Chick Fil A & the Summer of Crazy Hate

All this limelight focused upon Chick Fil A and their anti gay marriage stance has reawakened a long slumbering breast, err, beast, Ms. Kerry Kolsch and her American Idol conspiracy theories. Even a few of the religious sites mentioned her belief that homophobia caused Chick Fil A and AT&T to ban together to block Adam Lambert from winning American Idol.

Ever since Dan Cathy mentioned in an interview his stance on homosexual marriage I’ve been expecting the lunatic ravings of Kerry to explode online after she recovered from her initial seizure. Pages and pages, virtual reams about the repression of any form of homosexuality by Chick Fil A and the second place finish of Adam Lambert. I keep imagining her twitching and foaming at the mouth on August 1st, Chick Fil A Appreciation Day surrounded by the beasts of her alleged ‘farm’.

Yeah, I know, a book and reams of crap online she’s written over some guy wearing makeup winning second place on a tv show. Really. Of all the problems in this world, like global warming, the economy, health care, the war on women’s rights, gay rights and she chooses to be incensed over a television show that happened back in 2009? Yes, she does, still to this day.

Unfortunately someone over at The Advocate neglected to do any research on this bizarre princess of television conspiracy theories. They gave her theories some discussion in a legitimate article on Chick Fil A’s tendency to repress homos in an article. The writer lazily decided not to research her lack of validity and the fact that she is one of those wonderful internet laughing stocks. Someone needs to submit her name and story to the Encyclopedia Dramatica site. She belongs right up there with Liz Bateman and others. She’s morphed into an internet wide trolldom.

Someone at The Advocate finally figured out they had quoted a wackadoo as a source and altered the piece to indicate her lack of credentials. She trotted out her mother, disbarred Florida lawyer Elaine McKillop, to fight with her detractors in the comments. Now Kolsch has taken her toys over to Melinda Green’s blog  Top Iol to fight the laughing hordes there too.

Her ponderously long ravings about Adam Lambert barely interest me. What I find very interesting is all of her claims freely posted all over the internet that seem impossible or contradictory.

Example? Early in the whole Idol season with Adam she posted this over on the LA Weekly back in 2009. It’s still up, you cannot fake a date timestamp like she is claiming. Here’s that posting..

There should be a carbon tax on Ann Power’s hot air. She must pride herself on using a paragraph to express something that can be said in a sentence. Ann is the biggest fan of her own ego way more then she is a fan of Adam Lambert. Adam sang beautifully and nailed a difficult song and her complaint is that Adam accomplished what people expected Adam to do, so Adam should have chosen a different song more to her liking. Her incoherence is only matched by her verbosity.

Posted by: Kerry Kolsch | May 13, 2009 at 10:40 AM

and another comment with very similar wording also listed as from Kerry but this time from Yahoo article – http://

Ann, I totally disagree with you. Adam owned the stage as he does every time he performs. There was not contest between him and the other guys last night or any night. My husband, who is a university professor, has an instruction that he gives his speech class every semester, it applies to you, “if you can’t be good, be brief”. There should be a carbon tax on your waste of hot air.

Posted by: Kerry Kolsch | May 13, 2009 at 04:43 AM

In other posts from that time frame she’s claimed that she lives with her professor-husband overseas in England, yet she now claims to be an out and proud lesbian who’s never been married to a professor or lived in the United Kingdom? Lying?

Here’s her list of accomplishments that sound ridiculously fishy when viewed as a list.

  • Attended Nova Southeastern University Shepard Broad Law Center, which, as you can see is a prestigious school tanked up there with some of the worst junior colleges and study to be a medical technician joints you see advertised during daytime tv. 8th best law school in the state of Florida. Claims to be a Juris Doctor and have studied communications at Florida International University. Wonder what her SAT scores looked like?
  • Practicing Lawyer in Florida, but she never mentioned her mother and her were both involved in a real estate scam deal that resulted in her mother’s disbarment  in 2004
  • and according to this filed legal paperwork Kerry notarized a Deed that was proven later to have a fraudulent signature on it. You can see the document if you scroll down to the bottom. it is ‘Exhibit D’
  • Had or has a gourmet food truck
  • Claims to be a private pilot
  • Claimed to have  a degree in television production
  • Claims to speak 11 different languages but refuses to tell which ones. Pig latin doesn’t count.
  • Claims to be a prosecutor in the past
  • Claims to be an award winning salt dough artist
  • Claims to practice mostly Entertainment Law
  • Claims to have attened UCLA
  • Is thought to have gone by a number of aliases such as Kerry Haddad
  • Claims next door neighbors were FBI agents
  • Claims to have a farm filled with animals and goats in Central Florida yet has the free time to spent online spinning her Adam theories.
  • Claims to be a chef
  • Claims to have raised poison frogs for a living

I know I’ve missed a bunch so hit me up in the comments folks so that I might add to the list. It’s late here and I’m going to bed.

Explore posts in the same categories: Adam Lambert, American Idol, Crazy bitches, Fantards, Frau, Insane Fans, Kris Allen, once a loser always a loser, Sparkle Cows, Uncategorized

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13 Comments on “Chick Fil A & the Summer of Crazy Hate”

  1. nonna-muss Says:

    What a lunatic! She’s still at it? I remember reading about her a few years ago. I thought she faded into the woodwork way back when. She’s one stubborn bitch if nothing else! Off to read the crazy she’s posting over at Top Idol.

  2. Rubber Ducky Says:

    I’d hate to be her neighbor, what a hateful woman she is.

  3. Kerry Kolsch Says:

    As to you comments. I was never accused of any wrongdoing by the Fla. Bar. My mother was wrongly accused and is working on her reinstatement. At the time of her Bar hearing she was just out of the hospital and too ill to defend herself. She was railroaded without even one witness to testify against her. If you know anything about the law, if she was really guilty of what they claim she would have been charged with a crime in criminal court. She was not.

    As to the other statements. I bought a truck but than decided to move to a farm instead. My family owns famous restaurants in Florida so I may go back in the business again. I never claimed to be a pilot. My communication degree from FIU includes Television Production and I took a class at UCLA that was given by professionals in the movie/television business. The language claim, it is not 11, I was probable drunk, but the Kolsch’s have their own language. I was one of the youngest prosecutors in the Broward County Courts. Many law students intern in local courts. Some are asked to stay on as I was. I am an award winning salt dough artist. What is so strange about that? I made ornaments for John Elway and I designed a salt water tank for Jimmy Johnson when he was the Dolphin coach. I also desingned and installed the poison arrow frog display at Animal Kingdom at Disney when it opened. I have practiced Entertainment Law. I have entertainers in the family as well as other clients. I owned property with James Haddad. I never used his last name, but some sites with records have improper information. When I moved the FBI agents stayed in NMB. Why is that strange to you? Go to my twitter account and you can see pictures of my farm and animals. By the way, back in the days of the old LSAT scores mine was in the forties. You seem to make a very big deal out of things in my life because I have diverse interest. Why does that amuse you?

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      Go to my twitter account and you can see pictures of my farm and animals.

      You mean those photos that could be either ‘borrowed’, taken at a friends place or photoshopped? They prove nothing. Boy you’re a shitty lawyer if you think that’s evidence 😆

      And how many years does it take for your mommy to get her license back? 😆 I guess Florida isn’t quite so desperate for another shifty ambulance chaser then.

  4. nonna-muss Says:

    “The language claim, it is not 11, I was probable drunk, but the Kolsch’s have their own language.”

    Yes, you probably meant to type you speak 1 language, were drunk at the time and the the “1” key twice.

    I didn’t know one could make claims and blame it on being drunk.

    It’s me Nonna, I am really the Queen of England, I won the Miss America pageant last year, I own Apple, Inc. and I’m married to Brad Pitt. Ooopsie, never mind….I’m just drunk.

    Your atrocious spelling and drunken internet lies are two of the top qualities people look for in an attorney, no?

  5. Kerry Kolsch Says:

    People living in their parent’s basement and endlessly googling other people so that they can play “gotcha!” are the most pathetic beings on the earth. What the fuck difference is it to you what I do in my life? I am happy and will have another Adam Lambert book at Amazon soon.

    • nonna-muss Says:

      Yet you come back to see what we pathetic humans are saying. I’ll keep your upcoming tome in mind for my book club. We haven’t read in the humor genre in quite awhile.

    • Rubber Ducky Says:

      People living in their parent’s basement and endlessly googling other people so that they can play “gotcha!” are the most pathetic beings on the earth.

      😆 you must have gotten your lawler degree from a cornflake box. Don’t like being called out? Stop lying every fucking day then 😆

      will have another Adam Lambert book at Amazon soon.

      Excellent, I love badly spelled obsessive books about drivel! So how many sales are you hoping for this time around, Kerry? Ten?

  6. Jason Says:

    Who fucking cares about all this meaningless shit? Adam Lambert is Gay. It’s WHAT is is, but not WHO he is.

    Who is he? A MASSIVE failure in popular music.

    • freedavidcook Says:

      It IS meaningless shit. I just wanted to see if a certain someone had managed to make the quick leap from her theories of Chick Fil A gay-hating on Lambert enough to fail to the recent Chick Fil A brouhaha. It’s all very interesting to me…

      His CD has fallen off the charts and I’m looking for RCA/Sony to drop his ass any day now. Then we’ll see what stupid conspiracy theories the Cows will come up with then..

  7. Black Angel Says:

    This actually does not surprise me. Obsessive Idol fans are all alike. Most of them have varying degrees of mental problems. This lady, Kerry Kolsch, is one of the more severe cases.

    Kerry, it is not normal to be this obsessed over something so stupid. Get help.

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