Posted tagged ‘Constantine Maroulis’

Unchained Melody? Bitch Please!

March 30, 2011

Looks like the potential for an idiot fan war is supah high right now. Too bad it’s not the Cooktards and the Sparkle Cows squaring off. That I’d pay to see.

Nope, it’s the internut rumble will be between the fans of Constantine “Greasy-skeavy butt-sexing-teenagers” Maroulis and Clay “Oops I ruined my face” Aiken. Turns out that on Clay’s last cd he recorded ‘Unchained Melody’ and now Constantscum has done the same thing. Cons fans are expecting him to sing it on ‘American Idol” this week.

Right now it’s only a few fans that have realized that Constantine has recorded the same song as Clay and are grumbling about it but expect it to turn into a full fledged stupids rumble if Conny sings it on this weeks AI. The explosion in Clayland will be epic as they rush forward to attack Contards by proclaiming that the song belongs only to Clay from now on. Waves upon waves of stupid.

Speaking of stupid, I’ve been watching the fall-out and comments on the People magazine article of Constantscum and his bambino. The whole nasty gang has been at it, Studiolady (cough, cough, usually an L. Anne pseudonym or Debbie), Judyes (she who once street-teamed a parrot) and a host of other familiar names. The comments are worth the uncomfortableness of the pictures of Constantine whoring out an innocent child for publicity – People Magazine.

The baby’s Momma, pretty Angel Reed, has started a blog with some very nice photos of the baby and herself too as well – Angel Reed’s blog. Proud momma and beautiful pictures of the baby. What makes the blog both wince-worthy and comical at the same time is that Constantine’s same fans that were busy bashing momma during the pregnancy and afterward, are busy signing up as followers and kissing Angel’s derriere right now. I predict the moment she says something on the blog they dislike they will turn on her like a pack of ravenous piranhas on an innocent lamb that wandered into the water.

I wish Angel and Malena well and to stay far far away from the insano Contards like Little Skatertard and others just as nutty.

Freakin’ Golden!

February 1, 2011

So I didn’t think I would be posting but there is just so much delicious stuff happening in the American Idol over the top fan-world not to. Lots to talk about, lots of different fan bases.

Looks like Adam Lambert’s sacred Sparkling Cows neglected to get him that Maserati for his birthday a few days ago. I also saw no evidence in the tweetings and postings of the herd about the discussed heavy silver cuff bracelet they were supposedly going to have custom made for him. I did however see all the good, bad and the ugly fan party cakes posted over at that fun place better known as Top Idol. Take a look at the cakes and the fan videos if you need a good laugh. Black and purple frosting just tastes super nasty no matter how you slice that cake.

Can someone rationally explain to me this making of cake for someone who doesn’t even know you exist and will be be feasting on it? It just comes across as very creepy and emotionally over invested.

Also, is it my imagination or has Adam been dabbling with cheap cheap plastic surgery? His cheeks and jaw line post-tour are looking like he’s been having filler injected, like maybe knockoff Restylane. Something has tweaked his face and not for the better.

Speaking of American Idols who have been unkind to their faces via plastic surgery…

It looks like Clay Aiken’s tour, Moneyless,…. err, I meant Timeless must not have been very financially lucrative. There are rumors out that Clay is just about on the knife’s edge of poverty. He’s trying to sell his gaudy mansion and has nothing really lined up for the future. I’m sure paying off all the guys he’s had dirty trysts with is a severe drain on his finances. The Clay Aiken Fraud Squad has been talking about his lack of dough lately in their comments section. Decca dropped his ass like like a little girl with cooties wearing last years couture.

How much longer before Clay goes back to teaching school?

Word in Hell Lay is that David Cook is busy hiding from his usual crowd of idiot stalkers. Poor guy can’t even have a nosh of Red Velvet Pancakes at his favorite griddle place without the LA stalkers getting wind and racing over. He’s been a no show at most of the concerts and happenings involving his band members because that gang of creeps keeps showing up like poisoned mushrooms after the rain. That’s too sad because I have heard that most celebs like the anonymity that living in Los Angeles. Not for Baldy. No safe place unless he starts donning a disguise.

The sad thing is the LA Stalkers seem to erroneously believe that they are his BEST FRIENDS EVAH!!

And what the heck is going on with his sophomore album? Very very quiet out there.

Last but not least it looks like Constantine Maroulis’ few remaining fantards are picking on one of his ex-tards, the one I like to call Little Skater Girl because she looks like a child or perhaps a sufferer of Turner Syndrome. She has seen ‘Rock of Ages’ about a million times but recently portable slime Conny said something to her that put her completely off The Greasy One. Conny’s few faithful are busy beating their gums trying to figure out what he said and sticking the knife in her back for dropping Constantine like her falling on fanny during skating practice.

That’s too bad that Little Skater Girl is no longer lusting for Constantine because I love her. She is love. She is my favorite one in the fandom. How could you ever hate on someone brave enough to use American Idol music as their performance music?

Feast your eyes on her –

Stopped watching the American Idol auditions. It’s just not that interesting now.

American Idol Season Ten

January 20, 2011

Soooo what did everyone think of last night?

According to The Huffington Post there were 13 percent less viewers than last year. Big surprise. The shark has been jumped last year. I don’t think any amount of pithy colorfully vulgar sayings by Steven Tyler or fake sympathies by J Lo are going to help.

I’m not going to recap it because there are tons of brilliant recaps out there including the one at Top Idol by the ever lovely Melinda Green. I hope you got to see her on MTV’s post-Idol wrap-up show last night? I’m going to just throw out a few impressions of stuff that stood out to me.

– Randy Jackson can speak whole sentences and express logical thoughts. I like this Randy better.
– J Lo wasn’t as bad as I thought she would be. However, as the season drags on I hope she reverts to form. If not it’s going to be one boring long season.
– Was it really necessary to have Greasy McSkeevy Constantine Maroulis open the show for his millisecond of fame whoring?
– Thankfully Steven Tyler hasn’t had any extreme real recent tucks and plumpings. His last few plastic surgeries left the dude looking like a lady-dude. But I don’t see how it’s possible for him to make it through the season without resorting to chemicals. Doing that weekly would sure make me drink like Prohibition is right around the corner and I had a still to finish off.
– Contestants, sort of boring and tended to blend one into the other with the exception of the silly little girl from the Carolinas.
– Same old same old. Whatever happened to shaking things up?

We watched as a family, all four of us, because we love watching the bad auditions. My daughter Laura and I made special cookies for the viewing fun. J Los.

J Lo Cookies (just modified Chocolate Chip recipe. I’d post a picture but I couldn’t find my camera last night)

1 stick butter
3/4 cup brown sugar
3/4 cup white sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon butternut flavoring
2 2/3 cup flour or for a gluten free cookie use a mixture of almond flour and superfine brown rice flour.
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper (your choice)
1/2 cinnamon
1 bag gourmet chocolate chips, some high end brand like Girardelli whatever a rich bitch would use.
1 cup nuts, your choice. We used walnuts.

Beat sugars and butter together until light and fluffy. Add eggs, vanilla and butternut and mix well. Add all the dry ingredients and mix well until the consistency of chocolate chip cookie dough. Add chips and nuts. Taking your two tablespoons drop two rounded spoonfuls side by side so that as the cookies bake you have two round ass cheeks as one cookie. Bake at 350 degrees until they are as brown as J Lo’s ass. Enjoy.

Remember! Wait for her ass to cool before taking a big bite. They go well with bland white milk.

Tonight’s Idol is from my home town of New Orleans, Louisiana. Ahhh, Nawlins in mid summer sweat, hotter than hot, humidity stuck on stupid high. Tourists fainting left and right in the heat and Idol wanna bes cooking in the summer sun. Between the heat factor, drunkenness, weirdness of the city and the local wackos there should be more fun in tonight’s episode. Bring on Chipcoon! Team Coonass!

Liz Lambert – Faux Cancer Adam Lambert Fan & Others

December 9, 2010

I’ve been watching the LizLambert scandal brewing over at various Adam Lambert boards and on Twitter. I’m shocked and not shocked at the same time that someone would willingly pretend to have terminal cancer to catch the attention of the headliner.

Apparently Liz’s goal was to get Adam and his band members to Twitter her. She accomplished this before being busted as a faker. Reprehensible on all levels. For once I am in agreement with the Sparkle Cows. (Is Satan ice skating yet?) Pretending to have a terminal illness to gain the attention of others is a truly horrible thing to do. She obviously has only a limited idea of what being a cancer patient is like. From this cancer survivor married to another cancer survivor this pretending of hers to get a Tweet from Adam is disgusting, but not surprising.

In all fandoms of American Idol there are those in every season that fake serious illnesses to garner attention of the fans and the headliner. It usually ends with the faker outed and pretending that what they did wasn’t so bad, fomenting different ridiculous excuses why this was okay.

Psychiatrists have a term from this sick fakery. It’s called Munchausens By Internet.

You remember Baron Munchausen don’t you? He told tall tales of derring do. Among his claims is that he pulled himself up from sinking in a swamp by his own hair, that he traveled to the Moon and that he rode cannonballs in battle. He was a witty man known for recounting highly embroidered adventures that could in no way be true. Fantastical tales and the reason that Munchausen’s Syndrome is named after him.

Dr Feldman believes that Munchausen’s is driven by “longing for nurturing, sympathy, care and concern that they feel unable to get in appropriate ways,” Perhaps but it doesn’t explain or account for the damage done by the perpetrator, who is rarely remorseful.

Feldman also created a list of common Munchausen’s By Internet tip-offs. I am reposting them here so that those in all fandoms can be informed.

* Medical literature from websites or textbooks is often duplicated or discussed in great detail.
* The length and severity of purported physical ailments conflicts with user behavior. Feldman uses the example of someone posting in considerable detail about being in septic shock, when such a possibility is extremely unlikely.
* Symptoms of ailments may be exaggerated as they correspond to a user’s misunderstanding of the nature of an illness.
* Grave situations and increasingly critical prognoses are interspersed with “miraculous” recoveries.
* A user’s posts eventually reveal contradictory information or claims that are implausible: for example, other users of a forum may find that a user has been divulging contradictory information about occurrence or length of hospital visits.
* When attention and sympathy decreases to focus on other members of the group, a user may announce that other dire events have transpired, including the illness or death of a close family member.
* When faced with insufficient expressions of attention or sympathy, a forum member claims this as a cause that symptoms worsen or do not improve.
* A user resists contact beyond the Internet, by telephone or personal visit, often claiming bizarre reasons for not being able to accept such contact.
* Further emergencies are described with inappropriate happiness, designed to garner immediate reactions.
* Other forum members post on behalf of a user, exhibiting identical writing styles, spelling errors, and language idiosyncrasies, suggesting that the user has created fictitious identities to move the conversation in their direction.

Dr Feldman neglected to mention the worst case of Munchausens By Internet I’ve ever seen. No, it’s not Kaycee Nicole. It’s the online activities of one Lori Anne Dennick, or as she insists on being called L. Anne Carrington. Right now L. Anne is pushing a horribly written and partially plagiarized ‘novel’ around on various vanity publishing sites. She’s claiming that she’s on the verge of publishing this book. It was available on Barnes and Noble website as an ‘E Book’ recently before being removed. It’s up on Amazon. This book has been up in pieces for free on Authonomy and other book sites for over a year now.

She’s complaining about the time it’s taken to get this out and edited even if it’s only been a few short months since she started claiming to have a publisher. She has no clear idea obviously about how the real publishing process normal works, just like all the other times she’s claimed various things that were easily provable otherwise. I’m not going to go over the laundry list of her lies – they are available over at

Anyone serious about their work usually starts by obtaining a literary agent. Which in itself can take quite a while. You contact the agent and if they are interested they will ask for a few short examples of your work. At that point they sometimes ask for a few beginning chapters or sometimes the entire manuscript. Just this process can take months to accomplish.

If you’re one of the lucky few they’ll agree to represent you and start working on selling your book to a publisher. More delays of many months.

Once a publishing house buys your work then you are assigned an editor and the rounds of revisions start. You edit, they edit, usually multiple times. It is unheard of for a book not to be relentlessly edited. The galley proofs are issued to you and the editor and you both had to go over it one last time before it goes to press. The entire process can take more than a year.

Of course, all of this is assuming that you have a literary agent. If you don’t have one then tack on another 6 months or a year as your unsolicited manuscript sits in a slush pile waiting for some flunky to read and send you a rejection letter. You MUST get a literary agent to be taken seriously in the publishing world unless you’re a celebrity.

Which means all of Lori Anne Dennick’s raving about her book is only slightly more real than LizLambert’s cancer.

Keep your eyes open for these irritating Munchausen By Internet perpetrators. Not even the Glamberts deserve them.

ETA: L. Anne Carrington is claiming mere hours after having been exposed as a fraud yet again that she now has a literary agent. This is the most bassackwards publishing of a book I’ve ever heard of. More like the desperate elaborations of a bad liar.