and her pals.

      • Ali Says:

        I understand Neal’s fansite is run by one of krunk’s friends. She claims to have nothing to do with it. It was one of the original “reg stalkers” named Stacy, she was always in Neal’s face, at every show. But for some reason, she just up and quit. Never post anywhere she used to, and hardly on twitter at all. Maybe she’s seen the light, or just didn’t want Neal seeing her as a “tard” lol.

  77. Ali Says:

    I’m sorry I missed it. My tardar is broken lately. I just have no stomach to fix it lol. What did Ed say about this blog to the tards? Good for him but unless Dave comes out, names all ther crazy asses and tells them to fuck off, they will think were all jeals haterz and pretend Dave rreally loves them, he’s speaking to some other tards not them lol! Pathetic. Thank god for this blog and thanks ED for trying to enlighten these fans who will humiliate Dave as usual by chasing away “normal” fans.

  78. Ali Says:

    LMAO! I was on my screwy phone and had to wait to get to my laptop to click the links and read ED’s post and the re-TARDS comments and outrage! I mean he called them out, asking them what we all say here “what would there long suffering husbands say”? Stop neglecting your families and real lives, for a pretend rocker boyfriend! My god some of them go as far as saying how there husbands love David too and also travel with them!? Really? I have yet to hear about of one of the diehards, toting along her hubby on the tour stalk? Anyone hear of such a man? Exactly…and the ones who are ok with them burning through the retirement fund to “support” there supastar, well they must be just so pleased to have the cow out of his hair for the months they leave to stalk the tour lol!

    I love how ED, jokes that he was halked haha. I can’t read those dumb comments but I suppose the weeds/roses were making excuses for Ed…they can’t see that obviously he is just saying what RCA and Dave would approve of…duh! Stupid fucktards!

  79. Ali Says:

    *hacked…not halked

  80. Dani Says:

    Still think Ed and Dave are one and the same

    • Ali Says:

      That would be so much poetic justice Dani, lmao!

    • nonna-muss Says:

      I would think that except that Ed also does the same thing at AO which is Madam’s official site. He’s done a few tard smack downs over there too.

      • Burt Says:

        Yeah I’m with Nonna. It would be funny but for it to be true it would have to be David using Ed’s ID and I just can’t imagine that happening. I also like to think he has other stuff to worry about/deal with on a daily basis.

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