David Cook Sophmoronic Tour Starts
Sunday night Cook’s new ‘tewer’ started with a bang.. or be that a ripping sound? Caused by another nut and her pals. Dana from New Jersey (Disclaimer: NOT Daina Pizza Screamer from New Jersey. Another Dana.) had been man handling Cook when he was nearby during “Declaration”. Shortly thereafter on stage Cook’s leather pants ripped from ass to knee and the crowd went wild. Particularly after he mumbled something about the rip being a Dicklaration. The crazy Cooktards ate that up and it started off an endless round of speculations on them seeing his dick.
I’ve looked at the photos and it’s more penis wishful thinking. I doubt most of those tards have seen a real live penis in this century and would mistake all sorts of things for peen – a giant praying mantis riding a thermometer, rolled up socks, a banana or a rolled up copy of the Constitution of the United States.
This is the Tard fantasy of what was seen in those darkened grainy photos
Reality – far different than Tard wishes…
Idol Tards have always mistakenly thought all male Idols have huge schlongs while medical research in recent years says that the average penis is between 5 inches and 6.2 inches. That’s 87 percent of men worldwide. The percent with huge peen? A mere 4 percent. Unlikely that many or even any of the Idols are sporting anything beyond the average length, not that it matters anyway, but it seems to be an ongoing creepy concern of the Cooktards and all Tard groups.
Brian May Big Dick
Anyhoo, here’s hoping that Cook gets better hair that doesn’t look snapped on like a Lego Man’s and that the rest of this tour is filled with Tard Fail and amusement. Seems that some of the university gigs are making the middle aged non-student tard pack move to the back of the venue with the students right up front. That’s so awesome!Explore posts in the same categories: Uncategorized comment below, or link to this permanent URL from your own site.