Archive for September 2011

David Cook Tour 2: Where Are The Fuc Bunnies?

September 19, 2011

Back two years ago, close to the beginning of this blog, I had a number of posts about those nasty pests the Fuc Bunnies. They made a large part of the last tour very miserable for anyone behind them and behaved most obnoxiously with their signs begging for actions deemed illegal in some states.

Those posts are gone now because a number of the Bunnies complained to WordPress I’d violated their copyrights or some such nonsense. WordPress folded faster than Superman chugging espressos on laundry day. I’m sorry I didn’t save any of those photos and links because it was just so unbelievable, like something a sicko would make up for fiction. Sadly it’s all true.

I’m curious as it if they will reappear. They were shamed into silence by certain blogs and bloggers midway during the first tour. Top Idol wrote about them, I did and a number of others exposed their lair, a invision board with the odd name “Illusions of Cook”. Their videos are gone from YouTube. Deep bunny hiding in a burrow I guess.

Their specialty was showing up en masse to sit together right up front everyone wearing light up pink bunny ears. They would hold up signs that went from bordering on bad taste to outright obscene. Signs were spotted reading things like “We Masturbate” or “Play Fuck Her Gently” or offering various sexual services. Like this one for Neal –

I’m not going to show any of the other signs because they are pretty sick over all. Here’s a few fan comments about the Bunnies.

I also understand the idiots with the flashing bunny ears were holding up letter/signs that spelled out something objectionable, though I haven’t heard what it was yet.

And someone on DCO says that although the crowd was mostly fine, she did spot at least one pink puffy-painted ‘David Cook’ shirt, blech.

Don’t think I saw it posted but the same people who held up the DC fuc bunnies signs had a big one that said “We Masterbate” last night. I. Don’t. Get. It. No idea what they are trying to accomplish.

I was near the bunny ears on Friday. If any of the members of that group are members of our site, this is NOT the place that plan was hatched. DC’s fuck bunnies is indeed what their sign said. Other signs I saw from that section were “Master Cook” (which morphed to Master-bate on the dance floor at the club David was at Saturday night) and a giant Magnum condom. From my vantage, David did NOT look pleased with these signs. In fact, after the giant condom, he made a long exasperated sigh/grunt into the microphone (it was between songs).

I just saw that, too, and I don’t think it even needs to be said how very sad it is that he needed to post it, but WTF does it mean about attaching things to his bus? My first thought was some sort of GPS device, but that can’t be right, can it? Please tell me no one went that far.

on my cell but had to respond… it was bad.. they were in my section in the three rows ahead of me.. i have a pic of some of the ears lit up but have decided not to acknowledge them.. they were rude to everyone around them and acted like cookie was theirs.. and yes the sign spelled out fu*k.. andy was dying on stage horrified but laughing they were right in front of him.. seriously there were fans doing this who were old enoug to be his grandmother..

You’re right but there were two sets of signs. I didn’t post about the first set. I believe the first set just said “We say Master you say Cook” or something like that (something more SANE? Or maybe not but I couldn’t see that one as clearly since it was bigger and I was watching DAVID). He sort of acknowledged that one with an “oookkkkaaayyy?” but then later they reused the signs for the “We masterbate” which is why masturbate is spelled incorrectly. Or maybe they just think that is how it is spelled. I saw it with my own two eyes as did my husband as we were directly behind them (but several rows back).

Yes, yes Sanjayas#1fan, I did take these from Melinda’s Top Idol Blog. But I’m reposting them here so that those unfamiliar with the Fuc Bunny madness back in 2008/2009 can get the story since WordPress took down the *coughcoughUthie-Ray Loane-Saycoughcough* posting (damn, my pig latin is rusty) Props to Melinda for her awesome gathering. She posted about the Bunnies too.

The sickest moment in Bunny history is what I chronicled nearly two years ago that was deleted. There was a certain Bunny living in Ohio that was featured in either “Womans Day” or “Family Circle” magazine in an article about how the economy was affecting the average American. Miss Bunny and her husband complained in the piece about their fall from happy middle class with both of them employed to complete joblessness and hand to mouth existence. They claimed to be subsisting on Food Stamps, food bank charities, family members, government stipends and other things without any job possibilities on the horizon. What she didn’t say is that while they were undergoing this poverty she was following David Cook around the country from concert to concert with the other Bunnies. She even got one of her kids in on the act by having her hold one of the nasty F-worded signs. A kid, a six year old pre adolescent kid who shouldn’t even know what that word means. No financial support and she was blowing the few dollars they had on stalking an American Idol winner. Classy.

So… keep your eyes open this fall for pink bunny ear wearing women with crass signs even if the bunnies all seem skinned & fricasseed by now.

David Cook Fans Overreact (Again)..

September 18, 2011

… with some Crystal Bowersox and Adam Lambert thrown in for good measure.

Crystal Bowersox
First. I have to share this. A video of an actual Crystal Bowersox Frau fan losing it when Lee Dewyse (who?? Who who you say??) won American Idol in 2010. I didn’t even know she had tards! Sorry to see she also picked up crazy middle aged fans overinvested because I actually dig her music. It is the only Idol CD I bothered to download but I loves me some Blues and Crystal can sing ’em.

Crystal Frau Freaks Out

David Cook
So now the tickets and meet and greet tickets have been purchased for the upcoming Gavin Degraw slash David Cook tour. I heard that many blew ten bucks on buying memberships to Gavin’s website in order to try and get a jump on ticket sales only to wind up with really crummy seats and free access to presales at David Cook Official. C’est la vie. More karma for wacked out over involved fan behavior.

But the Cook crazy fan antics that amused me the most this week besides watching the Front Row Crew buy tickets and M & G packages for all the shows is the drama surrounding one of the hardcore pack, Debra. She’s apparently bought tickets, M&Gs, hotel rooms, airline tickets for most if not all of the venues and now she’s being picked apart on many boards and sites for greedily hogging access to the newly haired one, David Cook. Now, she’s crying that everyone saying that this is over the top unhealthy behavior are just all ‘nasties’ To quote Jen, if she really feels like what she’s doing is making her feel shame then perhaps she shouldn’t be doing it in the first place. Selling those extras might be the way to go.

Curiously some of the ‘weeds’ in fandom, like Wehoscott and Ladynsearch are suspiciously absent from the hoopla surrounding the new tour and the rest of the pack are doing their daily complaining about how RCA management is screwing everything up, or that there are no tour dates on the East Coast, that some M&G packages are already gone or the phases of the moon, the price of tea in China, you name it. This is one group of crazy that will never been satisfied, even if Cook came personally to each of their homes, romanced them all, put on a personal l-o-n-g concert and signed everything in their home from autos to cookware. They’d still find something to moan about.

Might be worth a road trip to York Pennsylvania to see the crowd in action. Will have to consider it.

Adam Lambert

Also, looks like Adam Lambert is starting to get the media attention because of his upcoming CD release. He will be on Lifetime’s “Project Runway” as a guest judge this week. Should be good for a few laughs. His fans have been quiet lately, not much amusing silly behavior to laugh at. Can someone enlighten me about his ‘new direction’? Didn’t he say something recently about ‘Glam’ being dead and he was headed in a new direction? What does that mean exactly because on the PR previews he’s got the old gel spiked ‘glam’ look going on still. I hope it means he’ll do something extremely bizarre, like Elizabethian ruffs and wigs or something equally old and outlandish just to see how the Sparkle Cows will try to replicate that look for themselves. Glammed up was funny enough.

I leave you with this… I wish this dude would audition for “American Idol” It would be enough to lure me into watching… maybe…his bouncing man boobs are hypnotic.

David Cook Tards: Fightin’ For A Space In The Front Row

September 12, 2011

Back in the stone ages when I was a mere 15 I used to be totally insanely mad about a band called Mott The Hoople. A very virile and masculine-looking bunch in high boots, glittery makeup and a lead singer that made Bob Dylan’s tunelessness seem like crystalline pure notes. I was so insane for them I hitchhiked up to big old bad NYC at 15 to see Mott and lure Peter Overend Watts into my hotel bed. Didn’t happen but he’s still a sexy devil even at his age. Lord Ove, hit me up sometime. I’d even let you fish for the carp in my 250 gallon rain water container. And other things.

But I digress remembering my ancient days of tarding even if Overend makes me want to tard hard again…

There used to be an old Mott the Hoople song I loved…

….and it included the lyric –

“Everybody hazy, shell-shocked and crazy
Screaming for the face at the window
Jeans for the genies, dresses for the dreamies
Fighting for a place in the Front row”

It’s that “Fighting for a place in the front row” that concerns me tonight. We’ve had a few Gavin Degraw fans visit here to recount their non-tardness but claim that they are always in the front row and will fight for that. This bodes ill because there are a number of Cook Tards that are expert front row obnoxicons. They’ve been known to step on feet, curse out, push, shove, elbow, sneer, insult, cry, yell and other tactical maneuvers trying to get near that young peen on the stage. How else do they get the fifty million crotch shots needed to squee over at DCO and the departed lair of Mary Ann Holly Sockpuppets DCU? Oh, won’t someone think of the droolers needing their millioneth happy snap of David Cook’s unpointing pants!

I’m not sure the Cook Tards are aware of it yet but tickets for the shows are already on sale at a special pay Gavin fan site, so it’s likely if it’s not a general admission show that the front rows will have already been snapped up. The Gavin fantards are getting them first, not Cook’s herd. Oh, the huge manatee!!

Has to be karma again considering how Ladynsearch, RoseC and others were busy whining to his brother, Andrew Cook, that Andrew wasn’t playing Cook songs. Andrew was in KC and was DJing over at, where he used to DJ when he lived in the area. The Cooktards were busy twittering and tweeting him their outrage over his betrayal of the bro by his music selections. As usual lots of ugly bashing of Andrew but at least he will tell them when they’re all behaving like See You Next Tuesdays. He told them off. None of them picked up on the fact that he did play a song that Cook had written for another band.

Add in the disgusting fetishisticness about everything to do with Cook’s appearance singing the National Anthem at yesterday’s Chief’s game and their silly belief that they got RCAEd fired (he’s not, dumbasses) and you have enough bad behavior to make bad karma take notice of the bunch.

PS to Lord Ove – I’m kidding (No I’m not!)

Warning Gavin Degraw Fans! Beware The David Cooktards!

September 4, 2011

So it’s announced that Cook and co are opening for Gavin Degraw come October. Good for Cook. Going out on the road again, seeing all the same old faces trying to stalk him again. Stacey will be there, Crazy Earring Lady will be there, Ninasfeet will be there, Svajgert, the whole gang and of course so will Andoyne Junkie, WeHoScott and the other self-proclaimed ‘Weeds’. NYCarole will be there, in fact she posted about her ‘excitement’

Ahhhhh… breathe NOW! Thanks for the update! Anticipation like this is akin to the best foreplay ever!! I’m RHWY David Cook!!


Girlfriend, if anticipation is like foreplay to you then I suggest you’re doing it all wrong. Just get you a man/woman/whatever off Craigs List and get laid. Please.

I pity the Gavin Degraw fans because they are going to be subjected to a whole lotta crazy behavior coming out of a sea of delusion, denial and demented. Particularly any of his fans that are youthful, pretty and try to be part of the front row crew.

The front row is the most nastily contested piece of real estate at a David Cook show. Certain nasty individuals consider it only their turf and will do, say, elbow, slam, nudge anyone that gets in their way.

Don’t believe me? Read on, I’ve posted a fan review from a gig during Cook’s last tour about what happened when a lady and her teenager tried to get upfront by being the first at the venue. And none of the behavior in this account is unusual, it happens at every David Cook show. Forewarned is forearmed. Plan to elbow ’em in the gut or put a spike heel through someone’s Croc.

Concert Recap – Western Illinois Univeristy, April 14, 2009.

My daughter and I walked downstairs to the venue at 0530. Yes, a.m. We wanted first in line, we got it. *laughs* For my fifth and final DC concert I wanted (for once) to be first in line and in the front row. We waited outside in the cold until about 0730, which is when the next group of girls showed up – Corrine and Shauna. The four of us grabbed couches right inside the door to the venue and waited there for more people to show up. Around 8:30 or so we were joined by a few more people…. And yes, they wound up kicking us out of the Student union and back outside.

So back outside we go…. Where we wait in line a few more hours. By this time the rest of our group and the other group arrives, so there are around 12 of us sitting outside. It’s cold… we are miserable….. I felt bad for a few who were battling colds and passing the tissues.

I have to say this, spending hours and hours with people and switching off bathroom and food breaks (not to mention hot chocolate because it was freezing)… we had a pretty good time. Talking and laughing and joking around. There was no line cutting, I told everyone I had four in my group; they told me they had six in their group… down the line …. It was a plan and it didn’t change.

So the Venue staff lines us up at 5 pm inside the doors. First in line and I’m ready to go. They then tell us that they are now going to rope off the front of the stage for a VIP area for those that won passes, faculty, kids, event staff etc etc. There go my dreams of front row. Again. I of course am upset. Then I get interviewed by the local TV Station…. “Yes I’ve been here since 0530. Why? To be at the front of the stage!” Just a short little interview.

Venue staff think it’s crazy but laugh and are going to make sure I get in front of the stage now (my daughter and I). The staff were GREAT – they moved the VIP Barricades and made a little area for us to go to at the barricades in front of the stage. However, when we got inside there the Staff Guy was like, “No, no… that will never do. Hold on, going to move the VIP rope down some so your closer to the stage.” We were in front of a speaker. So I tell my daughter “Get ready, as he moves the barricade over, scoot down.” No sooner does he move the barricade that my daughter is SHOVED into me and now Serena, Corrine and Shauna are now in front of the stage in the first row, where previously they had been behind my daughter and I. The security guy in front of me asks me “What just happened???” and the Staff guy holds his hands up in surrender. Not much they can do, right?

I (of course) voice my displeasure at this. I am even nice about it. Loud, but nice. Finally, the girls agree that they will switch places with my daughter and me. Serena, Corrine, and Shauna scoot down while my daughter and I move over next to the VIP section to get in front. I am then stuck and wedged next to the VIP area and my daughter. Serena, Shauna, Corrine and Stacey are now all front row, and there is no room to maneuver. Again, I am calm, and I loudly object (for myself and the other two people I came with who were now shoved into second row at that point).

Needless to say, I spent the entire show 2nd row with the other people I came with. My daughter was in front, and that would have to do, as no amount of screaming or yelling was going to get me back in front. Is this fair? No. Is this rude? Yes. You’ve all seen the posts about “those that shall remain nameless” or “the stalkers”. You’ve all defended them over and over. Can you defend them now? Is there ANY excuse they can give? Were they there at 0530? No. How did “I” wind up in 2nd row and them in the first row? Could I have knocked them flat on their ass and taken back my spot in the 1st row? Yes. But I didn’t. I yelled and screamed at them, and they ignored me. The security guard standing next to me in the VIP area offered to move them, but the show started and I told him to forget about it, don’t worry- he gave me HIS spot. (Still second row but behind a few little girls.) This behavior cannot be condoned and for all those posts on all the message boards asking for people to “call them out”. I am. Here. Loudly. And NOTHING is being said here that I did not say directly to Serena, Corrine, Shauna and Stacey. You shoved my daughter and me to claim your front row spot, then when you so graciously offered to move over to give her a better view, you moved yourselves up front and knocked three people to second row. Absolutely no excuse in my book.

The reason I am writing this? Everyone heard me screaming. Yelling. Swearing. It has been twittered, and I’ve been emailed and PM’d on all the boards regarding it. This is the story and that’s what happened. Why am I naming names? Because Serena, Stacey, Corrine, and Shauna really shocked me that they would be that bold as to SHOVE a 15 year old girl into someone else for a front row spot. Shocked the hell out of me. I have defended these women all over message boards that they are NOT stalkers and it is their right to get to a venue at 6 am for a front row spot. But if THAT is how you get a front row spot, you certainly don’t deserve it.

Everyone is entitled to show up early for a good seat, and you take your chances you will. The flippin’ venue GAVE US a front row spot, a good one at that. But no – I get screwed again by people I thought were friends of mine.

* * * * *

Anywho….. The concert started and it more than made up for the 14 ½ hour wait in the cold, and the drama immediately proceeding…… Ryan Star (as usual) was amazing. I’m sorry (again) I didn’t tell you the little girls were in front of me Ryan! *laughs*. My daughter was in seventh heaven when Ryan was playing right in front of her. A nicer guy you will never meet!

Dave and Ryan both rocked the house – if you’ve been to a concert you know what I’m talking about. You can’t find a better performer than David Cook. The Banter was great, and the energy was amazing!

We were outside at the buses after the show. Don’t think I have ever been quite that cold in my entire life! Couldn’t stop shivering. David came out sometime around midnight, but announced he wouldn’t have long. By the time he came to our end of the line he didn’t have time to do more than sign the back of my daughter’s phone and smile apologetically when I asked for a hug. Then he was gone. I was more than happy to head home and get warm after that!

I was disappointed that once again no hug or photo… but it’s expected. He spent a lot of time at the other end of the line, and we knew his time was limited. I was grateful my daughter got her phone signed as he was running thru the rest of the line! We heard Neal came out after Dave went in, and I missed that! I was so cold I left right after Dave flew by our end of the line. I’m 0 for 5 and as this is my last concert, so I’ll remain that way.

This happened at a gig that was geared primarily to college students and young people. The same old same old showed up. I don’t know how Cook didn’t go postal on this people before the end of the tour.

Heed my warning Degraw fans or suffer at the hands of these extremely rude and over the top people.