Posted tagged ‘Taylor Hicks’

Adam Lambert Sparkle Cow Says Queen Fans Are “Tards”

March 3, 2012

I got a comment on the other post positing that Queen fans are also ‘Tards’ from a Sparkle Cow. Here it is..

Whats the term you are using here a lot about David Cook “tards”: entitled fans or something like that? Seems to me there is suddenly many entitled Queen fans telling Brian May what to do with his band. A bit funny, that.

I had to answer them because they still don’t get it. But why am I surprised since they are stuck in a delusion they have been trying to rationalize away for three years now. It’s really about the music.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

No, there is a difference. Queen fantards do not do the crazy things that Idol fans seem to do. I’ve yet to hear of a flat Freddie or Brian May being toted around, birthday parties being set up with decorated cakes, trackers stuffed under buses, tattoos of band members or lyrics on someone’s feet or back. Granted there are always tards in most every fan pack, but I am just not seeing the same percentage or level of crazy that Idol fans bring.

Thinking the difference is that Idol contestants are on television for weeks on end, allowing those that aren’t real music fans to feel ‘connected’ to the Idol because of the tv exposure, hence the crazy overconnection i.e. pararelationalism that occurs. People who’s primary concern is the actual music would never act like that, just the ones that see something pretty and sparkly on tv and project all their desires upon, like the Sparkle Cows.

Basically most of the Idol contestants and some (many) of the winners are nothing more than televised karaoke singers. Daughtry isn’t. Bowersox isn’t. and there aren’t too many more than aren’t.. Nicki McKibbin has potential.

And it isn’t always their own fault. Guys like Cook hone their stagecraft by years of playing other peoples music in cover bands in bars throughout the country. Taylor did that. I can’t explain Clay Aiken, there is no explanation except to say the site is getting an unusual number of hits asking if he’s had plastic surgery, or did he do the female to male surgery pre Idol or is he doing the male to female surgery now. All very puzzling.

But it really does all go back to the music, which is what all you tards forget, falling in love with some guy you see on tv and listening to any stupid dreck he might record.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the comments below the Sparkle Cow someone pointed out that Queen is not Brian May’s personal band to do what he wants with. He was part of it, not the main part of it. Queen started out as four separate dudes with the same stake in the band.

What Not To Do: David Cook, Adam Lambert, Taylor Hicks, Whoever Fans

January 23, 2012

A couple of fans posted online prime examples of just what you really DON’T want to do to attract the notice of anyone, much less your favorite American Idol. Kind of reminds me of this Weird Al Yankovic song parodying the musical stylings of Taylor Hicks.

First up is a silly page some lone Taylor Hicks frau posted ages ago as ‘advice’ to meet Taylor. Thanks Black Angel for posting this in the comments. It’s a primer of what NOT to do. Just do the opposite of what this stalker-frau says.

1. Look up when he is having a show. You can go to his website or follow him on Twitter @TaylorRHicks and on Facebook.

Okay, so there’s nothing wrong with looking up where anyone will be playing..can’t object to that.

2. Send him a message, so he will be familiar with you(optional)

Yeah, you do that so he can print off your photo and name to give to his security team with strict instructions to keep you far far away from him.

3. On the day of the concert, if it is General Admission get there around lunch time(Unless the concert is a hometown concert, then you need to get there around 6am) The Soul Patrol does camp out in any kind of weather!

Camping out for anyone is a sign that you’ve already slipped over the edge into over involvement in your mind only and tard dom. Put down the sleeping bag and go wait till a reasonable hour like a sane normal person, not some crazy cat lady waiting for a new batch of kittens at the pound.

4. Talk to the fans that come up. And get familiarized with Taylor and his band members. Most of the time, Taylor sends them out to distract fans so he can run inside and do soundcheck.

If Taylor, or anyone, is getting people to distract that masses so he can run inside for the soundcheck then you’ve already entered the zip code of Crazyville. Don’t add to the population, allow the poor beleaguered and hounded headliner to pass unmolested.

5. If it is a casino show and you are inside the casino, realize, Taylor Hicks may have passed by you one hundred times and you did not even know it. Soul Patrol knows the disguise and where to look for Taylor and his friends. And try to book a room at the hotel, if you want to stalk Taylor.

The writer realizes what she’s trying to do is not normal and for once calls it what it is, stalking. If Hicks or any other Idols are walking about in disguises it’s surely because the fans are acting like K Mart shoppers during a Blue Light Special. Just don’t.

6. Try not to stalk him. You will end up on his hate list.

But,,, but…you are advocating stalking in everything else on the list.

7. Find fans that do not seem, obsessed. They are most likely cool with the band!

Sooo you’ll stand out as the crazy one in the ‘normal’ bunch?

8. Try to get in the front row. Dance, sing, holler, correct him on the lyrics, and he will notice you. Or make a giant rainbow poster confessing your love for him. Seriously, dont do that!

Advocating typical front row frau antics that have been going on in every frau pace. How is correcting the singer singing his own lyrics going to garner you positive attention? He’s just going to think you’re an assclown and he’d be right.

9. Dont leave right after the concert is over, unless the house lights come on. Taylor always comes back on and do two or three more songs, depending on how he feels.

I believe this is known as an ‘encore’ and most performers do it, unless there’s a hot blonde and a pile of Peruvian Marching Dust a foot high awaiting them in the dressing room.

10. Depending on how big the crowd is, that is your chance to really get to know Taylor. Talk with him about sports, but dont drag on and on forever. Buy a CD or print off a picture of him to sign.

When last we left off our Taylor Tard she was talking of encores. How did we get from encores to chatting about sports? How ’bout them Packers?

11. If the show is at a casino, or has a place with a bar, or if a bar is nearby, that is where Taylor is! But if you do run into him again, don’t be all up in his business.

Yeah, just try to buy him a million drinks so he’ll pass out and not notice you’re trying to gargle with his balls. Smooth move.

More sage ‘advice’

No Stalking
Don’t badmouth Taylor around fans
Don’t act all creepish around people.
Do NOT get wasted drunk.
Do not put your hands all over Taylor
Get there EARLY!

I heard that this particular author did get wasted at a Taylor concert so I guess she knows.

If not careful, you could possibly be banned from all Taylor shows. A Taylor Hicks show is pretty simple to attend. And it is really fun!

Sweetheart, I’m sure he added you to the list the second you started spamming him on Twitter that you were coming to see him real soon.

Then she lists supplies you should bring for your attempt to ‘stalk’ ooops, ‘meet’ him.

Camera(a good one. His fans love to show off all the picture they have taken.)
Picture(for an autograph)
Breath mints( if you are going to make your move)
Water
Pen
Cellphone
Energy

Strangely enough the things you know she’s dying to bring, like lube and a ball gag, are strangely absent from the list.

Earlier this week we saw other do not repeat behavior from Cook fan. Look at this Twitter timeline. The author deleted the tweets but while they were up she was melting down over David Cook or even Andrew Cook not twittering her back. Ha. Read from the bottom up on the tweets…

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i can’t believe i did it for someone like u.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
can ignore me. i’ll do too.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i wanted one thing u don’t know to do. simple. talk.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i don’t want a gdbye. i wanted was a hello.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
someone that just do.. sing songs gdbye!!!!!!!!!!!

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i’m frustrated? nope.. in panic with me. hw i can be so stupid?

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
to me lixando!

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
u just think in fortune… put it in ur ass..

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
but i’m wasting my time..

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
don’t matter to me what u are? famous or not.. to me lixandu!

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
answer with ur face without send others to do it for u.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
know for more crazy…” the less” u’d should to do is answer.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i’ll let to u think in ur atitude to someone here that wrote to u.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
u know what i really miss. be so stupid in think that u could answer me as a man. and not as a child.ur atitude is so..

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
and nope mr.andrew wont have fight anymore. i know what is a NOT.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
and more this guy deserve receive all love .. all girls.. be happy with ur girls.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
i deserved. write words to a piece of the stone.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
thank u for all ur hard time to read here and answer me with kind “jokes”

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
and more… today u show me what i shouldn’t do anymore.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
hw stupid i’m. think that u’ll could like someone like me. but i have a heart to say what i feel..and i know say sorry. and receive one NOT.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook what do u think…. was funny watched a stupid here.. good. ur words will help me

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook or so say stupid shut up! i don’t want any with u.. u don’t see… i’m much for u!

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@thedavidcook u could just have said.. stupid woman stop to write.. cause i don’t like u.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@thedavidcook hw can u ignore a person like u do?

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@thedavidcook and wrost do jokes…. Have u one heart? u read it?

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook i just wanted understand hw can?

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook hw can a man ignore and be so cold.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook no.. i don’t understand hw can a man read it and be so cold. and haven’t one word to say.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@MrAndrewCook just tell me hw can someone to be so cold. so ice.. one piece of a stone.. that haven’t a HEART!

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
sorry… for write fools … again hurt myself here. i’m stupid.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
well. i think i haven’t any to do here … i already read what i needed … and i know what is one NOT.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
eh. cool show. was funny….that good someone liked here.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
let me lov u.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
youtube.com/watch?v=bjBqp2…

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
don’t matter. i still can dream with a true love.

MarcyaLin Marcya Lin
@thedavidcook can survive a love in distance? question for u?

Don’t do this. Please don’t do this to anyone.

American Idol Significant Others (David Cook, Taylor Hicks, Adam Lambert)

August 21, 2011

We’ve been talking in the comments on the probability that David Cook hasn’t been leading a lonely celibate life. I’m sure the Weeds and the Roses love to picture him wearing a human hair shirt and monks robe subsisting on saltpeter mixed with manna to preserve the purity of his instrument and to save himself for them.

Charming picturesque vision that it might be to some (ugh, it creeps me out!) I’m sure it’s not true. He’s a man, a healthy young male, so I’m sure he has suitable female companionship just like I’m sure it’s none of our business. He is entitled to his privacy if he so desires.

Unfortunately some of the Twitter brigade have started tweeting him begging for a date or rudely inquiring about the state of his love life, neither of which are appropriate behavior or their business. Just like that stupid dating survey they posted at DCO ages ago, filled out and presented to him. LOL-worthy. I loved the video of the presentation because Cook looks so much like he’s on the verge of bursting out in big braying laughs. I often wonder how much of a laugh does he and the guys in the band get over the more ridiculous tard behavior.

And thanks to YoTaylor in the comments I got to see that the tard hazards of dating an American Idol aren’t just something Cook has had to deal with. Taylor Hicks fans got ridiculously out of the box harassing and speculating when he was dating news lady Caroline Lyders. Looking around at the uber bitching online about how Caroline is the devil to Hicks fans I’m laughing. This is so typical,. the harassment and lies invented by the emotionally overinvested. I still don’t get the big honking deal it was that Hicks was spotted with a different blonde in Hawaii. He could be dating more than one person at a time. It is possible and it doesn’t mean that Lyders is some sort of beard like the worst of the Taylor Tards tries to say.

I would love it if Lyders would show up here and let us know about the harassment she suffered from at the hands of Hicks idiot pack. I’m sure she has tales to tell that rival Lana Jade’s.

That’s one big advantage that Adam Lambert has over Taylor Hicks or David Cook. Being that he’s gay his crazy ott fans seem to adore his boyfriends, from Cheeks to present. Unless of course you point out that their hair looks suspiciously like those guys on Dragonball Z. Then they go all creamed crap on crackers. The comments are priceless and crazy.

I wonder what would happen if Adam decided he wanted to date a woman and be bi. How crazy would his herd get?

American Idol Chow-Chow: David Cook Tards, Adam Lambert Award? & Taylor Hicks Has 2 Tards.

August 14, 2011

Can you tell I’ve been canning the abundance of summer vegetables? The only thing I could think of that’s a mixture of lots of weird stuff was Chow-Chow. Today’s post is a weird mixture, like what’s left in my garden. Warning: this is going to be long, like my endless canning this week.

    David Cook’s Tards Go Psycho…Again

Let’s see, first updates on the Xavier/RoyalsPhenom fiasco of trying to get Cook’s song “We Believe” used during various 9/11 ceremonies this September. After contacting people like the mayor of NYC, Dick Vitale and a cast of hundreds with his tacky scheme to blanket the nation with this song now he has been utterly silent for nearly two days. What happened? Did RCA slap him with a cease and desist? Did he fall face first into a bucket of self-awareness? Or is he just at a series of Royals games without internet? Doesn’t matter. It’s all good.

WeHoScott also seems to be silent, only posting on his locked twitter that he is nose to the grindstone at work. Good. That’s what he needs to be doing.

But other tards have not been. Sassycatz issued this thinly veiled threat towards David Cook: “Sassycatz twitter. com/#!/Sassycatz
@thedavidcook we want to help you, but we can’t help you when we are ignorant. In fact, we can hurt you. Can you throw us a bone some time?”

Whoa, “we can hurt you.” sounds like a threat to me, even if it’s just a promise to stop their silly attempts to make the world think he’s king of music. But “we are ignorant” jumped out at me more. No truer words have been posted in the fandom. They are ignorant, ignorant of the business, ignorant of Cook’s real wishes and career plans, ignorant of what most fans do.

Usually being a fan of someone’s music works like this: You hear the music, you buy the CD. You go to the gigs, you buy the merch. THAT is what helps your musical idol, NOT endlessly tweeting belligerent demands for updates, not constantly disparaging their management and record label, not endlessly speculating on front potato or rumors or woulda shoulda couldas, not plotting to meet him, put a tracker on their tour bus (more on this later), ignoring your family to blow what little money you have to stalk them. Take a deep breath, step back from crazyland before you end up like this.

ljrTR twitter. com/#!/ljrTR

Lack of dc news is curing my twitter addiction

E that glammie gets mor p.r. tha dc & dc is the one w the new cd right now

Wonder if this was a productive week DC? (why do i still care?)

Is there any reason to check for DC news anymore?

nt sure my fave singer has ny career to follow any more

I joined twitter to follow wonderful singer David Cook. now i follow wonderful liberal bloggers

wait 4 almost 2 yrs 4 cd;it’s great but flops;no tour to promote said great cd; only 1 poss single which flops. FRUSTRATION

I’m passionate. I’m patient. I’m also sad and discouraged

I want the best for DC but am so discouraged

agreed. new management, something

I think somewhere a mental facility has empty rooms awaiting if you go into that territory of emotional involvement. It’s just not healthy for anyone.

    Adam Lambert Wins Best Gay In LA?

I don’t care if Adam is gay, straight, omni-sexual or whatever. I really don’t. But someone tweeted me this link and I am left asking why? They say because he’s a gay role model but really, I wish they would have given the award to one of the activists on the front lines of the fight for repeal of “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” or working with bullied LGBT youth to prevent suicide, or one of the many tireless workers trying to make sure that LGBT people can marry. They are the real heros. Lambert has been notoriously uninvolved in the causes to advance society acceptance of LGBT people as just people, not evil. Looks like he got the award because he’s gay and he’s famous.

    Taylor Hicks Last 2 Tards Tard Hard For Upcoming Gig

I have been laughing my ass off this week watching the comments over on the Facebook page of Perdido Key’s Florabama Lounge and Liquor Store. I’ve been following Florabama on Facebook for eons because when I was growing up we had a family beach house in Orange Beach, Alabama, spitting distance from the Florabama. Good times, many days/nights at the Florabama eating pizza. I’ve played music with my ex husband at the Florabama, saw Jimmy Buffett perform at the Florabama before he was famous. The place holds lots of memories for me.

So I was highly amused to see that Taylor Hicks and a couple of bands he was connected to are booked to play at the Florabama in September. He’s also played there before he was on Idol. Pretty much anyone ever in the music business South of the Mason-Dixon has played at the Florabama.

The thing that makes him playing at the Florabama full of funny for me are the comments by the few Tay-Tay Tards versus the Regulars on Facebook.

Shannon R E gross why …
Nadine S I wish I were there to go! Taylor is an AWESOME performer!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dan C No. It wont sell out if they had a year to set it up!!There will be plenty of seats , they only need about 50 !
Tony K L a m e ….take the soul patrol somewhere else
Darryl C I’d just as soon see Big Earl
Dan C He sucks!
Sherri C G That boy couldn’t sing his way out of a paper sack! I’d rather listen to nails on a chalkboard!!..YUCK!!!!!…​I’ll pass!….ROFL.
Lacey C P I love Taylor!!!! All of you haters prolly cant hum a tune. He has done and experienced things none of yall ever will. So hating on him only makes you look like asses. I LOVE YOU TAYLOR KEEP ON SINGING AND DOING YOUR THING!!!!! YOUR NUMBER 1FAN!!!!! SOUL PATROL !!!!!
Britton C Boy…he is a real popular act right now. Burning up the charts aint he?
Tony K Number 1 fan? Maybe his ONLY fan…
Lacey C P Like I said haters……he has been on one of the biggest shows American Idol and won it. Also doing broadway. What have any of you done lol . Downing people for their dreams is crappy. That is his dream and I think he has went for it and has done a good job. Congrats Taylor hopefully I can come cheer you on.
Lorraine S i was hoping someone better,ugh;/ will be there that weekend
Bob I Seriously? Taylor Hicks? Seriously? Seriously???? He sucks! Go soul patrol….LOL. Is Sanjaya his warm up act?
Dan C If parking was free , tickets free No cover charge , free beer, half price bushwhackers and I had a free day , I would go get a bushwhacker , and mow the lawn, again , in the rain I might add,

I left out some of the standard “You’re just a talentless jellus hater” comments by such outstanding Tay-Tay Tards as sweetsmoke1. Sweetsmoke loses it when anyone doesn’t appreciate Hicks and will go psychotic if anyone invokes the name of “Daughtry” around her or on her board. Very nasty. Plus I edited the names, reducing last names to initials because those poor folks do not need more wrath of Taylor’s two tard duo going insano on them in real life.

Of course this is happening on Labor Day Weekend, which is usually a big deal at the Florabama, so they are already taking a lot of guff from regulars unhappy with having the last few Soul Patrollers in town. I understand there are flights being planned and hotel rooms being booked by the tards. Being that it’s Labor Day weekend and 3/4s of all South Louisianians will be there I’m feeling pretty confident that hotel rooms are going to be very hard to come by. Plus flying in? To where? Mobile and rent a car? Lot of trouble to attend a concert at a dive bar. I’m sure it’s going to be very hard on the pace makers, walkers and oxygens of the remaining Soul Patrol. Have at it.

Man Boobs & The American Idol

August 1, 2011

Today I’m laying off the crazy fans and types like Mary Ann/Holly Sockpuppets and looking at some of the Idols themselves.

Mmmmbop kindly posted a link in the comments the other night to a clip of Adam Lambert singing his upcoming new single in concert. Something called ‘Outlaws of Love’

Thoughts? Looks like he’s rocking a similar look as “Hook” bad boy Rufio

Also in the comments some saw Man Boobs on Adam – or as I like to call them Moobs. I saw no moobs but then again I ditched after the first minute because the shrieking of the fans was ruining it for me. If I wanted to hear shrieking like that I’d just run over the foot of one of my Bumpass neighbors across the street with my car.

But it did lead me to start thinking about Moobs and the average American Idol male. Who does and doesn’t have Mooobs, who is likely to develop them. I’m thinking Taylor Hicks is probably hiding a pair and surely as plump as Clay Aiken has gotten he’s ready for a manzier or bro. My personal favorite Chris Sligh has got ’em.

You moob spotters, what type did you see? I have Moob charts below just for comparison purposes.

Leave a comment and I’ll get to them later. Right now I have to get a possum out of my washer.

What Other Fantards Do You Know?

June 9, 2011

I’m not going to talk about David Cook’s failed single, intra-fan wars over the single, Kerry Kolsch goes Green Acres or some of the restless silly in any of the other fandoms. I’m not even going to pick on Mary Ann/Holly Sockpuppets today as I sense she’s busy trying to get that room mate for her townhouse advertised in the papers and changing the name of ‘David Cook Uncensored’ to the ‘David Cook News Board’.

Just a caution: If you answer an ad to rent a room in Yardley, Pennsylvania please make sure you Google your potential landlord’s name.

Instead I’d like to ask you what other crazy fandoms you laugh over and follow. Please share in the comments.

Are there any over-involved fandoms or folks out there that make you laugh besides the crazy American Idol ones? I know there are tons of crazier than the most horny Claymate fantards out there of many different things, everything from beauty pageants to plastic model horses besides the garden variety sort following actors/musicians/politicians. Share what crazy fan groups that bear examination, laughing and pointing.

I had my very own fantard spotting this morning – I had a tard-spotting today at Target but I didn’t know it until the silly gal was driving away.

I was minding my own business, standing in line to buy some random junk for the house when the whole damn register belt ‘Tha-WHUMP!’ Looked up and saw a 30sih-40ish woman with an ass the size of Cincinatti but with a regular fatty above the waist. Weird looking, like someone sawed a very fat chick in two and a regular fat gal in two and then reconnected the wrong bits. Oh she was rocking the sartorial splendor of a hot summer day in the Virginia Piedmont. She wore a the squished and dusty pair of black Crocs with faded to mid-gray old black stretch pants with a t-shirt resplendent with a photo of the two leads of the “Twilight” series with the motto “Twilight” above it.

Okay, so it’s not a crime to not know how to dress appropriately for age, body type and social situation. I ain’t no (to steal L Anne Carrington’s phrase) ‘stuck up skeleton whore’ ‘SWANKY’ (yeah, I’m fat) but what she wore didn’t do her any favors. But I didn’t think anything much of it, maybe it was the first thing she could find. No idea about trip to tardtown yet.

This big old redhead keep yapping at first about how ‘sorry’ she was that the store Hoverround cart she was riding rammed the checkout stand. She was told, no problem. And then it got weird.

Miss Hoverround started to speak, very sotto voice, muttering to herself like the crazed shopping cart lady in the park that tries to preach to the squirrels. She started softly enough before she proceeded to mutter just loud enough for us to hear about how some people didn’t realize they were taking up space in the handicapped line without being handicapped. WTF? It was the only line open and I had 3 items. She complained about the smallness of the aisles for the handicapped, how Target had no respect for the handicapped, blah, blah, blah and other bizarre mutterings. The cashier and I just kept staring at each other and rolling our eyes over Lil Miss Fatty Handicapped.

Let me state here I have no problem with fat people in general but I do when they need to walk and clearly refuse to do so because the store offers a Hoverround cart for the aged or infirm. At that point I had no idea if she was or wasn’t handicapped.

I get my shit and get, go over to the Starbucks inside our Target to get a Venti Latte, it’s hotter than hammered hell here. I get my iced coffee just in time to see Miss Handicapped get off the store rascal and oh so slowly waddle out the front door with her two bags of junk food. (Did I mention she had ice cream, ho-hos and fritos along with other high fat low nutrition things? Yes, I’m being super stupid judgemental..) We were going out to the parking lot at the same time, in the time it took her to walk out to her vehicle (near mine at least 30 spaces from the front door) I had my stuff in the car, the cart put up and I was sitting in my car, curious why she wasn’t parked in the Handicapped parking section right next to the store. She finally got in her mini van and pulled out just in time for me to read about twenty Harry Potter and Twilight bumper stickers on the back of the car, including a couple for fan fiction websites blaring proudly the links.

Oh how I wished I’d have been able to reach my cell phone camera I would have photographed this nutty Twitarder/Pottertard in all her glory. Suddenly I understand the five foot wide ass and lack of social skills. I wish I knew her username on Fan Fiction dot net and the other sites because I have a sneaking suspicion she probably writes scads of Harry Potter getting boffed by Edward the vampire porn. It would be laugh and point worthy.

So, what other crazy fantardships do you know of out there. Let me know in the comments.

American Idol – It Begins Again

January 18, 2011

You know I promised myself I was not going to watch Idol this year at all. I barely watched last year but this year it was going to be not on my viewing schedule. But then it happened, I got sucked back in.

One of my other New Years Resolutions was that I would be kinder when I posted online. I’d gotten bored with frau crazy and hadn’t planned on posting here much at all. This changes everything. Being nice is overrated anyhoo and my family is already aware of my big old meanie-dom.

Once word came out that one of the contestants was going to be a Lafayette Louisiana Coonass by the name of Jacee Chipcoon Badeaux I knew it was useless for me to even try. I am a Coonass and am related to most of the other Coonasses in South Louisiana. I must support young Jacee and be on Team Coonass. Jacee all the way.

But I will not tard. That’s not going to stop others though. The ever sexy, talented, funny and wonderful Dr. Lulzington even did his own anticipatory to American Idol and new tarding tribute today. Any males that have made it to American Idol need to watch this and be prewarned or face the fates of David Cook, Adam Lambert, Clay Aiken and that…that… gray haired squirrely looking one.. can’t remember his name… Taylor something. Hicks? I don’t know. Having a menopause moment here.

Bring on the new frau bait!